How do you make friends in uni as an introvert
Im going to uni next year and im introverted and pretty bad at socialising so im scared im not gonna make any friends. Im not a fan of the clubbing/drinking culture which i feel like everyone else will do and ill be some outcast. I don’t wanna be friendless for three years at uni. Any advice?
Original post by Mari8901
Im going to uni next year and im introverted and pretty bad at socialising so im scared im not gonna make any friends. Im not a fan of the clubbing/drinking culture which i feel like everyone else will do and ill be some outcast. I don’t wanna be friendless for three years at uni. Any advice?
Hello @Mari8901 🙂
Firstly, it's great you're thinking of going to university, it can be both an exciting and anxious time!
There's many ways you can make friends at university, and most won't include drinking. Remember most people will be in the same boat so please try not to stress about it!
The first is accommodation. If you're staying in your university's accommodation, you're bound to meet people who have similar interest as you. Many people find that their flatmates often tend to be some their closest friends during and after university!
The second way is simply meeting people who are on the same course as you. For example during smaller teaching hours such as workshops (and labs if you're doing a STEM degree). This is how I met most of my friends because in lectures with ~200 people it can seem intimidating to talk to people, but smaller groups offer a more relaxed atmosphere.
The third is to join a club or society! This is where you get to meet people who enjoy the same hobbies/sports as you. Societies will often arrange meet-ups where everyone can just get to know one another and have a fun time. Usually you can even request activities to do, so you'll definitely find some that are non-drinking!
I hope this helps! Please don't hesitate to ask questions if you have any!
I wish you the best at university! 🙂
Fatma
Natural Sciences student.
(edited 5 days ago)
Original post by Mari8901
Im going to uni next year and im introverted and pretty bad at socialising so im scared im not gonna make any friends. Im not a fan of the clubbing/drinking culture which i feel like everyone else will do and ill be some outcast. I don’t wanna be friendless for three years at uni. Any advice?
Hi there,
I felt the same way before I came to university. I was very introverted, not interested in clubbing or drinking, and was quite inexperienced in making new friends.
However, it wasn't as difficult as I thought it would be! While it can be challenging, try to keep an open mind in the first few weeks. Keeping your door open or leaving out snacks for everyone in your accommodation is a great way to get yourself known when you first move in. If you're nervous about approaching people, a little eye contact and a smile might encourage them to approach you instead! Some university accommodations also have group chats that you can join beforehand, so keep an eye out for these too.
A lot of university will be trying new things, which can be really scary. I'd highly recommend you attend as much of the university-hosted events as you can, such as the fairs, movie/game nights, and socializing activities. Not only are these activities a good place to make friends, but they are also great to learn a little more about what your university and local area can offer you.
If this sounds really daunting right now, you might want to consider trying out some solo activities between now and then? Maybe sign up to volunteer locally, go to a Christmas market or go to the movies? I find that doing things alone really boosts my confidence, and I even challenge myself to make small talk. It may sound silly, but it really helps!
I think it is also important to remind yourself that not everyone is interested in clubbing and drinking, and so many people are incredibly nervous about making friends. You aren't alone. Many people joining have the same concerns as you, and many of us are on the other end of that now! Asking for advice is a great place to start, but also have some faith in your abilities to start this exciting new chapter - you will be brilliant! 🙂
Best of luck,
Isabella
Fourth-Year Geography with a Year Abroad Student
(edited 4 days ago)
Original post by Chester Student
Hi there,
I felt the same way before I came to university. I was very introverted, not interested in clubbing or drinking, and was quite inexperienced in making new friends.
However, it wasn't as difficult as I thought it would be! While it can be challenging, try to keep an open mind in the first few weeks. Keeping your door open or leaving out snacks for everyone in your accommodation is a great way to get yourself known when you first move in. If you're nervous about approaching people, a little eye contact and a smile might encourage them to approach you instead! Some university accommodations also have group chats that you can join beforehand, so keep an eye out for these too.
