Being single is making me question myself
How do people even get in relationships, i just turned 20 and its genuienly making me depressed and scared for the future. I currently work at a hotel and i dont see anything potentially happening with any of the guys there (theres no guys exactly my age anyway) all i do is work.
I think dating apps arent great either and that ill get loads of matches and have various convos but it never leads anywhere. I just see or hear people talking about their partners and theres so many people at work with a bf or gf and theyll talk about them in convo normally but i cant relate at all and its a foriegn thing to me.
My last relationship was in upper school and that wasnt exactly anything serious. Ive never had a bf at an older age and i want to be loved so bad and wanted and someone to care for.
I feel like a freak.
I dont think im that ugly but idk anymore , or if theres something wrong with me i just want a boyfriend so bad and i want to feel what its like.
How do people do this?
I think dating apps arent great either and that ill get loads of matches and have various convos but it never leads anywhere. I just see or hear people talking about their partners and theres so many people at work with a bf or gf and theyll talk about them in convo normally but i cant relate at all and its a foriegn thing to me.
My last relationship was in upper school and that wasnt exactly anything serious. Ive never had a bf at an older age and i want to be loved so bad and wanted and someone to care for.
I feel like a freak.
I dont think im that ugly but idk anymore , or if theres something wrong with me i just want a boyfriend so bad and i want to feel what its like.
How do people do this?
Can you team up with some like minded friends and get out socialising once or twice a week. A decent pub where singles hang out is a good bet. Try some voluntary work or a hobby where you’ll meet like minded guys. Take some advice from more successful friends and see if they can introduce you to anyone. And dating apps do seem to be a slightly better bet for women. Something will surely come up
Dating nowadays is difficult. I reckon the best way is to get involved in social clubs or hobbies and try to mix with people with similar interests. You never know who you’ll meet.
Obviously to some extent you need to put in the effort of getting to know other people, and put yourself out there. But you can't force it either because it really just comes down to you meeting the right person at the right time. Don't be hard on yourself, you just haven't had that coincidence happen yet.
Original post by Santo253
Hey I'm 20 as well, wanna get to know eachother?
Sure
Original post by Santo253
Hey I'm 20 as well, wanna get to know eachother?
Get in there lad 😂💪💪!
Original post by lanadana
How do people even get in relationships, i just turned 20 and its genuienly making me depressed and scared for the future. I currently work at a hotel and i dont see anything potentially happening with any of the guys there (theres no guys exactly my age anyway) all i do is work.
I think dating apps arent great either and that ill get loads of matches and have various convos but it never leads anywhere. I just see or hear people talking about their partners and theres so many people at work with a bf or gf and theyll talk about them in convo normally but i cant relate at all and its a foriegn thing to me.
My last relationship was in upper school and that wasnt exactly anything serious. Ive never had a bf at an older age and i want to be loved so bad and wanted and someone to care for.
I feel like a freak.
I dont think im that ugly but idk anymore , or if theres something wrong with me i just want a boyfriend so bad and i want to feel what its like.
How do people do this?
I think dating apps arent great either and that ill get loads of matches and have various convos but it never leads anywhere. I just see or hear people talking about their partners and theres so many people at work with a bf or gf and theyll talk about them in convo normally but i cant relate at all and its a foriegn thing to me.
My last relationship was in upper school and that wasnt exactly anything serious. Ive never had a bf at an older age and i want to be loved so bad and wanted and someone to care for.
I feel like a freak.
I dont think im that ugly but idk anymore , or if theres something wrong with me i just want a boyfriend so bad and i want to feel what its like.
How do people do this?
Hey I'm 19
Would love to chat🙂
Original post by N0username
Hey I'm 19
Would love to chat🙂
Would love to chat🙂
Hi
Firstly, you are still VERY young with years ahead of you, appreciate you might not feel that way but its the reality, I wouldn't even consider settling with anyone until 30+ frankly but each to their own. My point is you have loads and loads of time and there is no hurry here, there really isn't, so stop putting pressure on yourself.
I think what you need to do here is widen your friendship groups/ connections. Not sure what interest groups are in your area, is there a Rotaract Club near you or Lions Club or Ladies Circle of round table that type of thing where you can engage with peers. Go to a meeting and then support an event, make connections.
