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What should I do?I am severely confused?

So my bf went on a trip to ladakh.Now.5 months earlier,they started to plan about his trips.I myself have always been very excited when he goes out because he sends me pictures and also my family mostly takes me to small sdistance trips.So,i asked him who all are going in the trip,he informed me 4 months ago that its his mom dad,an office colleague of his dad and his son and wife,an old couple and one uncle and his relative who are all colleagues of his dad,I asked him very clearly if any female whos is of his age or closer is accompanying them? and he answerd no.To give some background,i am not comfortable with him going ontrips with females who arew literally just 5 years or 7 years elder to him,not because of my mentality or smthing but because the last trips he went o all females who accompanied them were of close age groups in 20s or ust 30 and wore pretty skin showing dresses.So this time i clarified it out and was pretty assured.I went on asking this to him frequently in these 4 months and he would answr that no no ,no female i going and stuff,all people are 30 above.
I was reassured,finally yesterday he landed in kashmir and just for asking i asked who all are there with you guys and to my astonishment he said that there is this daughter of an office colleague who is there with the.I couldnt believe and asked him againa nd he confirmed it,on telling why he lied to me all this while he said he was scared,and also gave excuses that she was above 30 and that she was enagaged and ********.I feel like a clown..I invited him so many times ,laughed and cried on his chest for reassurance that hey will you be allrigt there?He looked into my eyes and told me so many things,but for once did he not mention that she was going.He knew it from the get go.What should I do?I feel veryvery confused
Original post by Anonymous
So my bf went on a trip to ladakh.Now.5 months earlier,they started to plan about his trips.I myself have always been very excited when he goes out because he sends me pictures and also my family mostly takes me to small sdistance trips.So,i asked him who all are going in the trip,he informed me 4 months ago that its his mom dad,an office colleague of his dad and his son and wife,an old couple and one uncle and his relative who are all colleagues of his dad,I asked him very clearly if any female whos is of his age or closer is accompanying them? and he answerd no.To give some background,i am not comfortable with him going ontrips with females who arew literally just 5 years or 7 years elder to him,not because of my mentality or smthing but because the last trips he went o all females who accompanied them were of close age groups in 20s or ust 30 and wore pretty skin showing dresses.So this time i clarified it out and was pretty assured.I went on asking this to him frequently in these 4 months and he would answr that no no ,no female i going and stuff,all people are 30 above.
I was reassured,finally yesterday he landed in kashmir and just for asking i asked who all are there with you guys and to my astonishment he said that there is this daughter of an office colleague who is there with the.I couldnt believe and asked him againa nd he confirmed it,on telling why he lied to me all this while he said he was scared,and also gave excuses that she was above 30 and that she was enagaged and ********.I feel like a clown..I invited him so many times ,laughed and cried on his chest for reassurance that hey will you be allrigt there?He looked into my eyes and told me so many things,but for once did he not mention that she was going.He knew it from the get go.What should I do?I feel veryvery confused

Look, seriously the more you worry, the more you transmit your worry to him, the worse it will be. Best just say that you are not happy he wasnt honest with you and leave at that. The more confident in yourself that you are then the better for you.
If say I was going out with someone I actually was fond of and loved (I am talking as a man) then I really would not wish to break that trust by sleeping around etc. "The more you chase the more he will run away" Best show him that you are confident in yourself and him that he will not breach that trust.
Maybe also just say ,I will trust you that you will not breach my trust in you. That will sow a seed in his mind ,and if he
has any morals he will find it hard, mentally, to then breach that trust you have said you have.
(edited 5 months ago)
Reply 2
Original post by reallyismyname
Look, seriously the more you worry, the more you transmit your worry to him, the worse it will be. Best just say that you are not happy he wasnt honest with you and leave at that. The more confident in yourself that you are then the better for you.
If say I was going out with someone I actually was fond of and loved (I am talking as a man) then I really would not wish to break that trust by sleeping around etc. "The more you chase the more he will run away" Best show him that you are confident in yourself and him that he will not breach that trust.
Maybe also just say ,I will trust you that you will not breach my trust in you. That will sow a seed in his mind ,and if he
has any morals he will find it hard, mentally, to then breach that trust you have said you have.

ah okay will definitely keep that in mind.Thank you so much tho.

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