The Student Room Group

It has been two years since I graduated and I don't know what to do

I was fortunate enough to study at a decent university in the UK, majoring in economics and studying french. I utilised my opportunities to work in the UAE, Eastern Europe, and now I just feel lost. I make a decent amount of money, and as int the UAE there is no income tax, therefore disposable income is high, but I am just so bored, yes I stay fit, make music now and then, but I just am so bored with everything, or maybe I am just not doing things that challenge me any more. I know I am not the only one that goes through this. Any ideas to gain more ambition?
Original post
by MeFamile
I was fortunate enough to study at a decent university in the UK, majoring in economics and studying french. I utilised my opportunities to work in the UAE, Eastern Europe, and now I just feel lost. I make a decent amount of money, and as int the UAE there is no income tax, therefore disposable income is high, but I am just so bored, yes I stay fit, make music now and then, but I just am so bored with everything, or maybe I am just not doing things that challenge me any more. I know I am not the only one that goes through this. Any ideas to gain more ambition?
So you want to find your purpose/passion? Something that fulfils you? It's a common problem. There is a plethora of websites out there that you can look at to help, but it all really comes down to you though.

The commonly quoted pillars of life that a lot of people consider important in life are: relationships, wealth, health, and happiness. You can sometimes include other pillars as well e.g. spirituality, career, intellectual development. Mine for example includes a framework of 9 pillars - each one a pain to do.

If it's about finding things that challenge you, then it depends on what you like, what you find rewarding, what you consider a challenge. I think it was Jordan Peterson who said something along the lines of life is a struggle, but you get to pick which struggle you want and it needs to be one that means something to you. For some, it can mean creating social impact. For others, finding people who they want to be with. Some though are hooked onto money. I don't know what yours is since there's nothing in the post that hints at anything.

Otherwise, come up with a bucket list of things that you always wanted to do in your life. Most of the commonly mentioned endeavours include:

Learning a foreign language (or multiple languages in your case)

Playing an instrument

Writing a book

Travel

Learning a life skill e.g. presentation, cooking, fixing cars

Learning a high income skill

Building a business

Starting a charity

Teach English abroad

Getting an advanced degree

Learning a martial art

Learning proper etiquette

Owning a house

Getting fit

You will have to google for your inspirations

One of the bigger things in life is usually to start a family. If it's something you always wanted to do, consider looking whilst you have sufficient time.

The other thing is to look at what weaknesses you have and try to find ways to improve yourself on them. For example, if you always found writing challenging, you can look at various English or creative writing courses.

Reply 2

Thank you for your in-depth response and taking the time out to do so. I agree on the fact of finding my struggle and sticking with it. I was blessed enough to do learn touch on all of the things you mentioned in my formative years, except starting a family and owning a house of course.

I think the biggest issue for me is that I reached my goal and I ask myself what is my next, I've been in a relationship for the last 3.5 years now and we plan on making things official early next year, but I believe given the autonomy in my work it has numbed my brain, like something you get after doomscrolling.

This month, I will start experimenting by getting back into piano/music production and devoting more time on researching for my business I'd say.

Again, I would like to thank you and I really appreciate your response and how you mentioned finding your struggle
Original post
by MeFamile
Thank you for your in-depth response and taking the time out to do so. I agree on the fact of finding my struggle and sticking with it. I was blessed enough to do learn touch on all of the things you mentioned in my formative years, except starting a family and owning a house of course.
I think the biggest issue for me is that I reached my goal and I ask myself what is my next, I've been in a relationship for the last 3.5 years now and we plan on making things official early next year, but I believe given the autonomy in my work it has numbed my brain, like something you get after doomscrolling.
This month, I will start experimenting by getting back into piano/music production and devoting more time on researching for my business I'd say.
Again, I would like to thank you and I really appreciate your response and how you mentioned finding your struggle

I think the biggest issue for me is that I reached my goal and I ask myself what is my next
I think one of the philosophies of goal setting is that there shouldn't be an end to the goals you have set. Once you have attained a specific goal, you should always have another one set in place. It shouldn't mean that you don't celebrate the small wins (what's a small win?) and take time to soak in the achievement, but to continue improving and moving forward you should have another one in place so you know what you should strive for next e.g. If I have passed Grade 4 on the piano, I should work on getting Grade 5, and then 6 when I have achieved Grade 5, etc; once I have attained Grade 8, I then focus on how to improve playing at orchestral standard, etc.