My point being is that if you can connect with other groups or even hobby, interest groups, sports clubs, classes, clubs, anything like that, you will widen your connections, meet other people, make new friends that may also be single. By widening your connections you will have more fulfilment and ultimately that connection could strike you at any time.
Of course you always have online dating and sites for hook ups but my feeling is that's not what you are after really, you are in a cycle of work, sleep, work, you sound "bored" to me and you probably need some "me time" engaging in fun things outside of that and i hear your cry for "I just want someone special/connect" but it isn't something you can force, making connections in general, having a laugh, volunteering even, is the way to go here and heck, even if it takes you longer to find that special connection, so what at least you will have some new connections and laughs along the way.
You get out what you put in, so start getting active with interests outside of work. Hope my reply is helpful, i really wish you the best of luck, Take care.
I think what you need to do here is widen your friendship groups/ connections. Not sure what interest groups are in your area, is there a Rotaract Club near you or Lions Club or Ladies Circle of round table that type of thing where you can engage with peers. Go to a meeting and then support an event, make connections.
My point being is that if you can connect with other groups or even hobby, interest groups, sports clubs, classes, clubs, anything like that, you will widen your connections, meet other people, make new friends that may also be single. By widening your connections you will have more fulfilment and ultimately that connection could strike you at any time.
Of course you always have online dating and sites for hook ups but my feeling is that's not what you are after really, you are in a cycle of work, sleep, work, you sound "bored" to me and you probably need some "me time" engaging in fun things outside of that and i hear your cry for "I just want someone special/connect" but it isn't something you can force, making connections in general, having a laugh, volunteering even, is the way to go here and heck, even if it takes you longer to find that special connection, so what at least you will have some new connections and laughs along the way.
You get out what you put in, so start getting active with interests outside of work. Hope my reply is helpful, i really wish you the best of luck, Take care.
Original post by Santo253
Whats ur social, cant pm yet on here
I dont rlly wanna share it on here , if ur comfortable sharing tho ill add you
Hey first thing is it seems you got a few lads interested just by doing this post... However heres my take on it..
Dont rush ok, if you say your relatively pretty there wont be a problem, and dont go thinking everyone in a relationship is completely happy, its hard, its a roller coaster - its nice to be loved yes but it comes at a cost often and as a another sayes on here your young - theres no rush.
From your words you sound like a lovely hard working person with a big heart, you wont have issues finding a nice guy mid term however dating apps naa - like others say try real clubs, face to face is much better to guage people, plus its an easy filter to get decent people, because decent people attend those types of clubs that you attend i would imagine if you pick carefully.
Lana i wish you the best, you deserve a good guy, and I hope you find one. Let me know your progress
..
Dont rush ok, if you say your relatively pretty there wont be a problem, and dont go thinking everyone in a relationship is completely happy, its hard, its a roller coaster - its nice to be loved yes but it comes at a cost often and as a another sayes on here your young - theres no rush.
From your words you sound like a lovely hard working person with a big heart, you wont have issues finding a nice guy mid term however dating apps naa - like others say try real clubs, face to face is much better to guage people, plus its an easy filter to get decent people, because decent people attend those types of clubs that you attend i would imagine if you pick carefully.
Lana i wish you the best, you deserve a good guy, and I hope you find one. Let me know your progress
..Original post by lanadana
I dont rlly wanna share it on here , if ur comfortable sharing tho ill add you
Hey, I pm you
Original post by lanadana
How do people even get in relationships, i just turned 20 and its genuienly making me depressed and scared for the future. I currently work at a hotel and i dont see anything potentially happening with any of the guys there (theres no guys exactly my age anyway) all i do is work.
I think dating apps arent great either and that ill get loads of matches and have various convos but it never leads anywhere. I just see or hear people talking about their partners and theres so many people at work with a bf or gf and theyll talk about them in convo normally but i cant relate at all and its a foriegn thing to me.
My last relationship was in upper school and that wasnt exactly anything serious. Ive never had a bf at an older age and i want to be loved so bad and wanted and someone to care for.
I feel like a freak.
I dont think im that ugly but idk anymore , or if theres something wrong with me i just want a boyfriend so bad and i want to feel what its like.
How do people do this?
I think dating apps arent great either and that ill get loads of matches and have various convos but it never leads anywhere. I just see or hear people talking about their partners and theres so many people at work with a bf or gf and theyll talk about them in convo normally but i cant relate at all and its a foriegn thing to me.
