Making friends at uni
I am not going to uni until next year, but I am little worried about making friends and want some advice.
I don’t necessary struggle making friends, I can be extremely social and make friends easily. But I generally struggle maintaining friendships and I have never had a large group of friends. This is mainly because I have social anxiety that swings in roundabouts (so sometimes it’s fairly bad and sometimes not at all), but also because I sporadically self isolate or struggle to motivate myself to speak to people and maintain friendships.
I am sure I will try hard at uni, but if the environment is difficult for friend-making it may dishearten me and cause me to give up which will most likely result in me not having friends. Can anyone provide some more information or share their experiences on what making friends at uni is like (specially at top 10 russel groups which is where I have mainly applied).
I don’t necessary struggle making friends, I can be extremely social and make friends easily. But I generally struggle maintaining friendships and I have never had a large group of friends. This is mainly because I have social anxiety that swings in roundabouts (so sometimes it’s fairly bad and sometimes not at all), but also because I sporadically self isolate or struggle to motivate myself to speak to people and maintain friendships.
I am sure I will try hard at uni, but if the environment is difficult for friend-making it may dishearten me and cause me to give up which will most likely result in me not having friends. Can anyone provide some more information or share their experiences on what making friends at uni is like (specially at top 10 russel groups which is where I have mainly applied).
Original post by Anonymous
I am not going to uni until next year, but I am little worried about making friends and want some advice.
I don’t necessary struggle making friends, I can be extremely social and make friends easily. But I generally struggle maintaining friendships and I have never had a large group of friends. This is mainly because I have social anxiety that swings in roundabouts (so sometimes it’s fairly bad and sometimes not at all), but also because I sporadically self isolate or struggle to motivate myself to speak to people and maintain friendships.
I am sure I will try hard at uni, but if the environment is difficult for friend-making it may dishearten me and cause me to give up which will most likely result in me not having friends. Can anyone provide some more information or share their experiences on what making friends at uni is like (specially at top 10 russel groups which is where I have mainly applied).
I don’t necessary struggle making friends, I can be extremely social and make friends easily. But I generally struggle maintaining friendships and I have never had a large group of friends. This is mainly because I have social anxiety that swings in roundabouts (so sometimes it’s fairly bad and sometimes not at all), but also because I sporadically self isolate or struggle to motivate myself to speak to people and maintain friendships.
I am sure I will try hard at uni, but if the environment is difficult for friend-making it may dishearten me and cause me to give up which will most likely result in me not having friends. Can anyone provide some more information or share their experiences on what making friends at uni is like (specially at top 10 russel groups which is where I have mainly applied).
Everyone is in the same boat so you'll be fine -being social is a bonus.
Original post by Anonymous
I am not going to uni until next year, but I am little worried about making friends and want some advice.
I don’t necessary struggle making friends, I can be extremely social and make friends easily. But I generally struggle maintaining friendships and I have never had a large group of friends. This is mainly because I have social anxiety that swings in roundabouts (so sometimes it’s fairly bad and sometimes not at all), but also because I sporadically self isolate or struggle to motivate myself to speak to people and maintain friendships.
I am sure I will try hard at uni, but if the environment is difficult for friend-making it may dishearten me and cause me to give up which will most likely result in me not having friends. Can anyone provide some more information or share their experiences on what making friends at uni is like (specially at top 10 russel groups which is where I have mainly applied).
I don’t necessary struggle making friends, I can be extremely social and make friends easily. But I generally struggle maintaining friendships and I have never had a large group of friends. This is mainly because I have social anxiety that swings in roundabouts (so sometimes it’s fairly bad and sometimes not at all), but also because I sporadically self isolate or struggle to motivate myself to speak to people and maintain friendships.
I am sure I will try hard at uni, but if the environment is difficult for friend-making it may dishearten me and cause me to give up which will most likely result in me not having friends. Can anyone provide some more information or share their experiences on what making friends at uni is like (specially at top 10 russel groups which is where I have mainly applied).
Hi!
From my experience, its a little different from sixth-form/secondary school in that you're not really 'forced' to see the same people everyday. It depends on your university policy but at unis like mine, they don't really track who goes to lectures and who doesn't, like school does. At uni, I've learnt that its best to stay consistent and keep going to stuff you enjoy, to keep meeting the same people
Kind of the obvious, but I've found uni was such a big place - lots of people! It might feel intimidating at first, but its sort of a good thing - there's definitely bound to be people with similar interests to you. recommend when you start uni, to have a look into societies and see if your hobbies align with any of them, or if you'd be interested in doing something new. They're usually a great place to make friends!
