Comparing myself to prettier women

Feeling insecure about my appearance. I am a person is colour , my hair is not straight it is more on the curlier side if anyone is familiar with 4c. At times I have trouble accepting my own beauty. Today I attended this zoom meeting peer support thing and there was this girl who I couldn’t stop comparing myself to. She had a small forehead, really nice eyebrows and features and lovely long hair. What was meant to be an event for me to share how I was feeling and listen to others, turned into me jisy staring at her most of the time and just feeling quite frankly jealous. I know I can’t change my features as this is my genetic makeup. But I’m having a hard time with self acceptance and not comparing my flaws to other peoples strengths. I don’t follow any social media accounts that put me in this place but sometimes it’s harder when it’s in real life. I was contemplating leaving the meeting early but instead I just stayed and just tried to focus on other people as they were speaking. How can I accept my own unique beauty and not keep comparing?
I am also recovering from an eating disorder.

Its sad how POC constantly undermine themselves when it comes to appearance especially women. Don't go changing your features, they are unique and what make you YOU. Poc women are so beautiful and I think that the only thing you can really do is accept the features you have and do the best you can with the situation. For example, you will probably suit different colours more than another, Colour theory can make a massive difference to ur appearance. Stuff like that. Theres no harm in changing stuff like eyebrows bc you can just pluck them and they can eventually grow back to their original self.
Also remind yourself that if everyone had the "classic beauty standard" then no one would be beautiful. People who accept themselves and can feel comfortable in their own skin will always be pretty and also radiate. Of course its hard to have a strong mindset, as a poc myself, I have also struggled so much and I still do. But when I look at another person who clearly loves their features, they do have a angelic beauty to them. Also remember that you probably have features that other people are jealous of. Many people want curly hair. If you have thick hair, then many people want that. If you're on a darker or just tanner side, people want that. Comparison is the thief of joy and unfortunately there isn't a very quick way to get rid of jealousy, it will always be there.

Yeah I think curly hair is so beautiful. OP, you are wonderfully made and someone else's beauty doesn't undermine your own. Also, we tend to see superficial things and latch on to them. She may be desperately unhappy with how she looks. At the end of the day, you are beautiful and it's society that is flawed, not you.

I don’t think I would change them in any way, I even stopped wearing makeup years ago. I do agree with the colours. I love wearing different colours it just really boosts my mood and I like how it looks on mg skin tone. My eyebrows are actually very fine and not too visible which is why I always used to feel insecure. But I’m kind of over that. If more so just feeling insecure at times with my hair . As it can tend to be prone to breakage and shrinkage. I do have to handle it more differently compared to maybe people with straight hair. I agreed about people shining when they just love and accept themselves and they just look more beautiful because of it.
That is so true btw with people wanting other peoples features. Interesting I do naturally have very full lips and also 🍑 because of my genetics. I used to get so insecure over it but now appratenflg it’s a fashion trend. I still do have the desire to almost be the opposite of myself. Like wanting to have a smaller 🍑 as even as a low body weight I still have it. But I feel like it’s almost like trying to be something I’m not. My body even when I lose a lot of weight is not that of a Caucasian person. I do tend to still have some curves even when I was close to being underweight. So I know that I need to accept that different races also have different body fat distributions and characteristics.

Yeah I hope you're feeling better, just remind yourself that beauty standards are always changing so theres no point in trying to fit into one

Thank you!
What would you say has helped you with feeling more self acceptance for your own beauty?

There was a time in my life where I was envious of what celebrities /influencers looked like, so I decided to change it around and look at celebrities that had the same features as me ig. It didn't take away the insecurity as a whole but it did make me think "it's not ugly in any of their pics", mine can't be that bad. etc stuff like that. It's not complete self acceptance but it does get you to appreciate the features you have a little more.
Surrounding you're self with the right people is important too. If you are constantly surrounded by people who have similar features, you are probably going to feel different and insecure. So always make sure you have a diverse social group
Sadly, I don't think I have any more tips. I've just been mainly telling myself that we are all born different, we are all meant to be different so there is no point to be the same. The only type of beauty everyone should have in common is to treat people with kindness and respect. You will always be beautiful if you treat people beautifully.
I still struggle with accepting myself, not just being a poc but stuff like acne too. Everyone has bad days and everyone has good days - so don't be harsh on yourself if you are constantly down about your looks, I doubt anyone on this planet feelings beautiful 100% of the time.

Yeah nobody has the perfect life. I knew a girl who once said she had a terrible nose. I honestly think it looked nice. But she wouldn't believe me.
4c hair is very pretty imo 😁.

That’s a really good idea. I’ve tried doing that too so I can see more people who look like me and resonate with. Especially on Pinterest.
I didn’t realise how important the diverse social group was. At the moment I live in a predominantly White neighbourhood and before it never crossed my mind that it was affecting me. Now, I’m like I really need to see more people who look like more or even just different people because it’s affecting how I see myself.
Omg that last point was powerful!!! No one feels 100 % beautiful all of the time 💯💯💯💯💯so true !!!!