Living alone?

Hi everyone. I currently have a daily school commute of anywhere between 3.5-4.5 hours a day. It’s on a noisy minibus with a couple of students from younger years, who (no matter how many times I tell them) don’t understand that they can’t play TikToks out loud in public. I’m going into my final year of school and I literally hate it so much, I can’t even contemplate going back to it next year. Last year, my grades, physical health and mental wellbeing hugely suffered because of my commute, and I just can’t cope with the thought that I’m going back to it again.

My mum has a flat across the road from school, which my brother is currently living in. One solution that I’ve suggested is that I live there Monday to Friday, with him, and that I go back to my parents’ house for the weekends. But my mum in particular seems really against this - she’s argued that I would need someone there to supervise my physical health (I have Crohn’s disease) and that cooking, dishes and laundry etc. would all take more time than I realised. I argued that literally any amount of time spent bettering myself in some physical way (like cooking or exercising) and making myself stronger and more independent for uni is time better spent than sitting on my bus. She’s worried that I’d be taking away from my brother’s cool bachelor lifestyle (he’s 23) and that there might also be some legality issues around it since I’m still 17.

I just wanted to extend the problem out to everyone on Student Room and see what they thought. Part of the reason we never moved is because when I was younger, I didn’t have my disease. I didn’t really get fatigued by the journey, even though it was very long. Additionally, before this year I took a short train, had a half hour break, and then took a much quieter bus. This is no longer really feasible because I would be worried about something happening health-wise in public (commute adds up to the same amount of time, just has that break in the middle).

What do people think?

Reply 1

syed..

The situation you're in is really tough and it's understandable that you're feeling so stressed and overwhelmed. Long commutes can be incredibly draining, especially when they're noisy and uncomfortable. It's great that you're considering solutions to improve your situation, and it's also important to be mindful of your physical and mental health.
It's understandable that your mum is concerned about your well-being, especially given your Crohn's disease. However, it's important to have an open and honest conversation with her about your needs and the benefits of living at the flat. You could also discuss potential solutions, such as having a friend or family member check in on you regularly or arranging for meals to be delivered.

Ultimately, the best solution for you will depend on your individual circumstances and priorities. It's important to weigh the pros and cons of each option carefully and choose the one that you feel will work best for you.
It's also important to remember that you are not alone in this. Many students face long commutes and other challenges, and there are resources available to help you cope.