~ Fatiha, Cardiff University Student Rep
Original post by Anonymous
I am not going to uni until next year, but I am little worried about making friends and want some advice.
I don’t necessary struggle making friends, I can be extremely social and make friends easily. But I generally struggle maintaining friendships and I have never had a large group of friends. This is mainly because I have social anxiety that swings in roundabouts (so sometimes it’s fairly bad and sometimes not at all), but also because I sporadically self isolate or struggle to motivate myself to speak to people and maintain friendships.
I am sure I will try hard at uni, but if the environment is difficult for friend-making it may dishearten me and cause me to give up which will most likely result in me not having friends. Can anyone provide some more information or share their experiences on what making friends at uni is like (specially at top 10 russel groups which is where I have mainly applied).
I don’t necessary struggle making friends, I can be extremely social and make friends easily. But I generally struggle maintaining friendships and I have never had a large group of friends. This is mainly because I have social anxiety that swings in roundabouts (so sometimes it’s fairly bad and sometimes not at all), but also because I sporadically self isolate or struggle to motivate myself to speak to people and maintain friendships.
I am sure I will try hard at uni, but if the environment is difficult for friend-making it may dishearten me and cause me to give up which will most likely result in me not having friends. Can anyone provide some more information or share their experiences on what making friends at uni is like (specially at top 10 russel groups which is where I have mainly applied).
Hi there,
Lots of people worry about this or think about this before they start uni so you are not alone in feeling like this. Starting uni is completely different to anything you will likely have done before and it can feel daunting thinking about things like making friends!
One of the first things I would say is that everyone is in the same position and will probably be thinking similar things to what you are thinking. It's a new experience for everyone and everyone will be trying to make friends so don't feel like you are gong to be the odd one out.
I would also say that especially in freshers week it is fairly easy to start talking to people as everyone is new and everyone is trying to make friends so you will probably talk to quite a lot of people during this time. Try and speak to as many people as possible during this time as it is a great way of meeting lots of people and making friends as everyone wants to go out and make plans with new people.
I always say this but a great way of making friends is through societies. They are great ways of meeting lots of new people and making friends with a wide range of people as there will be lots of people at these societies and they likely will want to make friends and be social. You all also have something in common which is a good conversation starter and it also just gives you something to do that you enjoy to get you out of your house. The socials are always fun too!
Social media is also a good way of making some friends before you start uni. There will often be groups on social media such as Facebook where you can chat to people you will be studying or living with which is good as it can be less scary than talking to people in person and you get to know them before you start which is nice. It is worth a try!
Your SU will also probably put some events on too which can be really fun and a good way of getting to know some people at your uni. At Hallam, the SU puts on events called 'give it a go' events where you can try new things and get to know lots of new people which are really great and you meet lots of people, so have a look if your uni does anything similar to this.
You will also probably meet lots of new people where you are living. Try and spend time in the kitchen or other social areas when you move in as this is when you will get to know your flatmates the best. Some people really get on with their flatmates and some not as much but as long as you know you have tried your best to be friendly and approachable this is all you can do!
In terms on maintaining friendships, could you talk to your friends about this? Maybe if you explain that you have social anxiety and that sometimes you might not want to go out as much but it isn't them and you will let them know when you want to make plans? It's just an idea but at least this way they would know that it's not them and you still want to be friends!
I hope some of this helps and you enjoy uni
Lucy -SHU student ambassador.
Original post by hallamstudents
Hi there,
Lots of people worry about this or think about this before they start uni so you are not alone in feeling like this. Starting uni is completely different to anything you will likely have done before and it can feel daunting thinking about things like making friends!
One of the first things I would say is that everyone is in the same position and will probably be thinking similar things to what you are thinking. It's a new experience for everyone and everyone will be trying to make friends so don't feel like you are gong to be the odd one out.
I would also say that especially in freshers week it is fairly easy to start talking to people as everyone is new and everyone is trying to make friends so you will probably talk to quite a lot of people during this time. Try and speak to as many people as possible during this time as it is a great way of meeting lots of people and making friends as everyone wants to go out and make plans with new people.
I always say this but a great way of making friends is through societies. They are great ways of meeting lots of new people and making friends with a wide range of people as there will be lots of people at these societies and they likely will want to make friends and be social. You all also have something in common which is a good conversation starter and it also just gives you something to do that you enjoy to get you out of your house. The socials are always fun too!
Social media is also a good way of making some friends before you start uni. There will often be groups on social media such as Facebook where you can chat to people you will be studying or living with which is good as it can be less scary than talking to people in person and you get to know them before you start which is nice. It is worth a try!
