Telling my friends/flatmates I'm going to start flat hunting on my own
I've been flat hunting for the upcoming academic year with my friends since around January, with no success. We're in Edinburgh, so the rental system isn't the same as England where lots of students sign their lease for the next year in like Nov/Dec time. We've had very little success as my friends hadn't budgeted to pay rent over summer, which we were finding would be necessary if we wanted to secure a flat before we left Edinburgh for the summer. We are now 2 months away from the academic year starting, and have been told directly by the university's advice centre to expect to have to book emergency short-term accommodation as they don't think we'll find anywhere in time for September.
This has obviously been really stressful for all of us, and I'm REALLY struggling at the moment with some other personal things so the combination of all of this has led to a really significant decline in my mental health. I'm not sleeping, having panic attacks, etc. and my parents have essentially suggested that I look for a 1-bed flat and they'll try to help out with the difference in rent, just so that I can have other options for places to look at. While I'd love to live alone if we can figure out the cost difference and if it just helps me get this search over with so I know I'm not going to be homeless when I go back to Edinburgh in September, I also really don't know how I'd approach the conversation with my friends about no longer living with them. I don't want it to seem like I'm screwing them over or to upset/annoy them, as they're two of my closest friends at university. How do I go about this? Obviously I'd still be open to living with them if we can actually find a 3-bed HMO, I'd just also be looking at 1-bed properties
This has obviously been really stressful for all of us, and I'm REALLY struggling at the moment with some other personal things so the combination of all of this has led to a really significant decline in my mental health. I'm not sleeping, having panic attacks, etc. and my parents have essentially suggested that I look for a 1-bed flat and they'll try to help out with the difference in rent, just so that I can have other options for places to look at. While I'd love to live alone if we can figure out the cost difference and if it just helps me get this search over with so I know I'm not going to be homeless when I go back to Edinburgh in September, I also really don't know how I'd approach the conversation with my friends about no longer living with them. I don't want it to seem like I'm screwing them over or to upset/annoy them, as they're two of my closest friends at university. How do I go about this? Obviously I'd still be open to living with them if we can actually find a 3-bed HMO, I'd just also be looking at 1-bed properties
Reply 1
Original post by Anonymous
I've been flat hunting for the upcoming academic year with my friends since around January, with no success. We're in Edinburgh, so the rental system isn't the same as England where lots of students sign their lease for the next year in like Nov/Dec time. We've had very little success as my friends hadn't budgeted to pay rent over summer, which we were finding would be necessary if we wanted to secure a flat before we left Edinburgh for the summer. We are now 2 months away from the academic year starting, and have been told directly by the university's advice centre to expect to have to book emergency short-term accommodation as they don't think we'll find anywhere in time for September.
This has obviously been really stressful for all of us, and I'm REALLY struggling at the moment with some other personal things so the combination of all of this has led to a really significant decline in my mental health. I'm not sleeping, having panic attacks, etc. and my parents have essentially suggested that I look for a 1-bed flat and they'll try to help out with the difference in rent, just so that I can have other options for places to look at. While I'd love to live alone if we can figure out the cost difference and if it just helps me get this search over with so I know I'm not going to be homeless when I go back to Edinburgh in September, I also really don't know how I'd approach the conversation with my friends about no longer living with them. I don't want it to seem like I'm screwing them over or to upset/annoy them, as they're two of my closest friends at university. How do I go about this? Obviously I'd still be open to living with them if we can actually find a 3-bed HMO, I'd just also be looking at 1-bed properties
This has obviously been really stressful for all of us, and I'm REALLY struggling at the moment with some other personal things so the combination of all of this has led to a really significant decline in my mental health. I'm not sleeping, having panic attacks, etc. and my parents have essentially suggested that I look for a 1-bed flat and they'll try to help out with the difference in rent, just so that I can have other options for places to look at. While I'd love to live alone if we can figure out the cost difference and if it just helps me get this search over with so I know I'm not going to be homeless when I go back to Edinburgh in September, I also really don't know how I'd approach the conversation with my friends about no longer living with them. I don't want it to seem like I'm screwing them over or to upset/annoy them, as they're two of my closest friends at university. How do I go about this? Obviously I'd still be open to living with them if we can actually find a 3-bed HMO, I'd just also be looking at 1-bed properties
Hey there
I know this is a tough situation to be in but I think the most logical thing to do is to be honest with them. I know it's a hard thing to do and I'm not very good at confrontations myself but in my opinion, it's important to tell them. This entire situation is hurting your mental health which always comes first, and if they really are your friends then they should understand how badly it is affecting you. Anyway, you're only *looking* for 1-bed flats at the moment and you're still open to living with them, so it's not like you're ditching them.
