GCSE English lang q4

Is anybody please able to give this a mark out of 20? Not necessarily a teacher .
This is the start of my mock revision so really interested to know where I am.
Thanks in advance!
Question 4
Focus this part of your answer on the second half of the source, from lines 6 to 12.
A student, having read this section of the text, said:
“This part of the story, where Sarah is walking deeper into the forest, makes the reader feel incredibly tense. The writer uses the forest and the storm to create a sense of danger and isolation.”
To what extent do you agree?
In your response, you could:
Consider your own impressions of Sarah’s situation.
Evaluate how the writer creates a sense of tension and isolation.
Support your response with references to the text.
(20 marks)
I completely agree with the student. I think it is clear that the writer intends for the reader to feel tense, and suspenseful. Additionally, I believe the storm creates a sense of isolation, even when Sarah thinks she is not alone.
When Sarah enters the forest, the reader feels as though all hope has been lost and that Sarah has made the wrong choice about going on the ‘path’ or returning to her ‘village’. When ‘the light was fading fast’ it feels as though all hope is quickly being lost. The noun ‘light’ connotes freedom, which she clearly has in the forest, and hope. However the verb ‘fading’ suggests that these qualities are becoming less prominent by the second, and are instead being taken by the ‘creeping’ storm. However,It feels as though Sarah has chosen this to happen to her due to her understanding of the ‘storm’ and its ‘breaking’ and dangerous possibilities.This makes the reader question Sarah's ignorance, and as she continues to walk into the storm, makes her even more vulnerable. This creates suspense and terror, for Sarah’s fate. Perhaps it could even be argued that Sarah is at one with nature, due to the extract not having Sarah come to any harm.
It is clear that the storm creates a sense of isolation, and that Sarah is solitary in her experience of the storm. As she enters the forest ‘the trees seemed to close in around her’ which suggests that she is almost uncomfortable with the intimacy of nature. The personification of ‘trees… clos(ing)’ around her makes it seem as though the situation is claustrophobic. This further alludes to the idea that nobody is able to reach her. She is trapped in this circle of nature, and the only thing with life around her is the ‘unshakable’ storm. The adjective ‘unshakable’ gives the sense that the storm is angry, and will not become less aggressive. This illuminates the power of nature, and the vulnerability of Sarah. This could even be argued to make the reader have a changed perspective in everyday nature, and view it now as something able to change so quickly.
Throughout the text, the idea of nature being aggressive and dangerous is repeated from the start to the end. It is described as ‘uneasy’ ‘creeping’ and ‘unshakable’ which all could have acted as warning signs to Sarah. This could emphasise her infantility and how little she knows about the world, creating tension and frustration from the reader.
Overall Sarah is isolated in the dangerous ‘storm’, and tension grows as the extract progresses.

Hi, how are you doing? 😄
I would give this a 14/20, Level 3!
It is a clear, relevant explanation with some perceptive comments. You are great at embedding evidence, however, in the first paragraph, I think that you have used too much, which limits your analysis from being developed. To achieve a 16+ on Question 4, you need to include a counter-argument, as this shows the examiner that you are engaging with the text and that you are thinking critically. Furthermore, make sure that you are identifying a range of subject terminology and methods that the writer has used, and then saying the effect that it has on the reader.
Overall, an amazing response! I hope this feedback has helped.
Kind Regards.