I don't think I'm ready for university anymore..
Hi,
I was quite open to going to university and found that I was passionate about going to my chosen university when applying and thought I would be fine adjusting to it. I am meant to be going to Kingston Uni in September to study Adult Nursing and I am honestly petrified right now, I don't think I'm going to cope well or be able to adjust. It all seems so scary to me right now, I'm 20 years old and had to put a halt on my education before due to mental health problems, but I feel like if I go to university in September I will be subjecting myself to so much anxiety and I feel my mental health will take another toll. I don't even want to continue my student finance incase i start university and need to drop out because of my mental health. My friend from college is going to the same uni and studying a similar course, we will be on the same campus and in some same lessons for the core topics. I went to a taster day at Kingston and I loved it so much but the thought of moving to London and leaving my mum and step dad. I'm scared that when I'm gone, they will stop loving me as much because I won't be around them. I don't know what's wrong with me, it's making me emotional just thinking about it. My father passed away in 2022 and I wish that I could talk to him about this as he went to University and he wen't to one far away, my mum is disabled and I'm also afraid to leave her incase something happens. I don't even think I'm ready to grow up, I feel like I have chosen the worst subject to study at university too as the placement balancing and the intensity of the course will really affect me, I don't think I will be able to do it. I always knew it would be a struggle, but now I am contemplating whether to just withdraw my whole application. I am definitely not ready to get a job, I have agoraphobia too so it's going to be more difficult for me. Is there a point to me trying to go to university if I am worried I will hate it and drop out? I will be in debt because of it and don't know if the risk is worth it. I also don't drink or like going out anywhere, and I know that's what uni life is all about so, I definitely won't like that either. I'm unsure what to do right now.
I was quite open to going to university and found that I was passionate about going to my chosen university when applying and thought I would be fine adjusting to it. I am meant to be going to Kingston Uni in September to study Adult Nursing and I am honestly petrified right now, I don't think I'm going to cope well or be able to adjust. It all seems so scary to me right now, I'm 20 years old and had to put a halt on my education before due to mental health problems, but I feel like if I go to university in September I will be subjecting myself to so much anxiety and I feel my mental health will take another toll. I don't even want to continue my student finance incase i start university and need to drop out because of my mental health. My friend from college is going to the same uni and studying a similar course, we will be on the same campus and in some same lessons for the core topics. I went to a taster day at Kingston and I loved it so much but the thought of moving to London and leaving my mum and step dad. I'm scared that when I'm gone, they will stop loving me as much because I won't be around them. I don't know what's wrong with me, it's making me emotional just thinking about it. My father passed away in 2022 and I wish that I could talk to him about this as he went to University and he wen't to one far away, my mum is disabled and I'm also afraid to leave her incase something happens. I don't even think I'm ready to grow up, I feel like I have chosen the worst subject to study at university too as the placement balancing and the intensity of the course will really affect me, I don't think I will be able to do it. I always knew it would be a struggle, but now I am contemplating whether to just withdraw my whole application. I am definitely not ready to get a job, I have agoraphobia too so it's going to be more difficult for me. Is there a point to me trying to go to university if I am worried I will hate it and drop out? I will be in debt because of it and don't know if the risk is worth it. I also don't drink or like going out anywhere, and I know that's what uni life is all about so, I definitely won't like that either. I'm unsure what to do right now.
Reply 1
A lot of these worries are panicky "what if" scenarios. Draw your mind back to what's real right now and focus on yourself and improving this situation anyway you can. I know the past is giving you these thoughts and feelings, but try to gather a strong mindset. Be around positive people, gain guidance from people on what you're worried about and let them try to ease your tensions. You might need therapy or you may need to restructure your thoughts. Also at uni I didn't drink or go out socially, you don't need to be like everyone else at university, be who you want to be. Let the light you have shine in the only ways you know how.