A lot of university will be trying new things, which can be really scary. I'd highly recommend you attend as much of the university-hosted events as you can, such as the fairs, movie/game nights, and socializing activities. Not only are these activities a good place to make friends, but they are also great to learn a little more about what your university and local area can offer you.
If this sounds really daunting right now, you might want to consider trying out some solo activities between now and then? Maybe sign up to volunteer locally, go to a Christmas market or go to the movies? I find that doing things alone really boosts my confidence, and I even challenge myself to make small talk. It may sound silly, but it really helps!
I think it is also important to remind yourself that not everyone is interested in clubbing and drinking, and so many people are incredibly nervous about making friends. You aren't alone. Many people joining have the same concerns as you, and many of us are on the other end of that now! Asking for advice is a great place to start, but also have some faith in your abilities to start this exciting new chapter - you will be brilliant! 🙂
Best of luck,
Isabella
Fourth-Year Geography with a Year Abroad Student
I felt the same way before I came to university. I was very introverted, not interested in clubbing or drinking, and was quite inexperienced in making new friends.
However, it wasn't as difficult as I thought it would be! While it can be challenging, try to keep an open mind in the first few weeks. Keeping your door open or leaving out snacks for everyone in your accommodation is a great way to get yourself known when you first move in. If you're nervous about approaching people, a little eye contact and a smile might encourage them to approach you instead! Some university accommodations also have group chats that you can join beforehand, so keep an eye out for these too.
A lot of university will be trying new things, which can be really scary. I'd highly recommend you attend as much of the university-hosted events as you can, such as the fairs, movie/game nights, and socializing activities. Not only are these activities a good place to make friends, but they are also great to learn a little more about what your university and local area can offer you.
If this sounds really daunting right now, you might want to consider trying out some solo activities between now and then? Maybe sign up to volunteer locally, go to a Christmas market or go to the movies? I find that doing things alone really boosts my confidence, and I even challenge myself to make small talk. It may sound silly, but it really helps!
I think it is also important to remind yourself that not everyone is interested in clubbing and drinking, and so many people are incredibly nervous about making friends. You aren't alone. Many people joining have the same concerns as you, and many of us are on the other end of that now! Asking for advice is a great place to start, but also have some faith in your abilities to start this exciting new chapter - you will be brilliant! 🙂
Best of luck,
Isabella
Fourth-Year Geography with a Year Abroad Student
Thank you for your help! Ill try and have a better mindset
Original post by Mari8901
Im going to uni next year and im introverted and pretty bad at socialising so im scared im not gonna make any friends. Im not a fan of the clubbing/drinking culture which i feel like everyone else will do and ill be some outcast. I don’t wanna be friendless for three years at uni. Any advice?
Hi @Mari8901 ,
So many people feel this way before they come to uni so try not to worry too much as you will not be alone in feeling like this. There are so many different ways to make friends at uni so if you don't like going out clubbing or drinking, don't worry as there are so many other ways to meet people and you would be surprised at the amount of people who feel the same as you!
As others have said, your accommodation is a great way of meeting people. You will be put into a flat with a mix of different people that you don't know but you will find that a lot of them will have more in common with you than you might think! You can also sometimes request certain things when you are applying, so you could always ask for a quiet flat as this way you might get put with people who also are not fans of clubbing or drinking. Even if you get put into a flat with people who like going out, it doesn't mean they won't like you and they will be doing lots of other things too which you can get involved with. You can do a games night, or cook together! You will find that most people who go and live in halls are quite friendly as they want to live with other students and make friends, so try and join in with things they are doing which you like the sound of!
Your course is a great way to meet people too. You already have a common interest (the subject you are studying) which can make it easier to start conversations. In freshers week, you will find you are having the same conversations with lots of people - where are you living, how old are you, where are you from etc which can make it easier to talk to people as you have some things you can talk to them about. Try and sit next to new people in your classes and make conversations with them as you will find that lots of people are friendly and will talk to you!
I would also recommend going to any course welcome events that your course is putting on. Lots of people think they are not worth going to and will not go, but you will find that you meet quite a few people this way. I met some of my closest friends at a welcome week event and I found it to be quite a fun way of meeting some people for the first time. I also felt less nervous to start my lectures after this as I knew some of the buildings and some people!
