I feel like I wasted my time at university
To clarify, by wasted I don’t mean in terms of education I mean the social and community aspects of university.
Back in sixth form I was sort of coerced to stay at home in London for uni by my conservative parents. Didn’t really have much of a desire to go out anyways. First year was mostly online due to the the COVID pandemic. From then onwards I kinda just treated uni like a “job”, get in & get out mentality. All I did was attend lectures, study and occasionally interact with people from my course on academic related things. Didn’t join any societies, didn’t do much of any night life, didn’t even really try to make new friends, felt more like academic acquaintances.
I’m not an anti social person by any means, I know I seem like a major loner, but it’s just I viewed uni kind of like a classroom and a place strictly for education. Usually just hung out with my friend group from secondary school.
I’ll be graduating this summer with a BEng, and up until a couple days ago I felt content & satisfied with my uni experience. This September I’ll be enrolling at the University of Surrey for an MSc and I visited the campus and spoke with some people who’ll be on the same course. They’re on the 3rd year of the MENg course and I’m assuming they’ll be put together with the MSc students.
After my visit seeing how active and bustling the campus is ,lately I’ve been feeling very strange, almost remorse, like I didn’t enjoy my time at uni to the fullest. I’m sensing this is a 2nd chance and that I should be more open & outgoing this time but feeling slightly too old even though I’m only 21.
I know these experiences aren’t unique and experienced by lots of people who stay local for uni, I just wanted to get this off my chest as I didn’t really know who to tell all of this to.
Thank you to everyone who took the time to read this. If anyone’s got any similar experience or got any advice for me I would greatly appreciate it.
Back in sixth form I was sort of coerced to stay at home in London for uni by my conservative parents. Didn’t really have much of a desire to go out anyways. First year was mostly online due to the the COVID pandemic. From then onwards I kinda just treated uni like a “job”, get in & get out mentality. All I did was attend lectures, study and occasionally interact with people from my course on academic related things. Didn’t join any societies, didn’t do much of any night life, didn’t even really try to make new friends, felt more like academic acquaintances.
I’m not an anti social person by any means, I know I seem like a major loner, but it’s just I viewed uni kind of like a classroom and a place strictly for education. Usually just hung out with my friend group from secondary school.
I’ll be graduating this summer with a BEng, and up until a couple days ago I felt content & satisfied with my uni experience. This September I’ll be enrolling at the University of Surrey for an MSc and I visited the campus and spoke with some people who’ll be on the same course. They’re on the 3rd year of the MENg course and I’m assuming they’ll be put together with the MSc students.
After my visit seeing how active and bustling the campus is ,lately I’ve been feeling very strange, almost remorse, like I didn’t enjoy my time at uni to the fullest. I’m sensing this is a 2nd chance and that I should be more open & outgoing this time but feeling slightly too old even though I’m only 21.
I know these experiences aren’t unique and experienced by lots of people who stay local for uni, I just wanted to get this off my chest as I didn’t really know who to tell all of this to.
Thank you to everyone who took the time to read this. If anyone’s got any similar experience or got any advice for me I would greatly appreciate it.
I have a bit different experience but the same as you I feel like I missed a lot of things. It’s my first year of uni I came from Ukraine to Sheffield and after a year living here I got to uni of Sheffield. I don’t live in accommodation instead I live in a house with my host-family that’s quite far away from uni. And every time I got to the lecture and afterwards decided not to go to any societies etc I felt more distant from everyone. In the end of the year I just realized that no matter what I need to join some societies and meet new people outside of my course. So, I’ve already applied to some of them for the next year. I’m sure it’ll be fun and finally will step out of my shell haha. I hope you will have a great time at uni doing your masters. Just don’t be afraid. A lot of people wants to be friends and go out or do something fun together. The thing is you need just to start later will be much more easier!
Original post by RWei1
To clarify, by wasted I don’t mean in terms of education I mean the social and community aspects of university.
Back in sixth form I was sort of coerced to stay at home in London for uni by my conservative parents. Didn’t really have much of a desire to go out anyways. First year was mostly online due to the the COVID pandemic. From then onwards I kinda just treated uni like a “job”, get in & get out mentality. All I did was attend lectures, study and occasionally interact with people from my course on academic related things. Didn’t join any societies, didn’t do much of any night life, didn’t even really try to make new friends, felt more like academic acquaintances.
I’m not an anti social person by any means, I know I seem like a major loner, but it’s just I viewed uni kind of like a classroom and a place strictly for education. Usually just hung out with my friend group from secondary school.
I’ll be graduating this summer with a BEng, and up until a couple days ago I felt content & satisfied with my uni experience. This September I’ll be enrolling at the University of Surrey for an MSc and I visited the campus and spoke with some people who’ll be on the same course. They’re on the 3rd year of the MENg course and I’m assuming they’ll be put together with the MSc students.
After my visit seeing how active and bustling the campus is ,lately I’ve been feeling very strange, almost remorse, like I didn’t enjoy my time at uni to the fullest. I’m sensing this is a 2nd chance and that I should be more open & outgoing this time but feeling slightly too old even though I’m only 21.