Reply 2
greatest condolences, friend ! i do understand your grief, it is very difficult to move away after such a tragic event; you just want to be close with your family.
i would say to take a year out, it is not worth sacrificing your mental health for a degree. you can always defer your place to next year. i would say to take the year to seek therapy and heal your anxieties. surround yourself with positive people, make sure to take in only uplifting media, as that can affect you too. childline is available for you too. share your worries with your family too and seek their advice.
hope the pain lessens each day for you
i would say to take a year out, it is not worth sacrificing your mental health for a degree. you can always defer your place to next year. i would say to take the year to seek therapy and heal your anxieties. surround yourself with positive people, make sure to take in only uplifting media, as that can affect you too. childline is available for you too. share your worries with your family too and seek their advice.
hope the pain lessens each day for you
Reply 3
Original post by Anonymous
Hi,
I was quite open to going to university and found that I was passionate about going to my chosen university when applying and thought I would be fine adjusting to it. I am meant to be going to Kingston Uni in September to study Adult Nursing and I am honestly petrified right now, I don't think I'm going to cope well or be able to adjust. It all seems so scary to me right now, I'm 20 years old and had to put a halt on my education before due to mental health problems, but I feel like if I go to university in September I will be subjecting myself to so much anxiety and I feel my mental health will take another toll. I don't even want to continue my student finance incase i start university and need to drop out because of my mental health. My friend from college is going to the same uni and studying a similar course, we will be on the same campus and in some same lessons for the core topics. I went to a taster day at Kingston and I loved it so much but the thought of moving to London and leaving my mum and step dad. I'm scared that when I'm gone, they will stop loving me as much because I won't be around them. I don't know what's wrong with me, it's making me emotional just thinking about it. My father passed away in 2022 and I wish that I could talk to him about this as he went to University and he wen't to one far away, my mum is disabled and I'm also afraid to leave her incase something happens. I don't even think I'm ready to grow up, I feel like I have chosen the worst subject to study at university too as the placement balancing and the intensity of the course will really affect me, I don't think I will be able to do it. I always knew it would be a struggle, but now I am contemplating whether to just withdraw my whole application. I am definitely not ready to get a job, I have agoraphobia too so it's going to be more difficult for me. Is there a point to me trying to go to university if I am worried I will hate it and drop out? I will be in debt because of it and don't know if the risk is worth it. I also don't drink or like going out anywhere, and I know that's what uni life is all about so, I definitely won't like that either. I'm unsure what to do right now.
I was quite open to going to university and found that I was passionate about going to my chosen university when applying and thought I would be fine adjusting to it. I am meant to be going to Kingston Uni in September to study Adult Nursing and I am honestly petrified right now, I don't think I'm going to cope well or be able to adjust. It all seems so scary to me right now, I'm 20 years old and had to put a halt on my education before due to mental health problems, but I feel like if I go to university in September I will be subjecting myself to so much anxiety and I feel my mental health will take another toll. I don't even want to continue my student finance incase i start university and need to drop out because of my mental health. My friend from college is going to the same uni and studying a similar course, we will be on the same campus and in some same lessons for the core topics. I went to a taster day at Kingston and I loved it so much but the thought of moving to London and leaving my mum and step dad. I'm scared that when I'm gone, they will stop loving me as much because I won't be around them. I don't know what's wrong with me, it's making me emotional just thinking about it. My father passed away in 2022 and I wish that I could talk to him about this as he went to University and he wen't to one far away, my mum is disabled and I'm also afraid to leave her incase something happens. I don't even think I'm ready to grow up, I feel like I have chosen the worst subject to study at university too as the placement balancing and the intensity of the course will really affect me, I don't think I will be able to do it. I always knew it would be a struggle, but now I am contemplating whether to just withdraw my whole application. I am definitely not ready to get a job, I have agoraphobia too so it's going to be more difficult for me. Is there a point to me trying to go to university if I am worried I will hate it and drop out? I will be in debt because of it and don't know if the risk is worth it. I also don't drink or like going out anywhere, and I know that's what uni life is all about so, I definitely won't like that either. I'm unsure what to do right now.
