Rates pleaseee on my book start

Starting a book with a scene where the reader is wondering what's going on is a good way to start.
EG the first page of 1984 is considered a classic.
Are you an expert in 1930's to 1940's history?
If not change the setting.
Make it in the modern day. Or a possible near future if you want the backdrop of war.
Writing tends to be better when it's based on personal experience.
I found what you wrote too confusing. Too many different things covered in too short a space.
Slow down. Write one scene at a time. With not too few words and not too many. Just the right amount to move the action along.

Why was Lili kidnapped when WW2 hadn't started?
Why was she so badly injured when the SS employed women in actual jobs?
How did the SS leave a photo of them with Lili when Polaroid cameras hadn't been invented?
Why is the phrase PTSD used when it came into use in the 1970s?
Why did she have a number tattoo when the SS had blood group tattoos?
Sensational (but not in a good way), somewhat incomprehensible and needs fact-checking!


1952.odt

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1952
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AUGUST 31ST*1939
Thoughts of marriage clouded his mind, just*knowing that he may get the chance to spend the*rest of his life with this woman was more than*enough, yet he longed for that kiss on that beautiful*day. It would be fully kitted out with white drapes*and a polished wooden floor, not too many flowers*but enough to satisfy Lili’s wants. All his friends*from the war would be there, or all that were left*many had been murdered by those careless
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imperialists. There would be empty seats to*commemorate his fallen comrades properly. His*bride would wear a beautiful twenty-two karat rose-gold ring that he himself would craft, it would be*home to an opal, her favourite. As the day rode on*the guests would leave and the two would sit and*listen to a string quartet and watch the sunset until*she fell asleep on his chest. Their lives would draw*to a close happily.
August 31st marked the day Lili had ventured into*Germany for work. Or so he thought. In reality, she*had been kidnapped by the SA and was being*inducted into the SS. She had been brutally beaten,*cut, slashed, shot at and stabbed by the black*uniforms that took her. This kidnapping was not*however as perfect as they had hoped, the bed*sheets had been covered in crimson, the walls had*been scratched and paint was peeling as a result of*it, the bed sheets had been strewn on the floor and*pillows on the cabinets. Their cupboard had been*knocked over in the tassel and clothes and slats*were all over the floor. A chair had been dismantled*and used to beat her. Their lamp: smashed, glass*littered the floor and most of the pieces wore blood.*The men that took her had left a picture of them*holding her, knife to the neck and gun pointed at*her chest. The picture featured many deep slices on*her body and a stream of pain ran down her ripped*shirt, and seemingly thousands of bruises covered*her body. A picture on the wall had been smashed*and the walls had “Heil Hitler” graffitied on them.
Levi, missing any sign from his wife waiting on the*driveway, burst through the doors. Sprinted up the*stairs whilst also trying to not make too many
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creaks or noises in case they had been found. He felt*around the floor for a few seconds before finding a*crevice, he pulled up the satin carpet and found a*small box, he opened it with caution and pulled out*his Luger P08 and made a light tug on the firing pin.*He also pulled a stick grenade, he had kept from the*war, out of the box and readied it. The door*slammed open, and he thundered through, gun at*his hips side, stick in the other hand. Looking*around at his demolished room, he pieced together*the events that had ensued.
“Nazi *******s, they will ******* die when I find*her” he muttered. No more words held the capability*to be formed when he found the photo.
September 1st,*1939
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Levi went through the next day normally.
He awoke at 6 o’ clock on the dot and stayed there*for the next ten minutes reminiscing on how his day*would be used. He knew this non-Lili routine very*well as she was not always there when he woke up,*Levi poured some water onto his face, soaking his*bed in the process. He, today, had to use all his*might just to push himself up and out of their warm,*cozy bed. He struggled over to his door to grab a*towel to dry his face before going to the bathroom to*shower and brush his not-so-pearly whites. After*this he trudged over to his wardrobe to grab his*finest suit, this, however, did not include a waistcoat*today as his just so happened to be stained red. Levi*flung open his door and forced himself to put a bit of*hop into his stride in hopes that it would increase*his mood. Skipping breakfast was the only viable*option today, being late did not sit well with his*boss. He opened the doors to his brand-new*Volkswagen and randomly spun the radio knob, it*landed on a frequency he had not heard before, after*a minute of trying to fine tune the song, “Lili*Marlene” was able to be recognised. He hummed the*songs all the way to the office. Levi arrived around*6:45. Having had set up his desk for the day, Levi*had forgotten about his meeting with a new client,*Levi worked for*Becker and Becker Law firm. By*lunch Levi had been able to brush the last nights*events from his mind because of the 4 meetings he*had somehow endured. * * * * * * *
