Making closer friends

I'm not super outgoing and don't have anyone close I speak to or see on a regular basis, only a handful of people I see from a society. I tried texting them and it's like pulling teeth. I live on a busy road and every night hearing all the people outside having fun makes me feel a bit left out. How do I get more sociable like everyone and make the most out of uni?

Reply 1

FraserKMC

5

Why is texting them like pulling teeth? Is it a pain to get them to respond or?

Reply 2

user2456532

OP

10

Original post by FraserKMC

Why is texting them like pulling teeth? Is it a pain to get them to respond or?

Some take over a day to reply, with the rest there isn't enough going on between us to keep it going. They'd reply and it'd end with pleasantries like oh yeah cool which is just sort of the end of it.

Original post by user2456532

I'm not super outgoing and don't have anyone close I speak to or see on a regular basis, only a handful of people I see from a society. I tried texting them and it's like pulling teeth. I live on a busy road and every night hearing all the people outside having fun makes me feel a bit left out. How do I get more sociable like everyone and make the most out of uni?

Hi,

I totally understand how you feel - often I felt the same way at uni as well! I always usually recommend that going regularly to societies helps - but perhaps if the society you're attending attracts people who aren't too sociable, that might be a reason. I've experienced this as well! I've found that unfortunately some societies aren't the best for making friends.

Have you thought about trying out a different society or looking at more societies? I find that activity/hobby related societies are the best places to make friends! It might be worth picking up a new hobby and hopefully making friends that way :smile:

~ Fatiha, Cardiff University Student Rep

(edited 1 month ago)

Reply 4

user2456532

OP

10

Original post by CardiffUni Rep 2

Hi,
I totally understand how you feel - often I felt the same way at uni as well! I always usually recommend that going regularly to societies helps - but perhaps if the society you're attending attracts people who aren't too sociable, that might be a reason. I've experienced this as well! I've found that unfortunately some societies aren't the best for making friends.
Have you thought about trying out a different society or looking at more societies? I find that activity/hobby related societies are the best places to make friends! It might be worth picking up a new hobby and hopefully making friends that way :smile:

~ Fatiha, Cardiff University Student Rep

I do think most people in the societies are quite outgoing, they seem to have many friends and do stuff all the time. I stopped going to ones that were dead or I wasn't into, especially the sports ones since I just joined for the socials and shied away at training. I enjoy the events I go to now at least but most people either come with their friends and see it as a side thing, or just seem to be preoccupied with their lives. I'll see if there's anything new I want to try at the freshers fair though.

Original post by user2456532

I'm not super outgoing and don't have anyone close I speak to or see on a regular basis, only a handful of people I see from a society. I tried texting them and it's like pulling teeth. I live on a busy road and every night hearing all the people outside having fun makes me feel a bit left out. How do I get more sociable like everyone and make the most out of uni?

Hi,

Its understandable that may feel annoyed or upset, that your friends from societies are not replying fast, especially when you can hear others out and about! Have you thought about joining another society this year? I joined a society in my 2nd year and made some really good friends through it, and was on the committee for the next couple of years. It definitely helped with my confidence and being able to socialise with others on a regular basis. It could be something you have never tried before. I had joined the mountaineering society and there was quite a few of us who were complete beginners, and also had fear of heights, like me. So don't let not having any experience with the sort of activity a society does put you of it, if it interests you.

Have you thought about becoming a student ambassador? Most universities hire in and around September/October time. I have found being a student ambassador has really helped my confidence, as well as making friends through it , which has overall made me feel more involved with things going on campus. Normally student ambassador are paid fairly well, which is always a plus, and you can work around your lectures and seminars as well.

Suzan - Student Ambassador 🙂
(MSc Criminology student)

Original post by user2456532

I'm not super outgoing and don't have anyone close I speak to or see on a regular basis, only a handful of people I see from a society. I tried texting them and it's like pulling teeth. I live on a busy road and every night hearing all the people outside having fun makes me feel a bit left out. How do I get more sociable like everyone and make the most out of uni?

Hi

I find the best way to make friends at Uni is to join lots of different societies and clubs as they will contain lots of different people that have similar interests to you.

In addition to this, try seeing if a few people from your lectures would want to grab a coffee or a drink after one of your lectures this can be another way to make closer friendships.

I hope this helps,

Matt
Wrexham Uni Reps

Reply 7

Wired_1800

20

Original post by user2456532

I'm not super outgoing and don't have anyone close I speak to or see on a regular basis, only a handful of people I see from a society. I tried texting them and it's like pulling teeth. I live on a busy road and every night hearing all the people outside having fun makes me feel a bit left out. How do I get more sociable like everyone and make the most out of uni?

You should consider having friends from different parts of your life such as sports/society, your course and then from back home.

The key to having close friends is regular and consistent contact. You have a group chat and keep in touch with them.

Making closer friends

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