The Student Room Group

literally just rotting away

kinda a depressing title but ever since high school ended for study leave in around April I've been at home until now just waiting for mid September until uni starts. I've been home for 4 whole months doing nothing. I literally have no friends and my one friend is talking to me less and less. I hate change so much i wish i was still in high school even though i hated last year too. I wish I lived in a nice interesting city but I don't. I feel like there's nothing to do but lay around and rot and wait for uni to happen but I'm so scared because I don't know what it'll be like and what the people will be like. but hey at least I have a home and a family and food. sorry for the rant
Original post by Anonymous
kinda a depressing title but ever since high school ended for study leave in around April I've been at home until now just waiting for mid September until uni starts. I've been home for 4 whole months doing nothing. I literally have no friends and my one friend is talking to me less and less. I hate change so much i wish i was still in high school even though i hated last year too. I wish I lived in a nice interesting city but I don't. I feel like there's nothing to do but lay around and rot and wait for uni to happen but I'm so scared because I don't know what it'll be like and what the people will be like. but hey at least I have a home and a family and food. sorry for the rant

Hey there,

Absolutely no need to apologize for venting - we all need to sometimes, and we can all certainly feel like we're stuck in a bit of a rut too.

I think if you were to ask lots of school leavers and grad students how they're feeling at the moment, they'd all be similar to yourself. There's lots of change going on and it's really easy to end up in a repetitive cycle, waiting for something to start up again.

When I feel like this, I find I gradually start to feel better once I distract myself. And for me it's not always an overnight fix, but if I start little by little coming out of my rotting phase, I get back to feeling more motivated eventually. As you said you're going to uni in September, have you started thinking about packing? Maybe a little early to actually pack at the moment, but maybe you get a list together. You could also have a look if your uni has posted anything about their Freshers' events to see if there's anything you're interested in. Or - if you're planning on working while at uni - could you start looking for jobs near your uni?
I like to do small preparational things like this as it doesn't feel too overwhelming but I also start to feel more productive with my time. And it gets me more excited for the new academic year.

If you're feeling like putting off some uni stuff for a bit longer, is there anything at home you've been desperate to do for ages but have never got around to doing? This for me is going through my emails and deleting all the rubbish I don't need - super exciting I know - but maybe there's something you might like to do? I think if you do things day by day, you might start to feel a bit more like yourself, and eventually you'll ease yourself back into a regular routine.

In terms of being worried about starting uni, this is totally normal. When you first start you'll probably meet lots of new people, and most of them will probably be feeling similar to yourself too. Try to take some pressure off your new start - its important, sure, but you also want to be able to enjoy it as much as you can. I'm sure you'll find some amazing friends along the way too. Most of mine came from joining a society, so maybe have a look in advance at what your uni offers.

All the best. 🙂
Emily
Student Rep at BCU
Hi There

We hear that you don’t like change and there is quite a bit of change happening for you right now. It is normal for change to feel scary because it is unknown but often talking about how we are feeling can help us to navigate change.

It sounds like practicing some self-care to look after yourself could be helpful. Self-care doesn’t always have to be something extravagant it can be focusing on small things that may have a really good impact on how you are feeling. If you follow this link www.papyrus-uk.org/30-days-of-self-care-2023 it will take you to some self-care examples on the PAPYRUS website.

You should be really proud of yourself for being so open and honest about this. If this is leading to you having any thoughts of suicide then please reach out to Hopeline247 on 0800 068 4141 or Text on 88247 and a trained Suicide Prevention Adviser will speak to you and offer advice and support 💜
Reply 3
Original post by Anonymous
kinda a depressing title but ever since high school ended for study leave in around April I've been at home until now just waiting for mid September until uni starts. I've been home for 4 whole months doing nothing. I literally have no friends and my one friend is talking to me less and less. I hate change so much i wish i was still in high school even though i hated last year too. I wish I lived in a nice interesting city but I don't. I feel like there's nothing to do but lay around and rot and wait for uni to happen but I'm so scared because I don't know what it'll be like and what the people will be like. but hey at least I have a home and a family and food. sorry for the rant

Maybe you can join clubs, societies, meet ups etc. befriend people, be friendly.

There is a lot of support out there such as:

-The Samaritans, you can call 116 123, which is available 24 hours a day

-Mind, 0300 123 3393

-Saneline, 0300 304 7000, from 4.30pm-10.30pm

-The mix, 0800 808 4994, 11am-11pm

-SHOUT, text 852258, 24 hour text service

-Crises, 741741, text service

-Papyrus, 0800 068 4141, if you have thoughts of suicide or in emotional distress

-Rethink mental health, 0300 5000 927

-No Panic, 0800 138 8889

-Relate, they have a chat advisor

-Mental Health 24/7: 0800 008 6516

-hubofhope website, useful contact information for your local area

You can self refer yourself to talking therapies on the NHS website.

There is the mind forum

Also Facebook groups

You can join support groups

You can contact a crises team if things get very bad

Plenty of resources online, information regarding well being.

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