Help! Should I stay or go?

I’m currently in a massive dilemma which has to be solved in 3 days.
It’s either I stay at my grammar school or leave and go to my old sixth form with all my friends and a much better support system.
I’m going to do a pros/ cons list.

OLD sixth form:
Pros:
-I have a bunch of friends there who I love and appreciate
-I have a good relationship with my teachers
-I overall would feel a lot happier there

Cons:
-my mum would literally cut me off financially (not joking)
-it’s a ‘state’ school, so apparently that’s not great according to my mum

New sixth form:
Pros:
-it’s a grammar and has some pretty great opportunities on hand
-very STEM based which I want to get into
-has extra personal statement- building activities.

Cons:
-over the past week I’ve felt very out of place there
-I have little to no friends I can truly connect with.

I just don’t know. I get it’s only been a week at my new school but I’m worried I won’t make any friends+ it will stay that way throughout the year. It’s been affecting me mentally as I’ve had very little motivation to do revision already in year 12.
I feel very torn, I don’t trust myself to make a decision in case I regret it later.

Reply 1

m4riammmm

Original post

by Cozzymic

I’m currently in a massive dilemma which has to be solved in 3 days.
It’s either I stay at my grammar school or leave and go to my old sixth form with all my friends and a much better support system.
I’m going to do a pros/ cons list.
OLD sixth form:
Pros:
-I have a bunch of friends there who I love and appreciate
-I have a good relationship with my teachers
-I overall would feel a lot happier there
Cons:
-my mum would literally cut me off financially (not joking)
-it’s a ‘state’ school, so apparently that’s not great according to my mum
New sixth form:
Pros:
-it’s a grammar and has some pretty great opportunities on hand
-very STEM based which I want to get into
-has extra personal statement- building activities.
Cons:
-over the past week I’ve felt very out of place there
-I have little to no friends I can truly connect with.
I just don’t know. I get it’s only been a week at my new school but I’m worried I won’t make any friends+ it will stay that way throughout the year. It’s been affecting me mentally as I’ve had very little motivation to do revision already in year 12.
I feel very torn, I don’t trust myself to make a decision in case I regret it later.

hey I don't wanna be one of those soppy people who tell you to go with your heart and then you make a decision that you regret later. if your mum will cut you off financially would there still be a way for you to help provide for yourself ie getting a job or bursaries? or perhaps your mum is only threatening you with that to ensure you stay at the grammar school. I think grammar school is a privilege many of us, myself included, would've loved to go to so perhaps your mum is wanting to do that for you. from what ive gathered you seem new to the school and tbh the start of anything new can always be a rocky road until you settle in. us humans crave what we are used to for we are comfortable doing it. you can always keep in contact with your old friends and arrange study dates at libraries etc so you won't forget about them, life is kinda like that anyways when we all depart from uni and leave our sixth form friends but stay in touch. as selfish as it sounds you should do what's best for your future self bc you'll thank yourself later. many opportunities may brush by and you'll only regret not taking them. I think you should give it a chance to settle in think back to joining sixth form in the first place and meeting new people its the same. if this grammar school will help better prepare you and provide you with the best possible chance to enter your stem based career then I think you'd be a fool to let this opportunity pass by. then again I'm just a random stranger online I can't tell you what's best for you, only you will know that

Reply 2

Maximum-tragedy

Also I find that it does take a few weeks to develop friendships in a new environment - also are you sure you've been trying? Not to be offensive but if you are already decided on your old 6th form you might be subconsciously giving up but 🤷*♀️
Also what I always like to think is that if you're clever, you will be clever anywhere - one might give you more support but if you don't enjoy it, you won't try so really just do what feels best <3