I know these experiences aren’t unique and experienced by lots of people who stay local for uni, I just wanted to get this off my chest as I didn’t really know who to tell all of this to.
Thank you to everyone who took the time to read this. If anyone’s got any similar experience or got any advice for me I would greatly appreciate it.
Back in sixth form I was sort of coerced to stay at home in London for uni by my conservative parents. Didn’t really have much of a desire to go out anyways. First year was mostly online due to the the COVID pandemic. From then onwards I kinda just treated uni like a “job”, get in & get out mentality. All I did was attend lectures, study and occasionally interact with people from my course on academic related things. Didn’t join any societies, didn’t do much of any night life, didn’t even really try to make new friends, felt more like academic acquaintances.
I’m not an anti social person by any means, I know I seem like a major loner, but it’s just I viewed uni kind of like a classroom and a place strictly for education. Usually just hung out with my friend group from secondary school.
I’ll be graduating this summer with a BEng, and up until a couple days ago I felt content & satisfied with my uni experience. This September I’ll be enrolling at the University of Surrey for an MSc and I visited the campus and spoke with some people who’ll be on the same course. They’re on the 3rd year of the MENg course and I’m assuming they’ll be put together with the MSc students.
After my visit seeing how active and bustling the campus is ,lately I’ve been feeling very strange, almost remorse, like I didn’t enjoy my time at uni to the fullest. I’m sensing this is a 2nd chance and that I should be more open & outgoing this time but feeling slightly too old even though I’m only 21.
I know these experiences aren’t unique and experienced by lots of people who stay local for uni, I just wanted to get this off my chest as I didn’t really know who to tell all of this to.
Thank you to everyone who took the time to read this. If anyone’s got any similar experience or got any advice for me I would greatly appreciate it.
@RWei1
All being well, you will be able to get to know some good people and form some great friendships but things might be slightly different as you will be doing a one year Masters rather than a three year undergraduate course. Other factors that might contribute may be the number of people on your course, their age, the amount of group or individual projects you have to do and the days you are in. I think you should definitely try to be pro-active, arrange to go for coffee, arrange to go for lunch etc... but things may be different on a postgraduate course.
All the best,
Oluwatosin – 3rd year student – University of Huddersfield
(edited 9 months ago)
Original post by RWei1
To clarify, by wasted I don’t mean in terms of education I mean the social and community aspects of university.
Back in sixth form I was sort of coerced to stay at home in London for uni by my conservative parents. Didn’t really have much of a desire to go out anyways. First year was mostly online due to the the COVID pandemic. From then onwards I kinda just treated uni like a “job”, get in & get out mentality. All I did was attend lectures, study and occasionally interact with people from my course on academic related things. Didn’t join any societies, didn’t do much of any night life, didn’t even really try to make new friends, felt more like academic acquaintances.
I’m not an anti social person by any means, I know I seem like a major loner, but it’s just I viewed uni kind of like a classroom and a place strictly for education. Usually just hung out with my friend group from secondary school.
I’ll be graduating this summer with a BEng, and up until a couple days ago I felt content & satisfied with my uni experience. This September I’ll be enrolling at the University of Surrey for an MSc and I visited the campus and spoke with some people who’ll be on the same course. They’re on the 3rd year of the MENg course and I’m assuming they’ll be put together with the MSc students.
After my visit seeing how active and bustling the campus is ,lately I’ve been feeling very strange, almost remorse, like I didn’t enjoy my time at uni to the fullest. I’m sensing this is a 2nd chance and that I should be more open & outgoing this time but feeling slightly too old even though I’m only 21.
I know these experiences aren’t unique and experienced by lots of people who stay local for uni, I just wanted to get this off my chest as I didn’t really know who to tell all of this to.
Thank you to everyone who took the time to read this. If anyone’s got any similar experience or got any advice for me I would greatly appreciate it.
Back in sixth form I was sort of coerced to stay at home in London for uni by my conservative parents. Didn’t really have much of a desire to go out anyways. First year was mostly online due to the the COVID pandemic. From then onwards I kinda just treated uni like a “job”, get in & get out mentality. All I did was attend lectures, study and occasionally interact with people from my course on academic related things. Didn’t join any societies, didn’t do much of any night life, didn’t even really try to make new friends, felt more like academic acquaintances.
I’m not an anti social person by any means, I know I seem like a major loner, but it’s just I viewed uni kind of like a classroom and a place strictly for education. Usually just hung out with my friend group from secondary school.
I’ll be graduating this summer with a BEng, and up until a couple days ago I felt content & satisfied with my uni experience. This September I’ll be enrolling at the University of Surrey for an MSc and I visited the campus and spoke with some people who’ll be on the same course. They’re on the 3rd year of the MENg course and I’m assuming they’ll be put together with the MSc students.
