parents want my sfe

we were talking about how i might budget but then they said that they would prefer if i sent them all my money so they could budget my weeks for me?? i thought that was absolutely crazy and then my mom cracked and said she wanted it so she could pay off her credit. then they turned it on me blaming me for not thinking of even giving them my money in the first place 😓 theyre both mad at me and i still have a few days until i move away so what should i do 😞

Reply 1

Muttly

20

Always a positive. At least you know you can't go back to them if you do run out of money! So budget like you have no money at all, and think three or four times before you spend even a £1 - Do I need it, do I really need it? If I don't spend it right now what's the worst that can happen?

Hold tight, Let the rift go. - Stay in touch and do very well when you study. Keep your money safe and don't lend it - ever

Reply 2

TobyPotatoe

5

Original post by Anonymous

we were talking about how i might budget but then they said that they would prefer if i sent them all my money so they could budget my weeks for me?? i thought that was absolutely crazy and then my mom cracked and said she wanted it so she could pay off her credit. then they turned it on me blaming me for not thinking of even giving them my money in the first place 😓 theyre both mad at me and i still have a few days until i move away so what should i do 😞

I'm so sorry to hear about your situation. It's an added stress not needed at an already hectic time and unfortunately the people who should be supporting you have failed. Firstly do not give your parents a penny you will need that money to cover your living cost while studying and at the moment the cost of living is high. This might mean you have reduced contact with your parents so they cannot guilt you into giving them your money. This might feel like a hard one to do but ultimately you will meet people and make friends meaning you feel less isolated. To help you social i would join a club based around one of your passions. Once at university I would seek advice help and support on the matter. I've unfortunately do not now where to direct you for external help and support regarding this type of matter but ultimately i think it is best to speak to a professional within the university setting once you get there. Congratulations on your achievement I hope this next step in life will help you truly grow into yourself all the best.

Reply 3

StriderHort

21

"Give us all your money so we can 'budget' it for you"

"No don't be preposterous, you can't even budget your own money"

Reply 4

Cotes1

12

Good advice above.

As a parent, I just don't understand this.

Your parents need debt advice.

Original post by Anonymous

we were talking about how i might budget but then they said that they would prefer if i sent them all my money so they could budget my weeks for me?? i thought that was absolutely crazy and then my mom cracked and said she wanted it so she could pay off her credit. then they turned it on me blaming me for not thinking of even giving them my money in the first place 😓 theyre both mad at me and i still have a few days until i move away so what should i do 😞

Hi,

I would recommend that you do not give your parents your money. This your money to live off, not theirs. You could explain to your parents that this is your money and just like all other students in the UK, will be paying the loan back, once you earn over a certain amount in the future. You could also mention that managing your own money and budgeting is part of being a university student, and you will gain life skills through this.

You might have a difficult few days with your parents before you move to university, but, it would be a lot worse if your parents didn't give your money loan back to you, and you were unable to afford food, rent etc whilst at university. There will be support teams around at university, who will be able to support you, if you needed/wanted.

Good luck
Suzan - Student Ambassador 🙂
(MSc Criminology student)

Reply 6

StriderHort

21

Original post by YSJstudents

Hi,
I would recommend that you do not give your parents your money. This your money to live off, not theirs. You could explain to your parents that this is your money and just like all other students in the UK, will be paying the loan back, once you earn over a certain amount in the future. You could also mention that managing your own money and budgeting is part of being a university student, and you will gain life skills through this.
You might have a difficult few days with your parents before you move to university, but, it would be a lot worse if your parents didn't give your money loan back to you, and you were unable to afford food, rent etc whilst at university. There will be support teams around at university, who will be able to support you, if you needed/wanted.
Good luck
Suzan - Student Ambassador 🙂
(MSc Criminology student)

Tbh why bother trying to to explain anything about budgeting or your needs to them?, we know it's nothing really to do with that and they just want the money themselves, it's a time to just say 'No' imo

Reply 7

Maria Guilherme

2

Original post by Anonymous

we were talking about how i might budget but then they said that they would prefer if i sent them all my money so they could budget my weeks for me?? i thought that was absolutely crazy and then my mom cracked and said she wanted it so she could pay off her credit. then they turned it on me blaming me for not thinking of even giving them my money in the first place 😓 theyre both mad at me and i still have a few days until i move away so what should i do 😞

If you give all your sfe to your parents so they can pay their debts how will they help you through your education?
It’s fine helping your parents but you must help yourself first.Student life is not easy.

parents want my sfe

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