How do you deal with your parents who do not want you to move away for university?

10

Hello guys, this is going to be some sort of a rant. I use to be so aspirational and wanted to study medicine at oxford and in london universities. The only problem is my mum is so against me leaving our city that she would prefer for me to put the same uni 5 times (like what?). I wanted to study at oxford or cambridge but i have been telling myself I just do not like the course for medicine there yet I think sometimes it is just because my mum was against me going there. The medical school in my city is great but I just cannot imagine half of my 20s in the same city and if i do my foundation years in the same city that will make me go crazy. My friends reminded me that I will not develop skills of independence if I stay at home and it is not like any of my friends are staying in the city maybe 2 but the place is not even guaranteed. I am currently at the end of year 12 but I do not really know what to do.

Reply 1

TSR Hippocrates

11

Hey there, thanks for posting a question in the Medicine forum. :biggrin:

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The "Which Medical School Should I Apply To?" Uberthread
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Official Undergraduate Medicine 2023 Entry
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GCSE Requirements for Medicine
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What to do after an unsuccessful first application
Funding medicine as a second degree

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Reply 2

Muttley79

20

Original post by paracqilo

Hello guys, this is going to be some sort of a rant. I use to be so aspirational and wanted to study medicine at oxford and in london universities. The only problem is my mum is so against me leaving our city that she would prefer for me to put the same uni 5 times (like what?). I wanted to study at oxford or cambridge but i have been telling myself I just do not like the course for medicine there yet I think sometimes it is just because my mum was against me going there. The medical school in my city is great but I just cannot imagine half of my 20s in the same city and if i do my foundation years in the same city that will make me go crazy. My friends reminded me that I will not develop skills of independence if I stay at home and it is not like any of my friends are staying in the city maybe 2 but the place is not even guaranteed. I am currently at the end of year 12 but I do not really know what to do.

Look at the course and the way they judge applications; this may not be ideal for your stats. If you aren't suited application-wise then that is a barrier parents can't argue against. All medicine degress are deemed equal but they are differnt in the way you are taught. I would do some research - What are your stats? What are your predictions? Whih unis match these?

Ultimately you are the one studying - I'm a parent and a teacher and I can't imagine putting such constraints on my children.

Reply 3

TMTDRN

10

Applying for the same course four times (you only get four choices for medicine) invites at least three automatic rejections. If your stats aren’t compatible with the entrance requirements, it invites four.

There’s no other way to say this: you have to man or woman up and tell your parents that it’s nothing to do with them and that you will be applying to the places where you have the highest chances of getting an offer. And say that again every time the subject comes up. Or just stop talking about it eventually.

Reply 4

Physician

15

Original post by paracqilo

Hello guys, this is going to be some sort of a rant. I use to be so aspirational and wanted to study medicine at oxford and in london universities. The only problem is my mum is so against me leaving our city that she would prefer for me to put the same uni 5 times (like what?). I wanted to study at oxford or cambridge but i have been telling myself I just do not like the course for medicine there yet I think sometimes it is just because my mum was against me going there. The medical school in my city is great but I just cannot imagine half of my 20s in the same city and if i do my foundation years in the same city that will make me go crazy. My friends reminded me that I will not develop skills of independence if I stay at home and it is not like any of my friends are staying in the city maybe 2 but the place is not even guaranteed. I am currently at the end of year 12 but I do not really know what to do.

If you live at home you will save a lot of money, given that Medicine is a 5 year course. You can still spend a bulk of your time at the uni, and go home at 9pm each day you are there. Joining societies will help, and you will be very busy with studies throughout.

How do you deal with your parents who do not want you to move away for university?

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