Jane Eyre and religion

This is a paragraph i wrote on religion in Jane Eyre, if somebody could read and critique it i'd appreciate it :
In Jane Eyre, Brönte presents the theme of religion through the constant internal conflict between Jane’s earthly desires and her morality in regards to God. The morning after Jane accepts Rochester’s proposal, she reflects on her relationship with Mr Rochester, dwelling on the fact that, “he stood between me and every thought of religion, as an eclipse intervenes between man and the broad sun”. This highlights the emphasis of her love for Rochester, however it could be too great for her own good since it comes between her and her lord. The use of the hyperbole,”and every thought of religion”, emphasises how overbearing of an effect Rochester has on Jane, as he becomes a cloud fogging up her mind, restricting her of every other thought. It further suggests that Jane has become overly infatuated and dependent on Rochester, allowing him to take the place of God, idolising him. Furthermore, the use of a simile, “ as an eclipse intervenes between man and the broad sun”, illustrates that Rochester takes all the light from her life, leaving her in an epitome of darkness that can be likened to hell. This symbolism of hellfire suggests that their relationship has no blessing from God due to the underlying sin of adultery, due to Bertha Mason. Brönte shows this internal conflict to allow the reader to find a sense of comfort in Jane’s character, normalising her struggle in an era where speaking out on a distant relationship with God was severely looked down upon.

This is a paragraph i wrote on religion in Jane Eyre, if somebody could read and critique it i'd appreciate it :
In Jane Eyre, Brönte presents the theme of religion through the constant internal conflict between Jane’s earthly desires and her morality in regards to God. The morning after Jane accepts Rochester’s proposal, she reflects on her relationship with Mr Rochester, dwelling on the fact that, “he stood between me and every thought of religion, as an eclipse intervenes between man and the broad sun”. This highlights the emphasis of her love for Rochester, however it could be too great for her own good since it comes between her and her lord. The use of the hyperbole,”and every thought of religion”, emphasises how overbearing of an effect Rochester has on Jane, as he becomes a cloud fogging up her mind, restricting her of every other thought. It further suggests that Jane has become overly infatuated and dependent on Rochester, allowing him to take the place of God, idolising him. Furthermore, the use of a simile, “ as an eclipse intervenes between man and the broad sun”, illustrates that Rochester takes all the light from her life, leaving her in an epitome of darkness that can be likened to hell. This symbolism of hellfire suggests that their relationship has no blessing from God due to the underlying sin of adultery, due to Bertha Mason. Brönte shows this internal conflict to allow the reader to find a sense of comfort in Jane’s character, normalising her struggle in an era where speaking out on a distant relationship with God was severely looked down upon.