Struggling at uni of reading

Just started my first year at uni and am struggling. I am so lonely and sad all of the time. I’m homesick and really am not interested in my course at all to the point I am still looking for full time jobs so I can leave. What do I do?

Reply 1

BCU Student Rep

Official Rep

Original post

by Anonymous

Hi there,

Sorry to hear you're not having the best time so far.

It's quite normal to feel some doubts and homesickness when you first start, as moving to uni can be such a big change. But time can really be a healer with this, and getting more comfortable with your new space can help you feel more at home. Is there anything in particular that's making you feel this way?

I do also understand that sometimes you can have an intuitive feeling that something isn't right, and that's okay too. Is there anyone at your uni that you can talk about your concerns with? Maybe a tutor, or some student support services? It might help to look at your options before you make any big decisions, and maybe someone at your uni can offer an alternative way to help you out.

I think the main thing here is to not rush, which right now probably seems like the last thing you want to hear. I know when I first moved to uni, I felt a bit down in the first couple of weeks as I found it difficult to gel with some of my flat mates. At the time, it felt like I'd failed at my new start as I hadn't made the friendships I thought I would have. But once I started to get into my course and focus on other things, I found new students who I got on with better, and I began to feel more comfortable.

I also know how rubbish homesickness can make you feel. To be honest, I'm in my final year now and I still feel a bit homesick - especially after spending the summer at home. But I try to focus on my course, push myself to go out and explore the city, and keep regular contact with friends and family back home. And I always find that getting myself into a routine helps distract from feeling lonely.

What is it about your course that you're not enjoying? Things may change throughout the year and start to improve. But also like I've said, it's completely valid to feel the way you are - can you talk to your tutors about it? Again, before you make any major decisions, I would see if there's anyone or any other options that could help.

I hope things start to pick up for you. 🙂
Emily
Student Rep at BCU

Reply 2

Lita James

Have you thought about taking a fresh look at the clubs and activities at the SU that would make you happy. It could be a simple weekly book club or a volley ball game you join in with. You don’t have to be at Uni all the time. There are some fun things to check out away from the Uni. Maybe you could start volunteering at the theatre or help a charity. Perhaps a weekend job would make you feel like you have more options. If your course isn’t exactly what you want think about how it could be useful for you in a few years time. Go easy on yourself and give it time. I wish you so many happy smiles - customise the experience and chat to lots of different people to find your own vibe.

Reply 3

StaticSkull

Hiii I'm a first year at the uni what course u on?

Reply 4

hallamstudents

Official Rep

Original post

by Anonymous

Hi there,

I am really sorry to hear that you have been feeling this way at uni. It can be really hard when you are struggling and feeling homesick, and I know how you feel.

In terms of not being interested in your course, have you spoken to your uni about how you are feeling? If you have an academic advisor or personal tutor, they are usually good people to speak to about this as they will be able to talk it through with you and see if there is anything they can help with to make it seem any better. If it is something you are struggling with which is making the course not enjoyable, they will be able to help you understand this and see if this helps you at all.

I would also recommend maybe talking to someone at uni about transferring courses, if you want to stay at uni but just not on your course. There may be other courses you like the sound of better. It's worth looking anyway as you may be able to transfer onto second year if you get a certain grade in your first year.

Talking to the careers team may help too - they may be able to suggest what else you could do, e.g. degree apprenticeship. Or, they can talk you through what you can do with your course as this may encourage you to stick with it!

I always say to make sure you are talking to the well-being team if you are struggling. They are there to help you and will be able to listen to how you are feeling and try and com up with a solution with you to help you out.

With being lonely, I thought I could give you some of my tips for how to make some new friends at university as it can sometimes be hard to meet new people but this is how I have met people and made friends at uni:

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Joining a society. This is a great way of meeting lots of new people and doing something you enjoy at the same time. There are usually lots to choose from so have a look and see if there are any that you like the sound of. They give you something to do as well, and get you out of the house!

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See if your student union puts any events on. Often the SU will put lots of great events on for students where you can meet lots of new people and do something fun at the same time! Have a look as they are quite good and you can meet people this way.

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Have a look on social media as you can often meet people this way. There will usually be groups on Facebook for your course, your halls and your uni in general so this may be worth looking at as you will meet some people by doing this.