Feeling overwhelmed jobs, eating disorders, financial insecurity, social insolation

Had a student ambassador assessment today and just kind of felt like I may have messed it up. It was a bit difficult for me also because due to financial issues I haven’t had a lot of face to face interaction. So to even do this event was a big deal for me. I was a bit nervous and timid but over time I started to climb out of my shell. As while I can’t afford face to face social activities I do a lot more virtual ones which helped. Anyway, I just at times felt like I was the odd one out. There were these group of girls that had the kind of were the popular kids kind of vibe. They were younger than me. But it reminded me of what I was that age which wasn’t that long ago and how I used to feel being around girls like that so it was a bit triggering. Luckily rather than trying to fit in, I knew myself a lot better and decided I wasn’t going to be a pretzel and instead I just sat with other people.
Then I had a support group for my eating disorder and the host intervened as she thought some of my suggestions were a bit too specific. Which is really hard because there are so many rules and guidelines for this group that it’s easy to contravene them by accident. But I just felt like it was another knock to my mental health.
Then I attended this online event on mooting and the entire time I just felt ignored because my chat function wasn’t working and I was having to ask questions using the q&a function instead to which none of the hosts were addressing and everyone in the chat was getting their questions answers. I even tried putting my hand up and because only admins could unmute speakers I couldn’t even unmute myself to speak. Luckily someone in the chat mentioned I was asking questions in the q&a section but it just got to the point that I just kind of gave up. Because I just felt so ignored and the hosts were not even addressing my questions.

Had a student ambassador assessment today and just kind of felt like I may have messed it up. It was a bit difficult for me also because due to financial issues I haven’t had a lot of face to face interaction. So to even do this event was a big deal for me. I was a bit nervous and timid but over time I started to climb out of my shell. As while I can’t afford face to face social activities I do a lot more virtual ones which helped. Anyway, I just at times felt like I was the odd one out. There were these group of girls that had the kind of were the popular kids kind of vibe. They were younger than me. But it reminded me of what I was that age which wasn’t that long ago and how I used to feel being around girls like that so it was a bit triggering. Luckily rather than trying to fit in, I knew myself a lot better and decided I wasn’t going to be a pretzel and instead I just sat with other people.
Then I had a support group for my eating disorder and the host intervened as she thought some of my suggestions were a bit too specific. Which is really hard because there are so many rules and guidelines for this group that it’s easy to contravene them by accident. But I just felt like it was another knock to my mental health.
Then I attended this online event on mooting and the entire time I just felt ignored because my chat function wasn’t working and I was having to ask questions using the q&a function instead to which none of the hosts were addressing and everyone in the chat was getting their questions answers. I even tried putting my hand up and because only admins could unmute speakers I couldn’t even unmute myself to speak. Luckily someone in the chat mentioned I was asking questions in the q&a section but it just got to the point that I just kind of gave up. Because I just felt so ignored and the hosts were not even addressing my questions.