The Student Room Group

Friendship broken down

Hi everyone. I just need some advice about a situation I’m in with my friend. We have been living together for around 2 years and been friends for 3 years and we’ve been quite inseparable since. I’d say there’s been times during the friendship where I did feel like I couldn’t communicate how I was feeling because I’d think she’d respond in a malicious way. We’ve had disagreements in the past and she’s said some horrible passing comments or it’s even gone as far as being physical, pushing me and saying it’s a joke. In the past month I have gotten into a relationship which for me is the first healthy and happy relationship I’ve been in. She never asked much about him when we first started dating and since then I just felt it was easier for me not to speak about him. I’ve noticed that I’ve shut off from her for a while because of this. Yesterday she messaged me a long paragraph about how she feels I have been inconsiderate of her feelings and I haven’t made any effort to make plans with her. Maybe I’ve got quite caught up in my relationship but I’ve still been spending time with her: going out for dinner, going shopping and going to the cinema. I mentioned this to her and she says that these were all her ideas and plans. I do completely understand where she is coming from but I feel like pointing everything at me and not considered my situation or feelings either. As of now we’ve agreed to be civil and have space from each other. I actually feel a huge relief since telling her how I feel and standing up for myself, but I do feel guilty. Any advice on how I go about this? I live with her too and I feel sick about the thought of going back to the flat we share again.

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