Societies are also great ways of meeting lots of new people and making friends. You will meet so many new people this way and also get to do something fun that you enjoy doing at the same time. Have a look when you start at the freshers fair as there will be lots of societies there which you can think about joining and they often put trial sessions on too so you can try them out and see if you like the sound of any of them! I would really recommend this and you will find people with a similar interest to you. There are societies for everything - at Hallam there are so many sports, academic societies and just general hobbies so I am sure there will be lots at the university you go to.
I also found that social media was a great way of making friends and if you are a bit more introverted, this can often be a slightly easier way of talking to people as it can be less daunting talking to people over social media rather than face to face. You can usually find groups on Facebook and other social media for your uni, your course, your halls etc so have a look and see if you can find any as you can usually start talking to a few people this way which is nice as you know some people when you start.
Have a look what your student union puts on too. They will often put events on that do not involve drinking or clubbing which you might prefer! There may be cinema trips, theatre trips, going out for coffees or other fun activities such as this! So I would recommend looking at this as there might be something you like the sound of and you might meet a lot of people doing this!
I hope some of this helps and good luck with your university journey 🙂
Lucy -SHU student ambassador.
Original post by hallamstudents
Hi @Mari8901 ,
So many people feel this way before they come to uni so try not to worry too much as you will not be alone in feeling like this. There are so many different ways to make friends at uni so if you don't like going out clubbing or drinking, don't worry as there are so many other ways to meet people and you would be surprised at the amount of people who feel the same as you!
As others have said, your accommodation is a great way of meeting people. You will be put into a flat with a mix of different people that you don't know but you will find that a lot of them will have more in common with you than you might think! You can also sometimes request certain things when you are applying, so you could always ask for a quiet flat as this way you might get put with people who also are not fans of clubbing or drinking. Even if you get put into a flat with people who like going out, it doesn't mean they won't like you and they will be doing lots of other things too which you can get involved with. You can do a games night, or cook together! You will find that most people who go and live in halls are quite friendly as they want to live with other students and make friends, so try and join in with things they are doing which you like the sound of!
Your course is a great way to meet people too. You already have a common interest (the subject you are studying) which can make it easier to start conversations. In freshers week, you will find you are having the same conversations with lots of people - where are you living, how old are you, where are you from etc which can make it easier to talk to people as you have some things you can talk to them about. Try and sit next to new people in your classes and make conversations with them as you will find that lots of people are friendly and will talk to you!
I would also recommend going to any course welcome events that your course is putting on. Lots of people think they are not worth going to and will not go, but you will find that you meet quite a few people this way. I met some of my closest friends at a welcome week event and I found it to be quite a fun way of meeting some people for the first time. I also felt less nervous to start my lectures after this as I knew some of the buildings and some people!
Societies are also great ways of meeting lots of new people and making friends. You will meet so many new people this way and also get to do something fun that you enjoy doing at the same time. Have a look when you start at the freshers fair as there will be lots of societies there which you can think about joining and they often put trial sessions on too so you can try them out and see if you like the sound of any of them! I would really recommend this and you will find people with a similar interest to you. There are societies for everything - at Hallam there are so many sports, academic societies and just general hobbies so I am sure there will be lots at the university you go to.
I also found that social media was a great way of making friends and if you are a bit more introverted, this can often be a slightly easier way of talking to people as it can be less daunting talking to people over social media rather than face to face. You can usually find groups on Facebook and other social media for your uni, your course, your halls etc so have a look and see if you can find any as you can usually start talking to a few people this way which is nice as you know some people when you start.
Have a look what your student union puts on too. They will often put events on that do not involve drinking or clubbing which you might prefer! There may be cinema trips, theatre trips, going out for coffees or other fun activities such as this! So I would recommend looking at this as there might be something you like the sound of and you might meet a lot of people doing this!
I hope some of this helps and good luck with your university journey 🙂
Lucy -SHU student ambassador.