My last relationship was in upper school and that wasnt exactly anything serious. Ive never had a bf at an older age and i want to be loved so bad and wanted and someone to care for.
I feel like a freak.
I dont think im that ugly but idk anymore , or if theres something wrong with me i just want a boyfriend so bad and i want to feel what its like.
How do people do this?
from the sounds of this post, it doesn't sound like you are ready to be in a relationship. i understand how you may feel behind your peers, especially with fomo as they experience so many "new and adventurous" things. but genuinely, if you feel desperation for a relationship, you need to step back from the whole idea and focus on yourself. from experience, rushing into relationships especially when you are really desperate for one will just lead to unhealthy consequences and a loss of self. rather than fixating on what you can do to get into a relationship, focus on improving yourself! self love is the form of love! if you are seeking a long term, healthy relationship, please adapt a “go big or go home” mindset; you should never EVER settle, even if that means you’ll be “alone” (which won’t even happen). always attract and NEVER chase; this is the most organic way you can enter a fulfilling relationship.
relating to your question a bit more, i personally think dating apps are superficial and surface level but i can also understand the appeal towards it. a more effective way of meeting people is just engaging in clubs/hobbies where you can actually meet people who are likeminded. but please, don't go to things like that to intentionally get into a relationship; it should be something that you unintentionally find rather than not.
the dating sphere is horrid right now so i wish you the best of luck! please never lower your standards and always know your self worth <3
Original post by lanadana
How do people even get in relationships, i just turned 20 and its genuienly making me depressed and scared for the future. I currently work at a hotel and i dont see anything potentially happening with any of the guys there (theres no guys exactly my age anyway) all i do is work.
I think dating apps arent great either and that ill get loads of matches and have various convos but it never leads anywhere. I just see or hear people talking about their partners and theres so many people at work with a bf or gf and theyll talk about them in convo normally but i cant relate at all and its a foriegn thing to me.
My last relationship was in upper school and that wasnt exactly anything serious. Ive never had a bf at an older age and i want to be loved so bad and wanted and someone to care for.
I feel like a freak.
I dont think im that ugly but idk anymore , or if theres something wrong with me i just want a boyfriend so bad and i want to feel what its like.
How do people do this?
I think dating apps arent great either and that ill get loads of matches and have various convos but it never leads anywhere. I just see or hear people talking about their partners and theres so many people at work with a bf or gf and theyll talk about them in convo normally but i cant relate at all and its a foriegn thing to me.
My last relationship was in upper school and that wasnt exactly anything serious. Ive never had a bf at an older age and i want to be loved so bad and wanted and someone to care for.
I feel like a freak.
I dont think im that ugly but idk anymore , or if theres something wrong with me i just want a boyfriend so bad and i want to feel what its like.
How do people do this?
i've just also clocked the flood of comments of men asking to connect - please never entertain anything that online. im sure they're all sweet its just way more messy and complicated (been there done that)
Original post by LsDad
Firstly, you are still VERY young with years ahead of you, appreciate you might not feel that way but its the reality, I wouldn't even consider settling with anyone until 30+ frankly but each to their own. My point is you have loads and loads of time and there is no hurry here, there really isn't, so stop putting pressure on yourself.
I think what you need to do here is widen your friendship groups/ connections. Not sure what interest groups are in your area, is there a Rotaract Club near you or Lions Club or Ladies Circle of round table that type of thing where you can engage with peers. Go to a meeting and then support an event, make connections.
My point being is that if you can connect with other groups or even hobby, interest groups, sports clubs, classes, clubs, anything like that, you will widen your connections, meet other people, make new friends that may also be single. By widening your connections you will have more fulfilment and ultimately that connection could strike you at any time.
Of course you always have online dating and sites for hook ups but my feeling is that's not what you are after really, you are in a cycle of work, sleep, work, you sound "bored" to me and you probably need some "me time" engaging in fun things outside of that and i hear your cry for "I just want someone special/connect" but it isn't something you can force, making connections in general, having a laugh, volunteering even, is the way to go here and heck, even if it takes you longer to find that special connection, so what at least you will have some new connections and laughs along the way.
You get out what you put in, so start getting active with interests outside of work. Hope my reply is helpful, i really wish you the best of luck, Take care.