Your SU will also probably put some events on too which can be really fun and a good way of getting to know some people at your uni. At Hallam, the SU puts on events called 'give it a go' events where you can try new things and get to know lots of new people which are really great and you meet lots of people, so have a look if your uni does anything similar to this.
You will also probably meet lots of new people where you are living. Try and spend time in the kitchen or other social areas when you move in as this is when you will get to know your flatmates the best. Some people really get on with their flatmates and some not as much but as long as you know you have tried your best to be friendly and approachable this is all you can do!
In terms on maintaining friendships, could you talk to your friends about this? Maybe if you explain that you have social anxiety and that sometimes you might not want to go out as much but it isn't them and you will let them know when you want to make plans? It's just an idea but at least this way they would know that it's not them and you still want to be friends!
I hope some of this helps and you enjoy uni
Lucy -SHU student ambassador.
Lots of people worry about this or think about this before they start uni so you are not alone in feeling like this. Starting uni is completely different to anything you will likely have done before and it can feel daunting thinking about things like making friends!
One of the first things I would say is that everyone is in the same position and will probably be thinking similar things to what you are thinking. It's a new experience for everyone and everyone will be trying to make friends so don't feel like you are gong to be the odd one out.
I would also say that especially in freshers week it is fairly easy to start talking to people as everyone is new and everyone is trying to make friends so you will probably talk to quite a lot of people during this time. Try and speak to as many people as possible during this time as it is a great way of meeting lots of people and making friends as everyone wants to go out and make plans with new people.
I always say this but a great way of making friends is through societies. They are great ways of meeting lots of new people and making friends with a wide range of people as there will be lots of people at these societies and they likely will want to make friends and be social. You all also have something in common which is a good conversation starter and it also just gives you something to do that you enjoy to get you out of your house. The socials are always fun too!
Social media is also a good way of making some friends before you start uni. There will often be groups on social media such as Facebook where you can chat to people you will be studying or living with which is good as it can be less scary than talking to people in person and you get to know them before you start which is nice. It is worth a try!
Your SU will also probably put some events on too which can be really fun and a good way of getting to know some people at your uni. At Hallam, the SU puts on events called 'give it a go' events where you can try new things and get to know lots of new people which are really great and you meet lots of people, so have a look if your uni does anything similar to this.
You will also probably meet lots of new people where you are living. Try and spend time in the kitchen or other social areas when you move in as this is when you will get to know your flatmates the best. Some people really get on with their flatmates and some not as much but as long as you know you have tried your best to be friendly and approachable this is all you can do!
In terms on maintaining friendships, could you talk to your friends about this? Maybe if you explain that you have social anxiety and that sometimes you might not want to go out as much but it isn't them and you will let them know when you want to make plans? It's just an idea but at least this way they would know that it's not them and you still want to be friends!
I hope some of this helps and you enjoy uni
Lucy -SHU student ambassador.
Thank you for your response, I will keep in mind societies and fresher.
Unfortunately due to not being good at maintaining friendships I actually have no friends, so I can’t really do that haha, but I will try harder to overcome my social anxiety at uni.
Original post by Anonymous
I am not going to uni until next year, but I am little worried about making friends and want some advice.
I don’t necessary struggle making friends, I can be extremely social and make friends easily. But I generally struggle maintaining friendships and I have never had a large group of friends. This is mainly because I have social anxiety that swings in roundabouts (so sometimes it’s fairly bad and sometimes not at all), but also because I sporadically self isolate or struggle to motivate myself to speak to people and maintain friendships.
I am sure I will try hard at uni, but if the environment is difficult for friend-making it may dishearten me and cause me to give up which will most likely result in me not having friends. Can anyone provide some more information or share their experiences on what making friends at uni is like (specially at top 10 russel groups which is where I have mainly applied).
I don’t necessary struggle making friends, I can be extremely social and make friends easily. But I generally struggle maintaining friendships and I have never had a large group of friends. This is mainly because I have social anxiety that swings in roundabouts (so sometimes it’s fairly bad and sometimes not at all), but also because I sporadically self isolate or struggle to motivate myself to speak to people and maintain friendships.
I am sure I will try hard at uni, but if the environment is difficult for friend-making it may dishearten me and cause me to give up which will most likely result in me not having friends. Can anyone provide some more information or share their experiences on what making friends at uni is like (specially at top 10 russel groups which is where I have mainly applied).
Hi there!
The responses on this thread have got some really good advice - such as making use of societies, freshers week, and social media! I really agree with all of these!