By the time he had finished work and driven home,*the SS had returned a scarred and beaten Lili. Levi,*still somewhat scared of who could be in his house,*stumbled through the front door and as soon as he
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walked in, his eyes flooded and he broke down on*the spot. He trekked up the stairs, but noticed his*door was slightly ajar. This was unusual as he was*sure he had closed it when he left for work that*morning. He had forgotten to put his pistol back*into the lock box last night as well as his grenade so*he had no protection. He showing no signs of fear*bounded into the room and started shouting*whatever noises he could make. His vain effort*however came to no avail as there was no intruders*in his home at all. Instead his soon to be fiancé was*sat on their bed pondering over the events that she*had been through. Lili’s head snapped to the side*almost robotically. *
Her face: scarred with fear, her hair had more*dandruff than normal, the roots * with blood. Her*hair had also been cut to shoulder length. Her eyes*didn’t look at Levi but looked as if they looked*through him, he had read upon the thousand-yard*stare and symptoms of PTSD, but he never really*bought into it. Her left ear had a chunk missing,*probably from the initial assault and her nose,*greasy and had bite marks on. There was, on one of*her wrists the number “3-1-2-2-7”. Her lips had been*cut and one of them was stained with blood, the*other had a scarring slice.
She had covered herself with their silk duvet so he*could not see her clothes but he presumed they were*the same as in the picture he had found the night*before.
“Hey,” she murmured not diverting her gaze from*him for even a split second “come lay down, you look*uneasy”
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“Where did you disappear to last night?” Levi*questioned with a perplexed expression.
“I don’t know what you are talking about, I told you,*I went on a work trip.”
“So, what is this then?” Levi pulled up the picture of*her and the men in black uniform.
“Oh, I- I can explain” she started, cheeks red, eyes*darting around the room as if she was looking for an*escape.
“Please do.”
Lili looked around for a few more seconds before*sighing and explained “Look, they found us, but I*have made it better, I said I would join them in*exchange for our lives…”
“Lil-”
“Look, our lives may change but at least we are*safe.”
“Yeah, I guess you are right,” he chuckled “as*always.”
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AUGUST 31ST*1952
As the first light of dawn crept in to the damp*barracks, a fleeting wave of morning hope brushed*against the harsh reality of their unchanging fate,*reminding them that even is this darkness, the mere*act of surviving was a defiant act of its own. Levi*had to make sure he was up before guards annexed*their compounds; this was so that Lili could deliver*his care package that was his extra portions. *
The barracks had been transformed into a shithole*even compared to the 1940’s standards, this was one*of Fuhrer Heinrich Himmler's adjustments. The new*models comprised of small apple boxes and war-torn*pig troughs as their desks, the area Levi resided in*had an apple box with a few bones and severed body
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parts on; every comrade who died here was*commemorated somehow. The walls had no colour,*except for the occasional dot of blood, the western*wall was home to a single window and one painting*of the Fuhrer. The most northern wall housed an*automatic door. The door was glass, Levi and his cell*mates had no privacy; no basic rights for that*matter. The eastern wall displayed... Nothing, the*eastern and southern walls were completely*whitewashed, no blood, no scratches, not even a*stain, this came as a result of the Kapo’s cell*immediately southbound and the Tätowierer*immediately eastbound. The bunks were the size of*floorboards yet homed 6-7 people Levi personally*slept on the floor. The flooring and ceiling were both*flat, white with a star of David encompassed by a*General Prohibit Sign, this was the strongest and*most obvious form of antisemitism in the cell. *
Levi awoke feeling more starved than the day*before, this, he found, was a common theme.