So many people feel this way before they come to uni so try not to worry too much as you will not be alone in feeling like this. There are so many different ways to make friends at uni so if you don't like going out clubbing or drinking, don't worry as there are so many other ways to meet people and you would be surprised at the amount of people who feel the same as you!
As others have said, your accommodation is a great way of meeting people. You will be put into a flat with a mix of different people that you don't know but you will find that a lot of them will have more in common with you than you might think! You can also sometimes request certain things when you are applying, so you could always ask for a quiet flat as this way you might get put with people who also are not fans of clubbing or drinking. Even if you get put into a flat with people who like going out, it doesn't mean they won't like you and they will be doing lots of other things too which you can get involved with. You can do a games night, or cook together! You will find that most people who go and live in halls are quite friendly as they want to live with other students and make friends, so try and join in with things they are doing which you like the sound of!
Your course is a great way to meet people too. You already have a common interest (the subject you are studying) which can make it easier to start conversations. In freshers week, you will find you are having the same conversations with lots of people - where are you living, how old are you, where are you from etc which can make it easier to talk to people as you have some things you can talk to them about. Try and sit next to new people in your classes and make conversations with them as you will find that lots of people are friendly and will talk to you!
I would also recommend going to any course welcome events that your course is putting on. Lots of people think they are not worth going to and will not go, but you will find that you meet quite a few people this way. I met some of my closest friends at a welcome week event and I found it to be quite a fun way of meeting some people for the first time. I also felt less nervous to start my lectures after this as I knew some of the buildings and some people!
Societies are also great ways of meeting lots of new people and making friends. You will meet so many new people this way and also get to do something fun that you enjoy doing at the same time. Have a look when you start at the freshers fair as there will be lots of societies there which you can think about joining and they often put trial sessions on too so you can try them out and see if you like the sound of any of them! I would really recommend this and you will find people with a similar interest to you. There are societies for everything - at Hallam there are so many sports, academic societies and just general hobbies so I am sure there will be lots at the university you go to.
I also found that social media was a great way of making friends and if you are a bit more introverted, this can often be a slightly easier way of talking to people as it can be less daunting talking to people over social media rather than face to face. You can usually find groups on Facebook and other social media for your uni, your course, your halls etc so have a look and see if you can find any as you can usually start talking to a few people this way which is nice as you know some people when you start.
Have a look what your student union puts on too. They will often put events on that do not involve drinking or clubbing which you might prefer! There may be cinema trips, theatre trips, going out for coffees or other fun activities such as this! So I would recommend looking at this as there might be something you like the sound of and you might meet a lot of people doing this!
I hope some of this helps and good luck with your university journey 🙂
Lucy -SHU student ambassador.
Thank you for your post! It’s really helpful, but if i don’t stay in accommodation after first year will it he difficult to make good friends?
Original post by Mari8901
Im going to uni next year and im introverted and pretty bad at socialising so im scared im not gonna make any friends. Im not a fan of the clubbing/drinking culture which i feel like everyone else will do and ill be some outcast. I don’t wanna be friendless for three years at uni. Any advice?
Hey @Mari8901,
Although being introverted can sometimes feel like a bit of a disadvantage when it comes to making friends and building connections at university, it's important to remember that you're not alone and that lots of other students on your course and in your student accommodation will also tend to be more introverted. Make small talk with those around you before a lecture starts, or ask a flatmate to grab some coffee or do a grocery shop with you in the morning. You don't have to find your lifelong best friends in the first week or so - but those small moments of connection you create with course/flatmates can help you form good friendships over time. 🙂
Best of luck at university next year!
Eve (Kingston Rep).
Original post by Mari8901
Im going to uni next year and im introverted and pretty bad at socialising so im scared im not gonna make any friends. Im not a fan of the clubbing/drinking culture which i feel like everyone else will do and ill be some outcast. I don’t wanna be friendless for three years at uni. Any advice?
Hi
I have found that the best way to make friends at Uni is to join the variety of sports and societies that are on offer at Uni. Each university will have a variety of different societies and sports that you can join all of which are really good to join as it allows you to make friends easily as you will all have the same common interests.
I hope this helps,
Matt
Wrexham Uni Reps
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