When you start university, you'll quickly realise everyone feels the same, even if they don't show it. Moving out is scary. Starting out somewhere new is scary. The unknown is scary. Everyone will be scared! When I started in 2022, I unfortunately ended up with COVID, so missed all of Freshers' and the first week of my course. As a result I found it really difficult to fit in. However, towards the end of the first semester, I got put with some girls for a group project (my worst nightmare), but actually, those people are some of my best friends two years later!🤗 It took a while, as I'm also quite introverted and didn't engage with any societies, but I found my people, and you will too!
I hope this gives you a little reassurance! You will be okay!
-Kiera (Student Ambassador)
Original post by Anonymous
I am not going to uni until next year, but I am little worried about making friends and want some advice.
I don’t necessary struggle making friends, I can be extremely social and make friends easily. But I generally struggle maintaining friendships and I have never had a large group of friends. This is mainly because I have social anxiety that swings in roundabouts (so sometimes it’s fairly bad and sometimes not at all), but also because I sporadically self isolate or struggle to motivate myself to speak to people and maintain friendships.
I am sure I will try hard at uni, but if the environment is difficult for friend-making it may dishearten me and cause me to give up which will most likely result in me not having friends. Can anyone provide some more information or share their experiences on what making friends at uni is like (specially at top 10 russel groups which is where I have mainly applied).
I don’t necessary struggle making friends, I can be extremely social and make friends easily. But I generally struggle maintaining friendships and I have never had a large group of friends. This is mainly because I have social anxiety that swings in roundabouts (so sometimes it’s fairly bad and sometimes not at all), but also because I sporadically self isolate or struggle to motivate myself to speak to people and maintain friendships.
I am sure I will try hard at uni, but if the environment is difficult for friend-making it may dishearten me and cause me to give up which will most likely result in me not having friends. Can anyone provide some more information or share their experiences on what making friends at uni is like (specially at top 10 russel groups which is where I have mainly applied).
Hi there,
Your ability to be social and make friends easily is a great start. The key is to put yourself out there consistently. Join societies, attend events, and participate in group projects. These activities provide natural settings to form connections.
Many students feel the same way you do. Be open about your experiences - you might find others who relate. And don't be too hard on yourself during periods when your social anxiety is more challenging. University life has its ups and downs for everyone.
Stay positive and keep trying,
Ilya
Original post by Anonymous
I am not going to uni until next year, but I am little worried about making friends and want some advice.
I don’t necessary struggle making friends, I can be extremely social and make friends easily. But I generally struggle maintaining friendships and I have never had a large group of friends. This is mainly because I have social anxiety that swings in roundabouts (so sometimes it’s fairly bad and sometimes not at all), but also because I sporadically self isolate or struggle to motivate myself to speak to people and maintain friendships.
I am sure I will try hard at uni, but if the environment is difficult for friend-making it may dishearten me and cause me to give up which will most likely result in me not having friends. Can anyone provide some more information or share their experiences on what making friends at uni is like (specially at top 10 russel groups which is where I have mainly applied).
I don’t necessary struggle making friends, I can be extremely social and make friends easily. But I generally struggle maintaining friendships and I have never had a large group of friends. This is mainly because I have social anxiety that swings in roundabouts (so sometimes it’s fairly bad and sometimes not at all), but also because I sporadically self isolate or struggle to motivate myself to speak to people and maintain friendships.
I am sure I will try hard at uni, but if the environment is difficult for friend-making it may dishearten me and cause me to give up which will most likely result in me not having friends. Can anyone provide some more information or share their experiences on what making friends at uni is like (specially at top 10 russel groups which is where I have mainly applied).
Hi Anom,
I understand your concern, but do not less this stress you out. I honestly believe university is an excellent environment if you wish to make friends. There are so many avenues to find friends that I'm sure you will not struggle.
Societies are one of the best ways to make friends as it brings together lots of like-minded people and everyone is there to make friends. You can join most societies any time of year too, so you always have an opportunity to be social. Often societies regularly hold social events, so I recommend going along to some, especially at the beginning of the year.
Class is also an excellent place to meet people, You are all brought together on the common interest of your degree, therefore you have the perfect conversation starter.
If you wish to make some friends before university, during the summer months many universities will set up online Facebook groups for different courses, I recommend checking this out closer to the time.
Being confident will be your best asset when making new friends as some people, including myself, are quite introverted and struggle to make that first step. As you have said you are great at socialising, I think you will find people will gravitate to you from just being a friendly confident person!
Good luck with your studies, please feel free to ask me any questions,
-Sophia (business and management)
Original post by Anonymous
I am not going to uni until next year, but I am little worried about making friends and want some advice.
I don’t necessary struggle making friends, I can be extremely social and make friends easily. But I generally struggle maintaining friendships and I have never had a large group of friends. This is mainly because I have social anxiety that swings in roundabouts (so sometimes it’s fairly bad and sometimes not at all), but also because I sporadically self isolate or struggle to motivate myself to speak to people and maintain friendships.