If I was one of your friends and you came up to me and said this, I would easily understand because it makes sense coming from your position. So I would say start your search for 1-bed flats but also keep looking for 3-bed ones because as you said, you wouldn't want to be homeless!
Hope that helps
-Himieka
(edited 1 year ago)
Reply 2
Original post by Anonymous
I've been flat hunting for the upcoming academic year with my friends since around January, with no success. We're in Edinburgh, so the rental system isn't the same as England where lots of students sign their lease for the next year in like Nov/Dec time. We've had very little success as my friends hadn't budgeted to pay rent over summer, which we were finding would be necessary if we wanted to secure a flat before we left Edinburgh for the summer. We are now 2 months away from the academic year starting, and have been told directly by the university's advice centre to expect to have to book emergency short-term accommodation as they don't think we'll find anywhere in time for September.
This has obviously been really stressful for all of us, and I'm REALLY struggling at the moment with some other personal things so the combination of all of this has led to a really significant decline in my mental health. I'm not sleeping, having panic attacks, etc. and my parents have essentially suggested that I look for a 1-bed flat and they'll try to help out with the difference in rent, just so that I can have other options for places to look at. While I'd love to live alone if we can figure out the cost difference and if it just helps me get this search over with so I know I'm not going to be homeless when I go back to Edinburgh in September, I also really don't know how I'd approach the conversation with my friends about no longer living with them. I don't want it to seem like I'm screwing them over or to upset/annoy them, as they're two of my closest friends at university. How do I go about this? Obviously I'd still be open to living with them if we can actually find a 3-bed HMO, I'd just also be looking at 1-bed properties
This has obviously been really stressful for all of us, and I'm REALLY struggling at the moment with some other personal things so the combination of all of this has led to a really significant decline in my mental health. I'm not sleeping, having panic attacks, etc. and my parents have essentially suggested that I look for a 1-bed flat and they'll try to help out with the difference in rent, just so that I can have other options for places to look at. While I'd love to live alone if we can figure out the cost difference and if it just helps me get this search over with so I know I'm not going to be homeless when I go back to Edinburgh in September, I also really don't know how I'd approach the conversation with my friends about no longer living with them. I don't want it to seem like I'm screwing them over or to upset/annoy them, as they're two of my closest friends at university. How do I go about this? Obviously I'd still be open to living with them if we can actually find a 3-bed HMO, I'd just also be looking at 1-bed properties
Surely you don't need to tell them unless/until you find a single flat you want to sign up for?
Reply 3
Original post by Anonymous
I've been flat hunting for the upcoming academic year with my friends since around January, with no success. We're in Edinburgh, so the rental system isn't the same as England where lots of students sign their lease for the next year in like Nov/Dec time. We've had very little success as my friends hadn't budgeted to pay rent over summer, which we were finding would be necessary if we wanted to secure a flat before we left Edinburgh for the summer. We are now 2 months away from the academic year starting, and have been told directly by the university's advice centre to expect to have to book emergency short-term accommodation as they don't think we'll find anywhere in time for September.