Hi there, I'm so sorry to hear about the struggles you are facing. Wether or not you choose to defer you application to university, there is no shame in taking a break when the time is not right. I personally have taken multiple gap years and only began my university journey much later on in life where it was also my first time moving far away from home. When you do decide to come to Kingston, there are mental health and wellbeing services that you can utilise to help cope during your time at university! Free counselling, listening, stress and time management sessions are available to you as a student. Mitigating circumstances and extensions are also possible in the event that you really need it. I hope this helps and wishing you all the best in your journey ahead.
Here are some links you may find helpful for future refernce:
Wellbeing Service - https://www.kingston.ac.uk/health/wellbeing-services/
Student Support Services- https://www.kingston.ac.uk/undergraduate/why-choose-kingston-university/student-support/support-services/
Withdrawal from Studies - https://www.kingston.ac.uk/fees-funding-and-payments/withdrawing-from-your-course/
Zhi En
(Kingston Student Rep.)
(edited 11 months ago)
Reply 4
Original post by Anonymous
Hi,
I was quite open to going to university and found that I was passionate about going to my chosen university when applying and thought I would be fine adjusting to it. I am meant to be going to Kingston Uni in September to study Adult Nursing and I am honestly petrified right now, I don't think I'm going to cope well or be able to adjust. It all seems so scary to me right now, I'm 20 years old and had to put a halt on my education before due to mental health problems, but I feel like if I go to university in September I will be subjecting myself to so much anxiety and I feel my mental health will take another toll. I don't even want to continue my student finance incase i start university and need to drop out because of my mental health. My friend from college is going to the same uni and studying a similar course, we will be on the same campus and in some same lessons for the core topics. I went to a taster day at Kingston and I loved it so much but the thought of moving to London and leaving my mum and step dad. I'm scared that when I'm gone, they will stop loving me as much because I won't be around them. I don't know what's wrong with me, it's making me emotional just thinking about it. My father passed away in 2022 and I wish that I could talk to him about this as he went to University and he wen't to one far away, my mum is disabled and I'm also afraid to leave her incase something happens. I don't even think I'm ready to grow up, I feel like I have chosen the worst subject to study at university too as the placement balancing and the intensity of the course will really affect me, I don't think I will be able to do it. I always knew it would be a struggle, but now I am contemplating whether to just withdraw my whole application. I am definitely not ready to get a job, I have agoraphobia too so it's going to be more difficult for me. Is there a point to me trying to go to university if I am worried I will hate it and drop out? I will be in debt because of it and don't know if the risk is worth it. I also don't drink or like going out anywhere, and I know that's what uni life is all about so, I definitely won't like that either. I'm unsure what to do right now.
I was quite open to going to university and found that I was passionate about going to my chosen university when applying and thought I would be fine adjusting to it. I am meant to be going to Kingston Uni in September to study Adult Nursing and I am honestly petrified right now, I don't think I'm going to cope well or be able to adjust. It all seems so scary to me right now, I'm 20 years old and had to put a halt on my education before due to mental health problems, but I feel like if I go to university in September I will be subjecting myself to so much anxiety and I feel my mental health will take another toll. I don't even want to continue my student finance incase i start university and need to drop out because of my mental health. My friend from college is going to the same uni and studying a similar course, we will be on the same campus and in some same lessons for the core topics. I went to a taster day at Kingston and I loved it so much but the thought of moving to London and leaving my mum and step dad. I'm scared that when I'm gone, they will stop loving me as much because I won't be around them. I don't know what's wrong with me, it's making me emotional just thinking about it. My father passed away in 2022 and I wish that I could talk to him about this as he went to University and he wen't to one far away, my mum is disabled and I'm also afraid to leave her incase something happens. I don't even think I'm ready to grow up, I feel like I have chosen the worst subject to study at university too as the placement balancing and the intensity of the course will really affect me, I don't think I will be able to do it. I always knew it would be a struggle, but now I am contemplating whether to just withdraw my whole application. I am definitely not ready to get a job, I have agoraphobia too so it's going to be more difficult for me. Is there a point to me trying to go to university if I am worried I will hate it and drop out? I will be in debt because of it and don't know if the risk is worth it. I also don't drink or like going out anywhere, and I know that's what uni life is all about so, I definitely won't like that either. I'm unsure what to do right now.
