Feel too stupid for smart people and too smart for stupid people

I know it’s ridiculous to look at things through some intellectual hierarchy but it’s hard when it effects your quality of life and how you get to socialise and be involved with the world. I find myself as a bit of an outsider not finding a sense of belonging cus of this.

I wouldn’t say I’m dense like I was a precocious kid/teen but because of mental health difficulties I faced burnout in my adulthood and I think I have undiagnosed tism which I find effects how I communicate and I can’t articulate myself as well I’d like and never as smart as I’d like to be especially for my age in mid twenties.

Whenever I try to be involved in discourse with smart people, even when I can get my point across confidently, I find it socially challenging and many times people don’t bounce off my ideas or entertain them which makes me feel like I come across as stupid. It’s frustrating bc I enjoy speaking on topics with others but it’s always a hit to my confidence when I feel like I come across as having a 14yo level of understanding on them and people don’t engage with me the way I see them do with others.

And you might say oh just become more well read in order to not seem so juvenile, the thing is I absorb a lot of info all the time yet still feel like I’m behind other people and always just feel like the smartest bimbo in town.

Reply 1

elareare

Original post

by RatRestaraunt

I know it’s ridiculous to look at things through some intellectual hierarchy but it’s hard when it effects your quality of life and how you get to socialise and be involved with the world. I find myself as a bit of an outsider not finding a sense of belonging cus of this.
I wouldn’t say I’m dense like I was a precocious kid/teen but because of mental health difficulties I faced burnout in my adulthood and I think I have undiagnosed tism which I find effects how I communicate and I can’t articulate myself as well I’d like and never as smart as I’d like to be especially for my age in mid twenties.
Whenever I try to be involved in discourse with smart people, even when I can get my point across confidently, I find it socially challenging and many times people don’t bounce off my ideas or entertain them which makes me feel like I come across as stupid. It’s frustrating bc I enjoy speaking on topics with others but it’s always a hit to my confidence when I feel like I come across as having a 14yo level of understanding on them and people don’t engage with me the way I see them do with others.
And you might say oh just become more well read in order to not seem so juvenile, the thing is I absorb a lot of info all the time yet still feel like I’m behind other people and always just feel like the smartest bimbo in town.

I feel that (to an extent, most people my age are a bit thick)... when you're with idiots, don't even bother trying to be intellectual, when you're with the geniuses, listen and learn from them, and when you build up understanding and confidence, then contribute to the conversation

Reply 2

PinkMobilePhone

Chat Forum Helper, Life & Style Forum Helper

What exactly are you basing your judgement of intellect on?

If you talk to someone about a topic they know a lot about, they're going to sound incredibly smart. Bring up a different topic though that they've never looked into, and they'll look at you like a cow looks at an oncoming train.

Nobody knows everything about everything, and some very academic people have very little common sense.