Pls mark english language igcse

Someone mark this for my sister:

Its question 5 of this paper
Give grade and mark and WWW EBI

https://cdn.savemyexams.com/uploads/2024/03/4ea1-01-que-20230113.pdf

The writers both convey similar feelings and experiences about meeting the birds for the first time. In Text One, the writer describes the creature “Scutt [ling] around in the gutter. This reveals that the magpie maybe frightened of the surrounding because they maybe in a new place. The word “scuttles” shows that the magpie could be scavenging around for shiny objects as they are fascinated by their appearance. In addition, the word “scuttles” can also emphasise the magpie’s fast movements due to the fact that it may not want to be noticed. Contrastingly, the word “corner” can give negative connotations to the reader that the magpie is suspicious or being secretive. IN Text 1, the writer meets the magpie for the first time. However, in Text 2 the writer adopted the goshawk following the tragic passing of her father. This is revealed when it says “This was not my hawk.” The line is repeated multiple times in the extract and this can suggest Macdonalds’s panic over the sitiuation. Furthermore, she may ave been under a sense of extreme shock because of the experience. Also, she uses italics to heighten the tension and add emphasis. Despite this difference, the sources are similar because they are both written in first person.

Secondly, the writers both convey similar feelings regarding the two birds. In text one the writer is reluctant about looking after the bird due to the fact that they are extremely perplexed with what to do with it. This is revealed when it says “Isn’t there someone else who can deal with this.”. This reveals that the writer may not want to have the big responsibility. The two words “someone else” can demonstrate that Charlie may feel that he was especially chosen to look after the magpie. Similarly, in text 2 Helen Macdonald has a panicked feeling and response because of the magpie, revealing “This is not my hawk.” This reveals she is under extreme pressure and stress on a quest to find her hawk. The word “this” can suggest that she is disregarding the second hawk due to the fact that she has attachment feelings for the first hawk. Despite the similarity, the sources differ in that Text 1 emphasis how Charlie does not want to look after the hawk while Text 2 demonstrates throughout the disapproval of the second hawk.

Thirdly, both writers present the feelings about the two hawks through the use of similes. In Text 1, the writer describes the magpie as “demanding and unreasonable as a toddler in a sweet shop.” In addition, both toddlers and magpies are fascinated by colourful and shiny things like sweet shops and this could be the reason why Gilmour uses this simile. The word “demanding” can reveal the magpie’s sense of urgency to find something shiny and like a toddler in a sweet shop the magpie is attached to the thing they desire to have (in this case shiny things) and would do anything until the object is in their possession. Similarly, in text 2 Macdonald descibes the hawk like a ‘madwomen in a melodrama’. This could reveal that she believes the hawk is mentally unstable due to its intense emotions. This could reveal the hawk’s very dramatic. Despite this similarity, the sources differ in that Text 1 links the magpie to something that can be related to in real life like a “toddler in a sweet shop” while text 2 simile is something lesser on the happier scale and the reader may not be able to relate.

Reply 1

Physicist123

9

Overall, it is quite a decent effort, but I have some suggestions. There needs to be more regular quotation in my opinion. Having just done my exam today I used 2 quotes per writer per comparison in order to comprehensively analyse more efficiently and representatively, but 3 comparisons overall is enough. When mentioning individual quoted words one should try to always describe the language feature or article such as the dynamic, active verb ‘scuttles’ to increase the professionalism and sense of knowledge of speech to showcase to the marker. However, there is good, continued word-level analysis, which is vital for a high mark, but do take this point into consideration. Moreover, some points seem a bit too vague unfortunately. For instance, for ‘like a madwoman in the attic’ I would say the simile’s literary allusion to Jane Eyre’s classic character suggests the cruelty of entrapment and its intense desire for freedom of speech, symbolised by her wretchedly forceful silencing to mirror the misogynistic induction of passivity on women in the 19th century (I believe) to compare the hawk to a similarly victimised object of pathos. Lastly, the weakest points are always those that compare language as the central comparison, so I would try to avoid this becoming too central as you did at the end of your first paragraph. Therefore, I would give this an overall score of 17/22, but if you take these suggestions, you could certainly be getting 22/22. I hope this helps you.

Reply 2

Hellopeople!

OP

13

Original post by Physicist123

Overall, it is quite a decent effort, but I have some suggestions. There needs to be more regular quotation in my opinion. Having just done my exam today I used 2 quotes per writer per comparison in order to comprehensively analyse more efficiently and representatively, but 3 comparisons overall is enough. When mentioning individual quoted words one should try to always describe the language feature or article such as the dynamic, active verb ‘scuttles’ to increase the professionalism and sense of knowledge of speech to showcase to the marker. However, there is good, continued word-level analysis, which is vital for a high mark, but do take this point into consideration. Moreover, some points seem a bit too vague unfortunately. For instance, for ‘like a madwoman in the attic’ I would say the simile’s literary allusion to Jane Eyre’s classic character suggests the cruelty of entrapment and its intense desire for freedom of speech, symbolised by her wretchedly forceful silencing to mirror the misogynistic induction of passivity on women in the 19th century (I believe) to compare the hawk to a similarly victimised object of pathos. Lastly, the weakest points are always those that compare language as the central comparison, so I would try to avoid this becoming too central as you did at the end of your first paragraph. Therefore, I would give this an overall score of 17/22, but if you take these suggestions, you could certainly be getting 22/22. I hope this helps you.

what grade is 17/22

Reply 3

Physicist123

9

It depends upon the other components of the test, but probably a 7 (nearly an 8 grade) on its own.

Pls mark english language igcse

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