Relationship or friendship?

Basically me and this guy had been talking on phone and texting for years and years. He had a go at me for not being "loyal" because I hadn't fully committed to him yet - BUT we never met in person and still never have!!! I feel like that terrible ex wife that everyone hates when the guy gets divorced which is ridiculous. I've never even seen him in real life. Yes there is a point to being loyal to a certain degree but I think he just took it to the extreme! For some reason he leads me into thinking we were actually in a relationship despite never meeting, I mean he does work full time so maybe in his eyes it was a relationship?

Now I feel like I should of been loyal but that's insane because over all these years we have never even seen each other in real life!! Yes I agree you should be loyal but jeez that's taking it far don't you think? For a while there I wanted a relationship with him but I realised due to personal reasons I'm not ready for that. I really enjoyed his friendship! We would talk everyday sometimes on the phone or texting. Just his friendship was nice for me don't understand why everything has to be complicated!! Now he doesn't talk to me at all. Should I just let it go? He was my best friend for years.

I really don't Wana just let it go but I don't Wana force myself into his life if he doesn't want me there you know? He said his dad isn't well nor is someone else he knows so maybe he's just having a hard time? Do you think he'll come back to me?? Thanks

Reply 1

Forlornsoul

Hey there

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You were never exclusive, so 'loyal' doesn't come into it

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You never met in person, so there's no real connection there, only the illusion of the person you want them to be

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I would cut your losses to be honest, it's highly unlikely things are going to go anywhere

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Much better to try and connect with someone in your local area

Reply 2

username7203900

In my opinion, I don’t see it as either a relationship nor a friendship. It’s a string of texts and calls with a little fantasy and wishful thinking thrown into the mix. You’ve never met.

For the sake of your own sentiments and peace of mind my advice to you is to be a little pragmatic, and to let him know kindly that if he doesn’t plan on meeting you in the next month, your lives must part in separate ways.

The fantasy may actually keep you locked in a loop where you wish something would happen but you’re also willing to meet other guys.

It is up to you to make the call, but I would end this as soon as possible.

Reply 3

Zarek

Knock this on the head, it has little going for it. Look for someone who you can meet face to face and want to be with

Reply 4

emma2892

Original post by Forlornsoul

Hey there

•

You were never exclusive, so 'loyal' doesn't come into it

•

You never met in person, so there's no real connection there, only the illusion of the person you want them to be

•

I would cut your losses to be honest, it's highly unlikely things are going to go anywhere

•

Much better to try and connect with someone in your local area

Thanks. Nobody in my local area is really my type I tried Facebook dating. I will be going to uni soon so maybe I will meet someone there? Guess I just have to be really patient I suppose.

Reply 5

emma2892

Original post by Zarek

Knock this on the head, it has little going for it. Look for someone who you can meet face to face and want to be with

I guess so, however nobody really approaches me. Maybe I should go out more to bars and things because I don't seem to be having much luck. I'm going to uni so maybe I'll meet someone there? Being patient is kinda boring though x

Reply 6

Zarek

Original post by emma2892

I have always found pubs where singles hang out a good bet. You can usually have some fun even if no love interests emerges of an evening. And of course uni will be a great opportunity to meet lots on new and interesting people