The Student Room Group

how to stand up to bullies?

i need help with this as i got told i need to stand up for myself but tbh i have no idea how as i hate the idea of hurting others
and in class if i do, the teacher may think im being mean and get into trouble
Original post by luvsunsets
i need help with this as i got told i need to stand up for myself but tbh i have no idea how as i hate the idea of hurting others
and in class if i do, the teacher may think im being mean and get into trouble

I completely understand how you feel. Standing up for yourself can be really challenging, especially when you care about others’ feelings. It’s important to express yourself without being hurtful.
One approach could be to use “I” statements, like “I feel uncomfortable when…” This way, you’re sharing your feelings without blaming anyone. Also, practicing what you want to say with a friend can help build your confidence.
Remember, standing up for yourself doesn’t mean being mean; it means valuing your own feelings. You deserve to be heard, and it’s okay to express your needs respectfully. If the teacher sees you’re being honest and respectful, they’re more likely to understand. You’ve got this
Original post by behram527
I completely understand how you feel. Standing up for yourself can be really challenging, especially when you care about others’ feelings. It’s important to express yourself without being hurtful.
One approach could be to use “I” statements, like “I feel uncomfortable when…” This way, you’re sharing your feelings without blaming anyone. Also, practicing what you want to say with a friend can help build your confidence.
Remember, standing up for yourself doesn’t mean being mean; it means valuing your own feelings. You deserve to be heard, and it’s okay to express your needs respectfully. If the teacher sees you’re being honest and respectful, they’re more likely to understand. You’ve got this
i honestly dont think that teachers believe me i get hurt easily as im sensitive and i try to show im hurt and that im not the bully but tbh cause im muslim they hate me and choose other ppls side and make me in trouble
like once someone lied abt me saying i did something i didnt and then the teacher being similar to her believed her, not letting me say my side of the story and threatening me to call my parents and i couldnt say anything back to the teacher or to her as we're friends, the teacher honestly took her side and i felt betrayed

everyone in the class was staring at me and i felt like crying but i couldnt as i knew how to hold back tears

Original post by luvsunsets
i honestly dont think that teachers believe me i get hurt easily as im sensitive and i try to show im hurt and that im not the bully but tbh cause im muslim they hate me and choose other ppls side and make me in trouble
like once someone lied abt me saying i did something i didnt and then the teacher being similar to her believed her, not letting me say my side of the story and threatening me to call my parents and i couldnt say anything back to the teacher or to her as we're friends, the teacher honestly took her side and i felt betrayed

everyone in the class was staring at me and i felt like crying but i couldnt as i knew how to hold back tears


I’m really sorry to hear that you’re going through this. It’s incredibly tough to feel unsupported, especially when you’re just trying to express yourself. It sounds like you’ve had some very frustrating experiences, and it’s understandable to feel hurt and betrayed.
Remember, your feelings are valid, and it’s okay to express them. It might help to talk to someone you trust about what’s happening—whether it’s a different teacher, a counselor, or a family member. They can offer support and maybe even help you address the situation.
Try to focus on your strengths and the good qualities you have. Being sensitive is a strength, not a weakness, and it shows you care deeply. You deserve to be treated with respect and fairness. Hang in there, and know that you’re not alone in this
Original post by behram527
I’m really sorry to hear that you’re going through this. It’s incredibly tough to feel unsupported, especially when you’re just trying to express yourself. It sounds like you’ve had some very frustrating experiences, and it’s understandable to feel hurt and betrayed.
Remember, your feelings are valid, and it’s okay to express them. It might help to talk to someone you trust about what’s happening—whether it’s a different teacher, a counselor, or a family member. They can offer support and maybe even help you address the situation.
Try to focus on your strengths and the good qualities you have. Being sensitive is a strength, not a weakness, and it shows you care deeply. You deserve to be treated with respect and fairness. Hang in there, and know that you’re not alone in this
thanks but i have been suffering in silence and dont feel comfortable with speaking to ppl as it makes me feel like a bad person
Go to the police. Any sniff of legal action and the school will do whatever they can to save their rep.
Original post by Guru Jason
Go to the police. Any sniff of legal action and the school will do whatever they can to save their rep.
yh well i dont think the school cares tbh
i mean they believe the bullies whenever i try to say what happened
i feel cause im a muslim that they racially discriminate me

they wouldn't really help

i cant call the police as i left the school and remember evey bad things i experienced

and i dont want them to hate me or threaten me

Original post by luvsunsets
yh well i dont think the school cares tbh
i mean they believe the bullies whenever i try to say what happened
i feel cause im a muslim that they racially discriminate me

they wouldn't really help

i cant call the police as i left the school and remember evey bad things i experienced

and i dont want them to hate me or threaten me


Wait. Are you or are you not in education. Of you are not, then you are no longer with the bullies. If you are then get the policen involved. No educational institution want a black mark on their record.
Original post by Guru Jason
Wait. Are you or are you not in education. Of you are not, then you are no longer with the bullies. If you are then get the policen involved. No educational institution want a black mark on their record.
i am in education but in a different place + i know it is best to do that but i cant cause of the inspectors OFSTED
we get told 'be on your best behaviour cause they are coming to anyone....' it is really hard when i had to stay silent + if i did tell them the teacher would be mad at me for telling them
since i left a few yrs ago i got told to jst leave it and move on
also i see them in public and honestly for some reason
i get really anxious they may attack me even when they arent in school
Original post by Guru Jason
Wait. Are you or are you not in education. Of you are not, then you are no longer with the bullies. If you are then get the policen involved. No educational institution want a black mark on their record.

you only call the police when there something is happening such at school and i dont think they would actually want to help cause their could be something that they would do

and the school gets away with it anyways

Sorry if I am discouraging, I tried standing up for myself and it only made things worse. If you are really alone in this, nothing can stop them. You have to have a group of people by your side to show power. Bullies usually don't care for the actions teachers can do and unless they are guarantee to be arrested police is not really a better choice either. Sorry.
Original post by luvsunsets
thanks but i have been suffering in silence and dont feel comfortable with speaking to ppl as it makes me feel like a bad person

I'm really sorry to hear you're feeling this way, but please remember that reaching out for help doesn't make you a bad person. You're just going through a tough time, and talking to someone can make things easier. Everyone needs support sometimes

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