I am sure I will try hard at uni, but if the environment is difficult for friend-making it may dishearten me and cause me to give up which will most likely result in me not having friends. Can anyone provide some more information or share their experiences on what making friends at uni is like (specially at top 10 russel groups which is where I have mainly applied).
I don’t necessary struggle making friends, I can be extremely social and make friends easily. But I generally struggle maintaining friendships and I have never had a large group of friends. This is mainly because I have social anxiety that swings in roundabouts (so sometimes it’s fairly bad and sometimes not at all), but also because I sporadically self isolate or struggle to motivate myself to speak to people and maintain friendships.
I am sure I will try hard at uni, but if the environment is difficult for friend-making it may dishearten me and cause me to give up which will most likely result in me not having friends. Can anyone provide some more information or share their experiences on what making friends at uni is like (specially at top 10 russel groups which is where I have mainly applied).
Hi
Please try not to worry about this. There are more people in this position than you think.
I think that the best way to make friends at uni is to speak to different people at student union events as I find that it is the easiest to speak to people at these events.
In addition to this, joining sports teams or societies can be a really good place to make friends as you all have the same common interests which makes for more meaningful friendships.
I also found that It can be quite easy to make friends with people who are on your course as they have similar interests/ personalities.
I hope this helps,
Matt
Wrexham Uni Reps
Hey there,
My name is Siobhan and I'm a third year student at UCLAN. First of all, I'd like to reassure you that you are definitely not the only one who is feeling like this and it's great that you're reaching out for advice!
There's countless ways that you can make friends at uni and I wouldn't put too much pressure to go out and do things you are uncomfortable doing! You can take it at your own pace and take breaks when you say you have your roundabouts, the opportunities will always be there. I think a lot of people want to jump right in to make friends at the start of uni, and this may work for some, but I would recommend doing bits and pieces at a time, so you can find you feet as it is a big change.
If you're staying in halls, can make friends with your flatmates, but this is not always essential! One thing I found helpful to do this was to leave a not on my door explaining who I am, my course, where I have come from and what my interests are, and this was a great conversation starter.
Societies are also a great thing to sign up for and you don't always have to commit to them. You can join several and go to the fairs/taster sessions to see what they are like. Societies typically have events that go on and weekly gatherings so you will always have the opportunity to go when you feel like it and there's no pressure to always go. The same applies for sports. You can also join up in whichever semester you would like, so don't feel like you have to do this all at once.
You can also keep an eye out for social events that happen in accommodations such as welcome parties, Halloween parties Christmas parties etc. You can meet loads of new people at these events who will all be close by. You can also look out for uni events which you should find on the social media page or the student union page.
Again, try not to put too much pressure as you will make friends along the whole way. I'm in 3rd year and only met some of my closest friends in 2nd and 3rd year, so I hope that offers you some comfort.
Hope this has helped and please let me know if you have nay more questions!
Siobhan (3rd year student ambassador at UCLAN)
My name is Siobhan and I'm a third year student at UCLAN. First of all, I'd like to reassure you that you are definitely not the only one who is feeling like this and it's great that you're reaching out for advice!
There's countless ways that you can make friends at uni and I wouldn't put too much pressure to go out and do things you are uncomfortable doing! You can take it at your own pace and take breaks when you say you have your roundabouts, the opportunities will always be there. I think a lot of people want to jump right in to make friends at the start of uni, and this may work for some, but I would recommend doing bits and pieces at a time, so you can find you feet as it is a big change.
If you're staying in halls, can make friends with your flatmates, but this is not always essential! One thing I found helpful to do this was to leave a not on my door explaining who I am, my course, where I have come from and what my interests are, and this was a great conversation starter.
Societies are also a great thing to sign up for and you don't always have to commit to them. You can join several and go to the fairs/taster sessions to see what they are like. Societies typically have events that go on and weekly gatherings so you will always have the opportunity to go when you feel like it and there's no pressure to always go. The same applies for sports. You can also join up in whichever semester you would like, so don't feel like you have to do this all at once.
You can also keep an eye out for social events that happen in accommodations such as welcome parties, Halloween parties Christmas parties etc. You can meet loads of new people at these events who will all be close by. You can also look out for uni events which you should find on the social media page or the student union page.
Again, try not to put too much pressure as you will make friends along the whole way. I'm in 3rd year and only met some of my closest friends in 2nd and 3rd year, so I hope that offers you some comfort.
Hope this has helped and please let me know if you have nay more questions!
Siobhan (3rd year student ambassador at UCLAN)
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