After my visit seeing how active and bustling the campus is ,lately I’ve been feeling very strange, almost remorse, like I didn’t enjoy my time at uni to the fullest. I’m sensing this is a 2nd chance and that I should be more open & outgoing this time but feeling slightly too old even though I’m only 21.
I know these experiences aren’t unique and experienced by lots of people who stay local for uni, I just wanted to get this off my chest as I didn’t really know who to tell all of this to.
Thank you to everyone who took the time to read this. If anyone’s got any similar experience or got any advice for me I would greatly appreciate it.
Hi there,
I think it is great that you are viewing this as a second chance for experiencing the social aspects that university has to offer.
It is a possibility that relationships on a postgraduate level might be different from those on an undergrad level. However, I have no doubt that you'll be able to find friends. What do you want to get involved in? There might be some sports, societies, and clubs that interest you, part-time work, volunteering, and things like that. Be open and pro-active when meeting new people, and suggesting to go for coffee or to study together is always a great way to get to know people better!
It is a common concern among students that being slightly older will hurt your chances at making friends, but I wouldn't worry about this too much. In my experience, I made many friends in my first year that were more than a few years older than me, and it wasn't a problem!
Best of luck,
Isabella
Third-year Geography with a Year Abroad Student
Original post by RWei1
To clarify, by wasted I don’t mean in terms of education I mean the social and community aspects of university.
Back in sixth form I was sort of coerced to stay at home in London for uni by my conservative parents. Didn’t really have much of a desire to go out anyways. First year was mostly online due to the the COVID pandemic. From then onwards I kinda just treated uni like a “job”, get in & get out mentality. All I did was attend lectures, study and occasionally interact with people from my course on academic related things. Didn’t join any societies, didn’t do much of any night life, didn’t even really try to make new friends, felt more like academic acquaintances.
I’m not an anti social person by any means, I know I seem like a major loner, but it’s just I viewed uni kind of like a classroom and a place strictly for education. Usually just hung out with my friend group from secondary school.
I’ll be graduating this summer with a BEng, and up until a couple days ago I felt content & satisfied with my uni experience. This September I’ll be enrolling at the University of Surrey for an MSc and I visited the campus and spoke with some people who’ll be on the same course. They’re on the 3rd year of the MENg course and I’m assuming they’ll be put together with the MSc students.
After my visit seeing how active and bustling the campus is ,lately I’ve been feeling very strange, almost remorse, like I didn’t enjoy my time at uni to the fullest. I’m sensing this is a 2nd chance and that I should be more open & outgoing this time but feeling slightly too old even though I’m only 21.
I know these experiences aren’t unique and experienced by lots of people who stay local for uni, I just wanted to get this off my chest as I didn’t really know who to tell all of this to.
Thank you to everyone who took the time to read this. If anyone’s got any similar experience or got any advice for me I would greatly appreciate it.
Back in sixth form I was sort of coerced to stay at home in London for uni by my conservative parents. Didn’t really have much of a desire to go out anyways. First year was mostly online due to the the COVID pandemic. From then onwards I kinda just treated uni like a “job”, get in & get out mentality. All I did was attend lectures, study and occasionally interact with people from my course on academic related things. Didn’t join any societies, didn’t do much of any night life, didn’t even really try to make new friends, felt more like academic acquaintances.
I’m not an anti social person by any means, I know I seem like a major loner, but it’s just I viewed uni kind of like a classroom and a place strictly for education. Usually just hung out with my friend group from secondary school.
I’ll be graduating this summer with a BEng, and up until a couple days ago I felt content & satisfied with my uni experience. This September I’ll be enrolling at the University of Surrey for an MSc and I visited the campus and spoke with some people who’ll be on the same course. They’re on the 3rd year of the MENg course and I’m assuming they’ll be put together with the MSc students.
After my visit seeing how active and bustling the campus is ,lately I’ve been feeling very strange, almost remorse, like I didn’t enjoy my time at uni to the fullest. I’m sensing this is a 2nd chance and that I should be more open & outgoing this time but feeling slightly too old even though I’m only 21.
I know these experiences aren’t unique and experienced by lots of people who stay local for uni, I just wanted to get this off my chest as I didn’t really know who to tell all of this to.
Thank you to everyone who took the time to read this. If anyone’s got any similar experience or got any advice for me I would greatly appreciate it.
Hi there 🙂
Firstly, well done on getting an offer!
I agree with the previous posts about being proactive. If you really want to meet people, you shouldn't wait for them to come to you, you should go to them. In my experience, people at uni are ready to chat and build friendships, but they always need an initial push that comes from either side. Try to join a society you're interested in, or go to a networking event on campus (there are many throughout the year). You'll never fall short of opportunities to meet people during your time here 🙂
I'd also just like to say, please don't regret your time at uni, and also don't feel pressured to make new friends. These processes take time and, at the end of the day, if you're getting your grades and achieving what you joined university to achieve, then you're winning. 21 is absolutely not too old, and you'll have plenty more opportunities to build friendships after university - possibly even stronger ones.
I hope this helps!
Marko
Accounting and Finance BSc
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