This has obviously been really stressful for all of us, and I'm REALLY struggling at the moment with some other personal things so the combination of all of this has led to a really significant decline in my mental health. I'm not sleeping, having panic attacks, etc. and my parents have essentially suggested that I look for a 1-bed flat and they'll try to help out with the difference in rent, just so that I can have other options for places to look at. While I'd love to live alone if we can figure out the cost difference and if it just helps me get this search over with so I know I'm not going to be homeless when I go back to Edinburgh in September, I also really don't know how I'd approach the conversation with my friends about no longer living with them. I don't want it to seem like I'm screwing them over or to upset/annoy them, as they're two of my closest friends at university. How do I go about this? Obviously I'd still be open to living with them if we can actually find a 3-bed HMO, I'd just also be looking at 1-bed properties
This has obviously been really stressful for all of us, and I'm REALLY struggling at the moment with some other personal things so the combination of all of this has led to a really significant decline in my mental health. I'm not sleeping, having panic attacks, etc. and my parents have essentially suggested that I look for a 1-bed flat and they'll try to help out with the difference in rent, just so that I can have other options for places to look at. While I'd love to live alone if we can figure out the cost difference and if it just helps me get this search over with so I know I'm not going to be homeless when I go back to Edinburgh in September, I also really don't know how I'd approach the conversation with my friends about no longer living with them. I don't want it to seem like I'm screwing them over or to upset/annoy them, as they're two of my closest friends at university. How do I go about this? Obviously I'd still be open to living with them if we can actually find a 3-bed HMO, I'd just also be looking at 1-bed properties
Hi there,
Ultimately keeping to you're own budget and standards should be your priority, and it's totally understandable that you'd focus on that within reason. However, your friends really need someone that they can count on, especially in a challenging housing market. Therefore, the best thing that you can do is just to be honest about your headspace and wat you're thinking.
It will work out for you all in the end 🙂
All the best,
Jaz - Cardiff student rep
Reply 4
'Guys we've had no luck for 6 months securing a lease, if we don't find one very soon we all might need to start looking at other options like moving out separately or joining other flats"
If the uni prediction about needing emergency accommodation proves correct then you'd likely be getting split up anyway.
If the uni prediction about needing emergency accommodation proves correct then you'd likely be getting split up anyway.
Reply 5
If you’re still looking I’m in need of a flatmate!
Reply 6
Original post by Anonymous
I've been flat hunting for the upcoming academic year with my friends since around January, with no success. We're in Edinburgh, so the rental system isn't the same as England where lots of students sign their lease for the next year in like Nov/Dec time. We've had very little success as my friends hadn't budgeted to pay rent over summer, which we were finding would be necessary if we wanted to secure a flat before we left Edinburgh for the summer. We are now 2 months away from the academic year starting, and have been told directly by the university's advice centre to expect to have to book emergency short-term accommodation as they don't think we'll find anywhere in time for September.
This has obviously been really stressful for all of us, and I'm REALLY struggling at the moment with some other personal things so the combination of all of this has led to a really significant decline in my mental health. I'm not sleeping, having panic attacks, etc. and my parents have essentially suggested that I look for a 1-bed flat and they'll try to help out with the difference in rent, just so that I can have other options for places to look at. While I'd love to live alone if we can figure out the cost difference and if it just helps me get this search over with so I know I'm not going to be homeless when I go back to Edinburgh in September, I also really don't know how I'd approach the conversation with my friends about no longer living with them. I don't want it to seem like I'm screwing them over or to upset/annoy them, as they're two of my closest friends at university. How do I go about this? Obviously I'd still be open to living with them if we can actually find a 3-bed HMO, I'd just also be looking at 1-bed properties
This has obviously been really stressful for all of us, and I'm REALLY struggling at the moment with some other personal things so the combination of all of this has led to a really significant decline in my mental health. I'm not sleeping, having panic attacks, etc. and my parents have essentially suggested that I look for a 1-bed flat and they'll try to help out with the difference in rent, just so that I can have other options for places to look at. While I'd love to live alone if we can figure out the cost difference and if it just helps me get this search over with so I know I'm not going to be homeless when I go back to Edinburgh in September, I also really don't know how I'd approach the conversation with my friends about no longer living with them. I don't want it to seem like I'm screwing them over or to upset/annoy them, as they're two of my closest friends at university. How do I go about this? Obviously I'd still be open to living with them if we can actually find a 3-bed HMO, I'd just also be looking at 1-bed properties
Yes become selfish, better to have something then continue down this path.
if you’ve been actively seeking all this time you are either not searching appropriately or your expectations are not compatible with the market. If you’ve been legitimately searching for 7 months you really need to re-evaluate your approach.