These feelings are so natural to have. You need to give yourself a break aswell though! You’re putting way to much pressure on yourself and putting other people’s needs before you’re own. I understand you have extremely difficult situations and I’m so sorry you’ve went through that. But you don’t have to put your life on halt for others or what you ‘could do’ or ‘should do’ because realistically whatever you choose to do as long as your doing it for yourself and your happiness that’s all that matters.
Reply 5
Original post by Anonymous
Hi,
I was quite open to going to university and found that I was passionate about going to my chosen university when applying and thought I would be fine adjusting to it. I am meant to be going to Kingston Uni in September to study Adult Nursing and I am honestly petrified right now, I don't think I'm going to cope well or be able to adjust. It all seems so scary to me right now, I'm 20 years old and had to put a halt on my education before due to mental health problems, but I feel like if I go to university in September I will be subjecting myself to so much anxiety and I feel my mental health will take another toll. I don't even want to continue my student finance incase i start university and need to drop out because of my mental health. My friend from college is going to the same uni and studying a similar course, we will be on the same campus and in some same lessons for the core topics. I went to a taster day at Kingston and I loved it so much but the thought of moving to London and leaving my mum and step dad. I'm scared that when I'm gone, they will stop loving me as much because I won't be around them. I don't know what's wrong with me, it's making me emotional just thinking about it. My father passed away in 2022 and I wish that I could talk to him about this as he went to University and he wen't to one far away, my mum is disabled and I'm also afraid to leave her incase something happens. I don't even think I'm ready to grow up, I feel like I have chosen the worst subject to study at university too as the placement balancing and the intensity of the course will really affect me, I don't think I will be able to do it. I always knew it would be a struggle, but now I am contemplating whether to just withdraw my whole application. I am definitely not ready to get a job, I have agoraphobia too so it's going to be more difficult for me. Is there a point to me trying to go to university if I am worried I will hate it and drop out? I will be in debt because of it and don't know if the risk is worth it. I also don't drink or like going out anywhere, and I know that's what uni life is all about so, I definitely won't like that either. I'm unsure what to do right now.
I was quite open to going to university and found that I was passionate about going to my chosen university when applying and thought I would be fine adjusting to it. I am meant to be going to Kingston Uni in September to study Adult Nursing and I am honestly petrified right now, I don't think I'm going to cope well or be able to adjust. It all seems so scary to me right now, I'm 20 years old and had to put a halt on my education before due to mental health problems, but I feel like if I go to university in September I will be subjecting myself to so much anxiety and I feel my mental health will take another toll. I don't even want to continue my student finance incase i start university and need to drop out because of my mental health. My friend from college is going to the same uni and studying a similar course, we will be on the same campus and in some same lessons for the core topics. I went to a taster day at Kingston and I loved it so much but the thought of moving to London and leaving my mum and step dad. I'm scared that when I'm gone, they will stop loving me as much because I won't be around them. I don't know what's wrong with me, it's making me emotional just thinking about it. My father passed away in 2022 and I wish that I could talk to him about this as he went to University and he wen't to one far away, my mum is disabled and I'm also afraid to leave her incase something happens. I don't even think I'm ready to grow up, I feel like I have chosen the worst subject to study at university too as the placement balancing and the intensity of the course will really affect me, I don't think I will be able to do it. I always knew it would be a struggle, but now I am contemplating whether to just withdraw my whole application. I am definitely not ready to get a job, I have agoraphobia too so it's going to be more difficult for me. Is there a point to me trying to go to university if I am worried I will hate it and drop out? I will be in debt because of it and don't know if the risk is worth it. I also don't drink or like going out anywhere, and I know that's what uni life is all about so, I definitely won't like that either. I'm unsure what to do right now.
Life is tough, big decisions like this are tough, so let yourself breathe and remember you can choose what you want to do. If you really feel that you can’t manage uni right now, then 100% prioritise your mental health and your wellbeing. You’ll have plenty more years to go to uni if that’s what you want to do. I would also say don’t let mental health hold you back, you’re so much stronger than you think so don’t let the worries, fears and the ‘what-ifs’ stop you because look how far you’ve already come.
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