Am I stupid for getting upset over some guys joking about me?

So I met these two guys in the club staying here on holiday (well one I hooked up with who was with his mate) things were going well I was really getting along with the one guy and he was super respectful but the other one was a bit hostile. I’m quite an awkward person with social anxiety when I first meet people and my oddities were picked up on. I was invited over to their hotel again on another day and before I knocked on their door I heard them joking about me with another person there, I couldn’t fully hear what they said I just heard “but she’s nice though” at the end. I kinda brushed it off at first and went in anyways and we hung out, but the one friend and sometimes the other kept laughing after I said or did something that might have come off odd and it felt like I was getting clowned on. Idk if I was in the right to be upset or if I’m being too sensitive about this, especially because their sense of humour was egging on and joking on eachother so. It kinda hurt though because I was bullied a lot in school and it just felt like that again, and stung a little more so because initially we were all getting on.

This is one of the worst, and most unspoken about, feelings - a mixture of embarrassment, upset, insecurity, like someone is making a joke and you’re not part of it. Firstly, no, you’re not being “too sensitive”. It’s honestly such a **** feeling and can’t be put down to just their “banta” when they are not making you part of the joke/convo that is about you. Then it just becomes meanness or snarkiness. Honestly it sounds like the other guy is ****ed off that his friend kissed a girl and doesn’t know how to interact with you so he deflects it in weird jokes and talking bad about u etc. My best advice would be to (1) validate your feelings first (cause it’s literally the most normal reaction and you dealt with the sitch really well). And then (2) steer clear or distance yourself from the situation AKA that friend. BMT when you start not making effort with people who don’t make effort with you, or paying no mind to people who make your feel like **** or feel bad about yourself, like there’s something wrong with your personality or you have done something when you literally have done nothing wrong, life becomes so much more stress free. Sometimes it can help even to say something like “your friend is a bit standoffish” to the guy you like - I remember when one of my girlfriend’s mans was taking the **** out of my accent while I was on my year abroad and I ligit told her “he must be so insecure and childish to be taking the **** out of a foreign accent” and the next day he STOPPED. Sometimes it can help to call them out a bit then they know the joke isn’t landing how they thought it would and the facade drops. Although only do this if your sure and you kinda really like the guy and the other guy is gens c-blocking the situation or just ruining it. But otherwise ligit just distance urself from that one guy and enjoy your holiday. Don’t give the time of day to people who make you feel small so they can feel big. There’s so much stress in life and these kinda people don’t need to be a contributing factor to it.

Thank you so much for your reply it’s helped me a lot 🙂 I guess I beat myself up over it because I used to be able to not take these things so seriously and clap back but I was thrown off because it’s been a long time since I’ve experienced this the past time was secondary school and I’m 25 now, plus the guy I hooked up with was super nice and affectionate to me for the whole time and wanted to hang out not just to bang so I thought he genuinely liked me so the betrayal stung a lot.

Which Country on holiday, are they foreign ?

Pls explain "not just to bang" . Its hard to know what they were saying but the "..but she's nice though.." would mean that they maybe said something about it, whatever that was. Don't take it to heart seriously as they probably werent being vindictive maybe more just joking around a bit. I would just let the nicer one contact you separately and if he is nice he will do. Tell him you were uncomfortable and he might exaplin what joke was ?.

Pls explain "not just to bang" . Its hard to know what they were saying but the "..but she's nice though.." would mean that they maybe said something about it, whatever that was. Don't take it to heart seriously as they probably werent being vindictive maybe more just joking around a bit. I would just let the nicer one contact you separately and if he is nice he will do. Tell him you were uncomfortable and he might exaplin what joke was ?.

They were from the states visiting London where I’m from.

Not just to bang, as in he genuinely seemed really nice and was eager to hang out just with me to go visit places and get to know me some more. And he was all ‘I’m so glad to meet you <3’ and everything I genuinely thought he liked me as a person.

Nah he wasn’t nice in the end either he patronisingly said ‘you need me to hold your hand’ when I was gonna leave to go home and his mate was s******ing. I ended up messaging him saying I heard everything yall said before I got into the room and he said ‘you heard all that and still wanted to come in lmao?’ Like he wasn’t remorseful even though he now knew I was upset.

He might well have liked you. You come across even in your writing as nice to be honest. Having met a number of Americans myself both in UK and US I know they are always fascinated by the differences, especially the british accent. They always used to ask me to speak some more as they liked it. And also the Americans are also a much different to us in UK. Maybe something that was misinterpreted ,or maybe they were fascinated/amused ?. Maybe he genuinely did like you.

Ah right, yes thats not good then. Agreed. BUT do not feel bad yourself, it is them that should feel bad really. You sound very nice person, so keep smiling and you will find some nice ones.