Seeing my best mate

So it’s been a bit of a weird month, me and my ex boyfriend broke up a month ago and my best mate confessed to me that he has fancied me for a while. I was shocked at first and was still in love with my ex and he had only broken up with my girlfriend the same week as me.
After a while I begin to realise I also had feelings for him but said I would rather take it slow because I’m unsure and also we still taking it easy from our breakups.
I have had been talking to him in a different way for 3 weeks before I went to go see him. Conversation was easy I met his parents and sister and we went out. After a few drinks we had our first kiss and more and it felt natural.
The day after he begins to act and text different with less emotion and kisses. I ask what’s wrong and he says he’s not doing it intentionally more tjag he’s just exhausted. The next day he’s continuing playing hot and cold, I ask what is going on and why he is acting this way and he replies with he’s overwhelmed and he’s taking time to process what’s just happened. I’m so confused what’s happening I thought everything was going ok

Reply 1

Crazy Jamie

Careers Forum Helper

I'm not sure what sort of answers you're looking for here. You've asked him what's going on and he's told you. Relationships are complicated, and moving from being best friends to being in a relationship is a big shift even with you having feelings for each other beforehand. You said yourself that you took three weeks of communication to adjust before seeing him. He's having his own adjustment period now, and that's fine. It's only been two days. When dealing with big feelings that's no time at all really. It doesn't mean it's not going well. He just needs to get his bearings. I'd be empathetic and give him what he needs, whether that is a bit of space or something else.