The Student Room Group

How safe is it to have sex/ hookups from online dating apps

I matched with a guy on a dating app. I'm 18F (also virgin) and would like to have sex with the guy who's 25. Am I being really stupid? Is this a super unsafe idea? Also am starting uni in Sep and will be living in halls - not sure how it works with inviting people over/ having visitors

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Original post by Anonymous
I matched with a guy on a dating app. I'm 18F (also virgin) and would like to have sex with the guy who's 25. Am I being really stupid? Is this a super unsafe idea? Also am starting uni in Sep and will be living in halls - not sure how it works with inviting people over/ having visitors

Hm... yes and no. First sex will be much more enjoyable with someone you trust, so do not stress, but choose wisely.
Reply 2
I think it would be best within a relationship with a bit of trust developed rather just a hookup. As to uni, where there’s a will there’s a way
In general hook ups are safe as long as you use common sense, but I think for your first time you'd be better off waiting to be in a relationship.
They may have an STI/STD that they don’t say anything about.
Original post by Anonymous
They may have an STI/STD that they don’t say anything about.

Condoms should be good enough to stop them spreading if they are lying about it, not that it's an ideal situation.
Reply 6
How safe is it to go for a bunk up with someone you met in a club? Any discernable reason why it would be more unsafe than that by meeting through an app? Never do anything that you don't feel comfortable with,and keep your wits about you and you should be fine.
Original post by ROTL 94
How safe is it to go for a bunk up with someone you met in a club? Any discernable reason why it would be more unsafe than that by meeting through an app? Never do anything that you don't feel comfortable with,and keep your wits about you and you should be fine.

I think having a hook up with a random person from a club is probably less safe than with someone from a dating app, on average.
I expanded my search radius on tinder recently and matched a ridiculously hot guy in the nearest big city to me (but that's like 2 hours plus drive.) He's very different to all the local boys where I am but I'm currently debating the safety of letting him booty call me into the big city lol
Reply 9
Rest assured that most men want you alive and enjoying the act. Google/Apple Pay also means you don't need to carry cash so there's little to steal bar jewelry (take a sharp key if your especially paranoid).
Original post by Emily's Teapot
I expanded my search radius on tinder recently and matched a ridiculously hot guy in the nearest big city to me (but that's like 2 hours plus drive.) He's very different to all the local boys where I am but I'm currently debating the safety of letting him booty call me into the big city lol


I think the general rule is that if it feels too good to be true it probably is.
Use your common sense, initially meet in a public place, go with your gut instinct etc.

Beyond that, yes, relatively safe.
Original post by Doomotron
I think the general rule is that if it feels too good to be true it probably is.

I don't think it's too good to be true in the context of a city, which natural has a larger and more diverse group of guys. It's only too good to be true in that I'd never find a guy like him where I live.
Original post by Emily's Teapot
I don't think it's too good to be true in the context of a city, which natural has a larger and more diverse group of guys. It's only too good to be true in that I'd never find a guy like him where I live.

Arrange to meet him. Preferably by him coming to a town near to where you live.
See how you get on.

A proportion of great looking guys with great photos on Tinder are catfish.
Some are "biscuit tins". Pretty looking containers with not enough on the inside to make them worth sticking with.
Some have inner beauty to match the outer beauty.
Original post by Dunnig Kruger
Arrange to meet him. Preferably by him coming to a town near to where you live.
See how you get on.
A proportion of great looking guys with great photos on Tinder are catfish.
Some are "biscuit tins". Pretty looking containers with not enough on the inside to make them worth sticking with.
Some have inner beauty to match the outer beauty.

I'm only looking for a hook up to be honest...

The problem with him coming to my village is he'd probably be the first non white guy to ever be there. There's no way I'd keep it discreet. And I live with my parents. My dad would go crazy.
Original post by Emily's Teapot
I'm only looking for a hook up to be honest...
The problem with him coming to my village is he'd probably be the first non white guy to ever be there. There's no way I'd keep it discreet. And I live with my parents. My dad would go crazy.

We can't tell you what to do, but I assume that you're pretty new to this. If you really do want to meet this man, chat to him properly before arranging to hook up. If he is a catfish or a bot it should become clear quite quickly - and even if you're confident that he's real, meet him in a public space like a restaurant. If you feel comfortable enough, then proceed to do what you want. But please, tell a friend of the plan and when you're leaving the public space so that they know and can alert the authorities should anything happen. When my friend went for one in Hamburg, that's what he (rightly) told me to do.
Original post by Nathanielle_
Hm... yes and no. First sex will be much more enjoyable with someone you trust, so do not stress, but choose wisely.

You need to ensure that you are both consenting.

The below gives a good insight into consent., including what it is and why it’s important!

https://www.eventumlegal.co.uk/what-is-consent-understanding-consent-and-the-legal-implications
Original post by Anonymous
I matched with a guy on a dating app. I'm 18F (also virgin) and would like to have sex with the guy who's 25. Am I being really stupid? Is this a super unsafe idea? Also am starting uni in Sep and will be living in halls - not sure how it works with inviting people over/ having visitors
When would you like to do this
Original post by Anonymous
I matched with a guy on a dating app. I'm 18F (also virgin) and would like to have sex with the guy who's 25. Am I being really stupid? Is this a super unsafe idea? Also am starting uni in Sep and will be living in halls - not sure how it works with inviting people over/ having visitors

When would you like to do this
Original post by Aaron2319
When would you like to do this

@Aaron2319 don't think she desperate enough to contact you!

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