my boyfriend of almost 1 year had another GIRLFRIEND the whole time

i met my now ex boyfriend in 2023 september, he was charming and nice,and i had really low self esteem so i immediately had feelings for him. in less than a month we shared our first kiss and everything was good. i did have my doubts about him earlier but i ignored my gut and went with it. (ps he was my first real boyfriend and my first kiss among other things). i trusted him and we got into a relationship, he was really immature but he told me he had a rough childhood and thats why he acts the way he does. i forgave him all the time for many big mistakes. i ended up losing my virginity to him in april 2024. i was only a kid, 16. he was older than me. he never used to post me, not even soft launching. i was really skeptical about it but i was very convinced that he loved me because apparently he was good at faking it. i broke up with him over a big fight in august 2024. i felt free and happy after our breakup but i did regret losing my virginity so early. he still texted me after the breakup telling me how he still loves me and he would wait for me his whole life. he told me he had gotten suicidal after the breakup and how he is going to kill himself but i sticked with my decision to not get back together. i felt guilty of breaking up with him.
but recently (in november 2024) i found out through a friend of a friend that he had a girlfriend since june 2023 to april 2024. he was with her even after we had sex.
i am filled with rage right now and i dont know what to do. i need revenge and i dont want to let this go. he had a girlfriend but he used to text her ex from 2022 too that he still loves her. he was playing three girls. both of them weren't physically involved with him but i was. i cant let him get away with this.
what should i do?

Reply 1

Admit-One

Universities Forum Helper

21

Best revenge is getting on with your life and not letting him live in your head rent free.

Reply 2

ageshallnot

21

Original post by Anonymous

i met my now ex boyfriend in 2023 september, he was charming and nice,and i had really low self esteem so i immediately had feelings for him. in less than a month we shared our first kiss and everything was good. i did have my doubts about him earlier but i ignored my gut and went with it. (ps he was my first real boyfriend and my first kiss among other things). i trusted him and we got into a relationship, he was really immature but he told me he had a rough childhood and thats why he acts the way he does. i forgave him all the time for many big mistakes. i ended up losing my virginity to him in april 2024. i was only a kid, 16. he was older than me. he never used to post me, not even soft launching. i was really skeptical about it but i was very convinced that he loved me because apparently he was good at faking it. i broke up with him over a big fight in august 2024. i felt free and happy after our breakup but i did regret losing my virginity so early. he still texted me after the breakup telling me how he still loves me and he would wait for me his whole life. he told me he had gotten suicidal after the breakup and how he is going to kill himself but i sticked with my decision to not get back together. i felt guilty of breaking up with him.
but recently (in november 2024) i found out through a friend of a friend that he had a girlfriend since june 2023 to april 2024. he was with her even after we had sex.
i am filled with rage right now and i dont know what to do. i need revenge and i dont want to let this go. he had a girlfriend but he used to text her ex from 2022 too that he still loves her. he was playing three girls. both of them weren't physically involved with him but i was. i cant let him get away with this.
what should i do?

Take a creative writing course and beast him.

Reply 3

eshayana

3

Original post by Anonymous

i met my now ex boyfriend in 2023 september, he was charming and nice,and i had really low self esteem so i immediately had feelings for him. in less than a month we shared our first kiss and everything was good. i did have my doubts about him earlier but i ignored my gut and went with it. (ps he was my first real boyfriend and my first kiss among other things). i trusted him and we got into a relationship, he was really immature but he told me he had a rough childhood and thats why he acts the way he does. i forgave him all the time for many big mistakes. i ended up losing my virginity to him in april 2024. i was only a kid, 16. he was older than me. he never used to post me, not even soft launching. i was really skeptical about it but i was very convinced that he loved me because apparently he was good at faking it. i broke up with him over a big fight in august 2024. i felt free and happy after our breakup but i did regret losing my virginity so early. he still texted me after the breakup telling me how he still loves me and he would wait for me his whole life. he told me he had gotten suicidal after the breakup and how he is going to kill himself but i sticked with my decision to not get back together. i felt guilty of breaking up with him.
but recently (in november 2024) i found out through a friend of a friend that he had a girlfriend since june 2023 to april 2024. he was with her even after we had sex.
i am filled with rage right now and i dont know what to do. i need revenge and i dont want to let this go. he had a girlfriend but he used to text her ex from 2022 too that he still loves her. he was playing three girls. both of them weren't physically involved with him but i was. i cant let him get away with this.
what should i do?

I’m really sorry this happened to you. Being lied to and betrayed like that is truly heartbreaking, especially after you trusted him with such important parts of yourself. Your anger is totally understandable finding out about this level of dishonesty is painful, and it’s normal to want justice when someone has hurt you so deeply.

As tempting as revenge can feel, it often ends up making things worse for you in the long run. Focusing on him might only keep the pain around longer. Instead, think about ways to take your power back that focus on you like confiding in people you trust, doing things that make you feel strong, and reminding yourself that his actions were not a reflection of your worth. He was dishonest, and that’s entirely on him.

Even though it’s hard, the best thing you can do is cut off all contact with him and use this time to heal and rebuild. You deserve to feel happy and confident in yourself without carrying the weight of his betrayal. Time and distance can do wonders in helping you find closure, and eventually, this experience will be just one chapter in a much larger, more fulfilling story. You have so much strength to have walked away from someone who wasn’t treating you right, and that strength will guide you through this, too.

Reply 4

Ciel.

21

well, you have some (legal) revenge options. for example:

1.

you could post this story on tiktok (with his pics, screenshots etc.). it would probably go viral leading to a lot of embarassment for him. like you could tag his friends family too. his confidence, his social life, prob his current relationship would all take a hit. people would defo side with you and he'd get a lot of ****.

2.

catfishing him with an alt account to teach him a lesson

3.

dm'ing his current girlfriend to let her know what kind of person he is, with receipts

still, is he worth the effort... that's up to you

(edited 3 weeks ago)

my boyfriend of almost 1 year had another GIRLFRIEND the whole time

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