How tf do u move on

Basically during my first year of uni I liked this girl that I lived with, and was really close with her. however I didn't ask her out or anything as I didn't want to make the house awkward if she said yes (it's sort of an unwritten rule not to do that in uni accomodations) and a bit due to lack of confidence as well

We decided to both also move in together for second year as well but since we needed a spare person we invited our friend we met (literally 6'5 blonde blue eyed curly hair guy btw) and we all agreed to move in for second year

When we moved in they were literally 24/7 with each other from the start. Like I would be sitting in the living room and them two are literally laying on top of each other flirting and I would feel like a cuck bruh. Since the walls in my room are so thin I can literally hear every convo they have
While I dont think they are officially dating I feel it's inevitable that they will be, might as well accept it now or the heartbreak would be stronger
So how tf am I supposed to move on when I can hear their convos everyday in my room, cooking or ********... or when I pass by and see them being touchy every time I pass the living room. it's literally unavoidable. On top of that I'm also living with them for THIRD YEAR too. So I have to deal with this every day for 2 years

gym arc incoming i guess?

Reply 1

artist.in.red

Maybe a nice pair of headphones, and a shiny new hobby? gym is useful for that

Reply 2

Zarek

A bit of a nightmare situation. Find some next hobbies to distract you, get searching for a new love interest and change your accommodation arrangements for next year

Reply 3

Anonymous #2

bro ur worth sm more than that. focus on urself, go to the gym, hang out w friends, so things you enjoy but mostly, make yourself happy. i would say def change rooms and maybe try to find a new love interest, someone who cares ab u a lot.

and remember, dont make someone a priority when all you are to them is an option.

Reply 4

Dunnig Kruger

What about the 5,000 other young women that are at your university?
Go and break the ice with them and co-operate the most special and compatible ones into becoming your girlfriend.

Why live in a self-imposed glass bubble where the only women in your life are your mum and your housemate?

Don't worry about confidence with women. Competence is more important. Go and find out what it is that makes a man competent with women. And apply that.

There really is nothing to move on from. Because 1 woman doesn't matter at all in the grand scheme of things.

You may not look like a Viking god. There will be other niches that you can fill.

Reply 5

PurpleDiva

Original post by Anonymous

Basically during my first year of uni I liked this girl that I lived with, and was really close with her. however I didn't ask her out or anything as I didn't want to make the house awkward if she said yes (it's sort of an unwritten rule not to do that in uni accomodations) and a bit due to lack of confidence as well
We decided to both also move in together for second year as well but since we needed a spare person we invited our friend we met (literally 6'5 blonde blue eyed curly hair guy btw) and we all agreed to move in for second year
When we moved in they were literally 24/7 with each other from the start. Like I would be sitting in the living room and them two are literally laying on top of each other flirting and I would feel like a cuck bruh. Since the walls in my room are so thin I can literally hear every convo they have
While I dont think they are officially dating I feel it's inevitable that they will be, might as well accept it now or the heartbreak would be stronger
So how tf am I supposed to move on when I can hear their convos everyday in my room, cooking or ********... or when I pass by and see them being touchy every time I pass the living room. it's literally unavoidable. On top of that I'm also living with them for THIRD YEAR too. So I have to deal with this every day for 2 years
gym arc incoming i guess?

ehhhhhh yea thats rough ermmmmmmmm just try ig??

you got it

❤️ Kira M.

(edited 2 months ago)

Reply 6

Anonymous #3

Original post by Anonymous

Basically during my first year of uni I liked this girl that I lived with, and was really close with her. however I didn't ask her out or anything as I didn't want to make the house awkward if she said yes (it's sort of an unwritten rule not to do that in uni accomodations) and a bit due to lack of confidence as well
We decided to both also move in together for second year as well but since we needed a spare person we invited our friend we met (literally 6'5 blonde blue eyed curly hair guy btw) and we all agreed to move in for second year
When we moved in they were literally 24/7 with each other from the start. Like I would be sitting in the living room and them two are literally laying on top of each other flirting and I would feel like a cuck bruh. Since the walls in my room are so thin I can literally hear every convo they have
While I dont think they are officially dating I feel it's inevitable that they will be, might as well accept it now or the heartbreak would be stronger
So how tf am I supposed to move on when I can hear their convos everyday in my room, cooking or ********... or when I pass by and see them being touchy every time I pass the living room. it's literally unavoidable. On top of that I'm also living with them for THIRD YEAR too. So I have to deal with this every day for 2 years
gym arc incoming i guess?

That’s really tough, like the other replies have said try focusing on hobbies or finding someone else to have a crush on (I think getting a new crush will help a lot).

Again I would also suggest not signing for a house with them next year as living with a couple can be isolating eg they don’t go out as much. You could ask other friends or even live in a house with strangers. That way you could broaden your social circle.

I’ve been in a similar situation myself- all will be okay in the end! It’s cliché but time does heal everything.

Reply 7

Kathy89

One of our rules in that situation (I was living with housemates for a long time) is the moment we move in we talk about things like that. If someone develops a feeling to another housemate we should talk. If things explodes it won't be good.
You can't control their feelings and you have to respect them, on the other hand if you can't handle them you should leave. They should respect that too. Talk to both of them, maybe even separately. If you have a good relationship things should work fine.

I also started developing feelings towards a roommate but when we talked we just realized that we won't work as a couple and the best thing is just being good friends.

Expressing feelings is hard, so maybe it is better to talk with her in person or even write her if you don't feel you can talk about it. As for the guy, tell him you like the girl too and explain how you feel about them acting like a couple... do it with respect. Maybe ask him if he likes the girl too... but don't show that you are in his way, just show that you don't want things to get messy and want to resolve a potential problem before it becomes a problem... avoiding problems I mean.

Finding a hobby is a good distraction, but it only works when you are not at home, it won't resolve the problems at home, and not being at home is ruining the whole concept of home...so you will still need to resolve the problem at home and not run away from it.

I hope all works out well.