Friendship

Hi, for 3 years I was in a relationship and eventually we broke up, but then my best friend at college got into a relationship with the girl I had broken up with, am I being unreasonable by not wanting to be friends with him anymore?

Reply 1

Anonymous #1

Original post by joe656565

Hi, for 3 years I was in a relationship and eventually we broke up, but then my best friend at college got into a relationship with the girl I had broken up with, am I being unreasonable by not wanting to be friends with him anymore?

I completely get where you’re coming from and i don’t think you’re being unreasonable, you’re just setting boundaries and they don’t seem to care

Reply 2

fghfgjjkujarjn

4

Original post by joe656565

Hi, for 3 years I was in a relationship and eventually we broke up, but then my best friend at college got into a relationship with the girl I had broken up with, am I being unreasonable by not wanting to be friends with him anymore?

No

Reply 3

Surnia

20

Original post by joe656565

Hi, for 3 years I was in a relationship and eventually we broke up, but then my best friend at college got into a relationship with the girl I had broken up with, am I being unreasonable by not wanting to be friends with him anymore?

Are you breaking up with him for not being a good friend to you since getting a girlfriend (which would warrant a conversation before doing that) or because he got with your ex and you're jealous? Did she break up with you because of your relationship or because she wanted to be with him?

Reply 4

joe656565

OP

2

Original post by Surnia

Are you breaking up with him for not being a good friend to you since getting a girlfriend (which would warrant a conversation before doing that) or because he got with your ex and you're jealous? Did she break up with you because of your relationship or because she wanted to be with him?

well I just feel like he betrayed the friendship a bit, he knew my feelings towards her ( I don't like her) and now he has just made it awkward

Reply 5

agcstudies

6

Original post by joe656565

Hi, for 3 years I was in a relationship and eventually we broke up, but then my best friend at college got into a relationship with the girl I had broken up with, am I being unreasonable by not wanting to be friends with him anymore?

I don’t think that’s unreasonable at all, a true friend wouldn’t do smth like that to you. Imo he doesn’t have much respect for you. Red flag.
I wish u the best on finding a better friend.

Reply 6

Dunnig Kruger

16

I generally expect my friends to put their penises before they put me. If they put me before their testicles, then that's an unexpected bonus from my point of view.
I tend to be a bit wary of people that come across as extremely virtuous. I'm comfortable with people that act in their self-interest.

I once lost the friendship of a friend over us competing for a woman. Never again. That's a mistake that I learnt from.

I can't help having the amount of empathy that I do. The ability to see and feel things from the perspective of the people around me. So that if an ex of mine and a mate of mine got together I'd see it from their point of view enough for it not to bother me in a big way and for me to be happy for them if they were happy with each other.

I realise that the original poster is feeling very upset over this. What might help is if he reminds himself that there's an abundance of women out there that would be a great girlfriend for him. And that displaying the highest levels of emotional and mental strength is attractive to women. And that the more you have a self-image that you're mentally and emotionally strong, the easier it will be to have these and to display them.

Is it reasonable to be emotionally upset over your best mate going out with your ex? It's reasonable enough.
Would it be emotionally stronger to put aside your upset as much as you can and to interact with your ex and your mate in as positive a way as possible? Of course it would.

Friendship

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