Pls mark my english essay?

Hi! I do OCR english literautre gcse and my mock is next week. I'm on study leave so i can't get my English teacher to mark this pride and prejudice essay so if anyone could mark it please? Its out of 40 marks and its from the June 2023 English Literature Paper 1 Section B OCR - extract question. Any feedback? I really need to improve my english grade for the mocks
How does Austen present Mr and Mrs Bennet as parents in this extract and elsewhere in the novel?
In her novel ‘Pride and Prejudice,’ Austen presents Mr and Mrs Bennet as negligent and irresponsible parents. She typically characterises Mr Bennet as sarcastic and uninterested, and Mrs Bennet as vain and marriage-obsessed, and criticises their parenting throughout the novel.
In this extract, Elizabeth refuses Mr Collins’s proposal. Mrs Bennet, who is determined to get all five of her daughters married, very harshly criticises Elizabeth’s decision. Mrs Bennet claims she will “never see her [Lizzy] again” if she does not marry Mr Collins. Austen condemns Mrs Bennet's reaction by portraying her as frantic and vexed by Elizabeth’s decision. This characterises Mrs Bennet as a parent who values her daughters’ marital status above their happiness, as Mr Collins will certainly not make Lizzy happy, yet she is desperate to marry her off to him. Austen says Mrs Bennet “again and again… threatened her.” The repetition of “again” emphasises how desperate Mrs Bennet is to change Lizzy’s refusal and characterises Mrs Bennet as tedious and stubborn. Furthermore, Austen described Mrs Bennet's approaches as “attacks” to highlight the violence with which Mrs Bennet approaches, and presents her as quite wild and almost animalistic in her manner. Although Austen condemns Mrs Bennet’s disregard for her daughter's happiness, it could be argued that Mrs Bennet is caring. In the Regency era, women who remained unmarried were severely castigated, and deemed “spinsters” which was not respectable at all. Mrs Bennet, therefore, is clearly aware of the dangers of spinsterhood, and is trying to protect her daughters from this.
In this extract, Austen presents Mr Bennet as a comical character, through his satirical comments, but also highlights his carelessness as a father of daughters. Mr Bennet claims he “will not see you [Lizzy] if you do” marry Collins. Here Mr Bennet is clearly mocking Mrs Bennet by repeating her ultimatum, but twisting it to benefit Elizabeth. Although his sarcasm is humorous for the reader, it also presents Mr Bennet as a good father, by providing for Lizzy the option to refuse Collins. This shows he prioritises his daughters happiness, and does not want to confine Lizzy to an unhappy marriage. However, he could be seen as ignorant to the dangers of remaining unmarried, because if he wanted to, he could’ve made Lizzy marry Collins if he cared as much about her marrying as Mrs Bennet. This makes it seem as if Mr Bennet is absolving himself of any responsibility of finding his daughters a husband.
Another moment which presents the Bennets as irresponsible parents is when Mr Bennet gave Lydia permission to go to Brighton. Firstly, Mr Bennet sees Lydia’s improper behaviour as an inconvenience rather than something to amend or take responsibility for. He knows Lydia will always embarrass herself, and sending her to Brighton will be at “little expense or inconvenience to her family.” His irresponsibility is clearly shown here as he isn’t concerned with Lydia's behaviour, but only at making sure she behaves poorly without bothering him, so he agrees to send her to Brighton. Furthermore, when Elizabeth attempts to reason with him, and alert him to the consequences of Lydia’s impropriety, Mr Bennet responds with “has she frightened away some of your lovers? Poor little Lizzy!” Austen's use of the satirical and condescending tone shows how Mr Bennet is not concerned at all with how Lydia’s behaviour is impacting the family, and the Bennet sisters reputation. His lack of awareness of the seriousness of the situation can also be argued to encourage Lydia’s behaviour, as she was never taught the consequences of her actions. Lydia’s going to Brigthon was also encouraged by Mrs Bennet as she claims she was “also in love with a red coat once.” Austen highlights the similarities between Mrs Bennet and Lydia, implying Mrs Bennet's impact and influence on Lydia's behaviour - Mrs Bennet does not criticise Lydia's improper behaviour because she behaves in the same way.
Another time Mrs Bennet is presented as vain is when she learns about Elizabeth and Darcy’s engagement. Though at first silent, she later exclaims “What fine carriages! What jewels! What clothes! … 10000 a year!” Here, Austen emphasises Mrs Bennet's vain obsession with materialistic items through the use of exclamations. The exclamations specifically emphasise Mrs Bennet’s engrossment in Lizzy’s newfound wealth. Austen seeks to criticise Mrs Bennet's vanity as she previously has described Mr Darcy as “disagreeable” and the “proudest man.” The contrast between her previous hatred and her now ecstatic reaction to their connection emphasises how quickly Mrs Bennets overlooks Mr Darcy’s pride because of his wealth and status. In contrast, Mr Bennet showed more interest in Elizabeth’s feelings towards Darcy. He recognises that she will have more wealth, carriages, and clothes than Jane but still asks “will they make you happy?” This shows that Mr Bennet is clearly concerned with Lizzy’s happiness, and wants to ensure she is in a happy marriage. Here Austen presents Mr Bennet as a good father as he is willing to overlook Mr Darcy’s wealth, if he thinks he would not make her happy. However, Austen alerts to the reader in Chapter 1 that Mr Bennet has a particular favouritism towards Lizzy, so perhaps he is not so good a father towards his other daughters.
In conclusion, Austen presents both Bennet parents as careless and irresponsible, though in different ways. While she characterises Mr Bennet as ignorant to Regency expectations of women and uninterested in the security of his daughters, she characterises Mrs Bennet as the opposite; overly concerned with marriage to such an extent that she is willing to sacrifice her daughters health and happiness to secure them husbands.

Hi! This is amazing - one thing though would be to in your intro/conclusion focus more on the extract that your knowledge of the entire novel.

Tysm! For some reason starting is the hardest and concluding is always rushed because I was running out of time. Do you think this would be in the higher bands on the mark scheme?