I think what you need to do here is widen your friendship groups/ connections. Not sure what interest groups are in your area, is there a Rotaract Club near you or Lions Club or Ladies Circle of round table that type of thing where you can engage with peers. Go to a meeting and then support an event, make connections.
My point being is that if you can connect with other groups or even hobby, interest groups, sports clubs, classes, clubs, anything like that, you will widen your connections, meet other people, make new friends that may also be single. By widening your connections you will have more fulfilment and ultimately that connection could strike you at any time.
Of course you always have online dating and sites for hook ups but my feeling is that's not what you are after really, you are in a cycle of work, sleep, work, you sound "bored" to me and you probably need some "me time" engaging in fun things outside of that and i hear your cry for "I just want someone special/connect" but it isn't something you can force, making connections in general, having a laugh, volunteering even, is the way to go here and heck, even if it takes you longer to find that special connection, so what at least you will have some new connections and laughs along the way.
You get out what you put in, so start getting active with interests outside of work. Hope my reply is helpful, i really wish you the best of luck, Take care.
i love this response!
Original post by mvixig
from the sounds of this post, it doesn't sound like you are ready to be in a relationship. i understand how you may feel behind your peers, especially with fomo as they experience so many "new and adventurous" things. but genuinely, if you feel desperation for a relationship, you need to step back from the whole idea and focus on yourself. from experience, rushing into relationships especially when you are really desperate for one will just lead to unhealthy consequences and a loss of self. rather than fixating on what you can do to get into a relationship, focus on improving yourself! self love is the form of love! if you are seeking a long term, healthy relationship, please adapt a “go big or go home” mindset; you should never EVER settle, even if that means you’ll be “alone” (which won’t even happen). always attract and NEVER chase; this is the most organic way you can enter a fulfilling relationship.
relating to your question a bit more, i personally think dating apps are superficial and surface level but i can also understand the appeal towards it. a more effective way of meeting people is just engaging in clubs/hobbies where you can actually meet people who are likeminded. but please, don't go to things like that to intentionally get into a relationship; it should be something that you unintentionally find rather than not.
the dating sphere is horrid right now so i wish you the best of luck! please never lower your standards and always know your self worth <3
relating to your question a bit more, i personally think dating apps are superficial and surface level but i can also understand the appeal towards it. a more effective way of meeting people is just engaging in clubs/hobbies where you can actually meet people who are likeminded. but please, don't go to things like that to intentionally get into a relationship; it should be something that you unintentionally find rather than not.
the dating sphere is horrid right now so i wish you the best of luck! please never lower your standards and always know your self worth <3
See i never get when people rush into a relationship, even if i wanted too i dont have the option to anyway? Like if im being honest if i had the chance to be in one i would rn but theres nothing that could develop with anyone in my life rn and no one interested in me ...
Original post by mvixig
from the sounds of this post, it doesn't sound like you are ready to be in a relationship. i understand how you may feel behind your peers, especially with fomo as they experience so many "new and adventurous" things. but genuinely, if you feel desperation for a relationship, you need to step back from the whole idea and focus on yourself. from experience, rushing into relationships especially when you are really desperate for one will just lead to unhealthy consequences and a loss of self. rather than fixating on what you can do to get into a relationship, focus on improving yourself! self love is the form of love! if you are seeking a long term, healthy relationship, please adapt a “go big or go home” mindset; you should never EVER settle, even if that means you’ll be “alone” (which won’t even happen). always attract and NEVER chase; this is the most organic way you can enter a fulfilling relationship.
relating to your question a bit more, i personally think dating apps are superficial and surface level but i can also understand the appeal towards it. a more effective way of meeting people is just engaging in clubs/hobbies where you can actually meet people who are likeminded. but please, don't go to things like that to intentionally get into a relationship; it should be something that you unintentionally find rather than not.
the dating sphere is horrid right now so i wish you the best of luck! please never lower your standards and always know your self worth <3
relating to your question a bit more, i personally think dating apps are superficial and surface level but i can also understand the appeal towards it. a more effective way of meeting people is just engaging in clubs/hobbies where you can actually meet people who are likeminded. but please, don't go to things like that to intentionally get into a relationship; it should be something that you unintentionally find rather than not.
the dating sphere is horrid right now so i wish you the best of luck! please never lower your standards and always know your self worth <3
*when people say
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