I suspect if you take a more focused & pragmatic approach you could probably get this sorted in a handful of days. But you should definitely get on it (before results days)!
For reference ive gone on rightmove and found 7 three bed rental properties within walking distance of Edinburgh university just now (so there must have been hundreds of properties that have become available in that time period particularly in jan-April before students disappear for Easter). Im sure between Facebook/letting agents/spare room/right move & other platforms you could get it all sorted.
Reply 7
Having battled the Edinburgh flat market before, my guess is that it would be near on impossible to get viewings for any of those flats, never mind actually manage to secure the lease for any of them.
That being said, there are tactics you can use, like offering to pay several months rent upfront and sometimes even a rental price above the advertised one.
Hope OP has managed to find a flat, and been selfish if needed. Would also recommend the Edinburgh Flatshare Facebook group and SpareRoom (paid version) for finding rooms in flatshares that would be cheaper than a one bed flat.
That being said, there are tactics you can use, like offering to pay several months rent upfront and sometimes even a rental price above the advertised one.
Hope OP has managed to find a flat, and been selfish if needed. Would also recommend the Edinburgh Flatshare Facebook group and SpareRoom (paid version) for finding rooms in flatshares that would be cheaper than a one bed flat.
Reply 8
Original post by mnot
Yes become selfish, better to have something then continue down this path.
if you’ve been actively seeking all this time you are either not searching appropriately or your expectations are not compatible with the market. If you’ve been legitimately searching for 7 months you really need to re-evaluate your approach.
I suspect if you take a more focused & pragmatic approach you could probably get this sorted in a handful of days. But you should definitely get on it (before results days)!
For reference ive gone on rightmove and found 7 three bed rental properties within walking distance of Edinburgh university just now (so there must have been hundreds of properties that have become available in that time period particularly in jan-April before students disappear for Easter). Im sure between Facebook/letting agents/spare room/right move & other platforms you could get it all sorted.
if you’ve been actively seeking all this time you are either not searching appropriately or your expectations are not compatible with the market. If you’ve been legitimately searching for 7 months you really need to re-evaluate your approach.
I suspect if you take a more focused & pragmatic approach you could probably get this sorted in a handful of days. But you should definitely get on it (before results days)!
For reference ive gone on rightmove and found 7 three bed rental properties within walking distance of Edinburgh university just now (so there must have been hundreds of properties that have become available in that time period particularly in jan-April before students disappear for Easter). Im sure between Facebook/letting agents/spare room/right move & other platforms you could get it all sorted.
Luckily I did manage to find a flat (albeit on my own), it is often not that simple in Edinburgh (and likely in other cities, but I can obviously only speak for this city). Hopefully this information can be helpful to someone in future!
•
While there are a number of properties, there is also an INCREDIBLY high demand. We viewed MANY properties, however had had no luck at the actual application stage (simply due to the demand, not due to lack of preparation etc.) and unfortunately we could not pay a large amount of rent upfront or anything to make us more attractive tenants
•
Tenancies in general work slightly differently in Scotland, as there is no set end date to a tenancy agreement, only set notice periods the tenant or landlord must give to terminate the lease. So, rather than say signing a lease in April to then move in in September, you essentially sign the lease when you want to move in. Move-in dates for most properties are within a month of the date they're uploaded, but occasionally extend to six weeks and not much beyond that! Meaning, we couldn't look for flats in say December/January/February as we were all committed to student halls until at least May and obviously couldn't afford to pay 2x rent.
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