I've been in a relationship for the last 3.5 years now and we plan on making things official early next year
Congrats

I believe given the autonomy in my work it has numbed my brain, like something you get after doomscrolling.
So are you saying that you're looking for something more challenging in your field or something you wish to work more towards?

Again, I would like to thank you and I really appreciate your response and how you mentioned finding your struggle
You're welcome. See the following:
https://youtu.be/onsR752kNf0?si=NjnCrlIPzgiQbWYf
https://youtu.be/6Ghkb345_tA?si=lFVYgvn849lmnoVm
https://youtu.be/sLLyWBySGwg?si=A3fqDo2bxjmAQyId

Reply 4

Thank you, Mindmax for your reply.

I think one of the philosophies of goal setting is that there shouldn't be an end to the goals you have set. Once you have attained a specific goal, you should always have another one set in place. It shouldn't mean that you don't celebrate the small wins (what's a small win?) and take time to soak in the achievement, but to continue improving and moving forward you should have another one in place so you know what you should strive for next e.g. If I have passed Grade 4 on the piano, I should work on getting Grade 5, and then 6 when I have achieved Grade 5, etc; once I have attained Grade 8, I then focus on how to improve playing at orchestral standard, etc.

I totally agree—there’s so much truth to the idea that goals shouldn’t have an end point. Life feels more meaningful when you’re always working toward something new, but you’re absolutely right that celebrating the small wins along the way is just as important. For me, a small win is anything that reminds you you’re making progress, like nailing a tough piece of music or finally feeling comfortable with a new skill. It’s those little moments that keep you motivated.

I like your example of working through piano grades. It’s such a great way to think about personal growt and once you hit one goal, finding a new way to challenge yourself. It’s a reminder that the journey is just as important, if not more, than the destination.

Do you already have something in mind for your next goal? It sounds like you’re already in a great headspace to keep moving forward!

So are you saying that you're looking for something more challenging in your field or something you wish to work more towards?

Yeah, exactly. I feel like I need something that challenges me again, something that really makes me think and keeps me engaged. Don’t get me wrong, having autonomy is nice, but it’s started to feel a bit... dull, like I’m just going through the motions without anything pushing me.

Thank you for sharing those links—I’ve checked them out, and I really enjoyed the insights. I’ve always appreciated Jordan Peterson’s work; his book 12 Rules of Life was a game changer for me in my early 20s. It really helped clarify so much about navigating challenges and building a meaningful life. Thanks again for pointing me in that direction!
Original post
by MeFamile
Thank you, Mindmax for your reply.
I think one of the philosophies of goal setting is that there shouldn't be an end to the goals you have set. Once you have attained a specific goal, you should always have another one set in place. It shouldn't mean that you don't celebrate the small wins (what's a small win?) and take time to soak in the achievement, but to continue improving and moving forward you should have another one in place so you know what you should strive for next e.g. If I have passed Grade 4 on the piano, I should work on getting Grade 5, and then 6 when I have achieved Grade 5, etc; once I have attained Grade 8, I then focus on how to improve playing at orchestral standard, etc.
I totally agree—there’s so much truth to the idea that goals shouldn’t have an end point. Life feels more meaningful when you’re always working toward something new, but you’re absolutely right that celebrating the small wins along the way is just as important. For me, a small win is anything that reminds you you’re making progress, like nailing a tough piece of music or finally feeling comfortable with a new skill. It’s those little moments that keep you motivated.
I like your example of working through piano grades. It’s such a great way to think about personal growt and once you hit one goal, finding a new way to challenge yourself. It’s a reminder that the journey is just as important, if not more, than the destination.
Do you already have something in mind for your next goal? It sounds like you’re already in a great headspace to keep moving forward!
So are you saying that you're looking for something more challenging in your field or something you wish to work more towards?
Yeah, exactly. I feel like I need something that challenges me again, something that really makes me think and keeps me engaged. Don’t get me wrong, having autonomy is nice, but it’s started to feel a bit... dull, like I’m just going through the motions without anything pushing me.
Thank you for sharing those links—I’ve checked them out, and I really enjoyed the insights. I’ve always appreciated Jordan Peterson’s work; his book 12 Rules of Life was a game changer for me in my early 20s. It really helped clarify so much about navigating challenges and building a meaningful life. Thanks again for pointing me in that direction!

Do you already have something in mind for your next goal? It sounds like you’re already in a great headspace to keep moving forward!
My bucket list is 15 pages long, where at least 5 of those pages are related to travel destinations.
I have goals regarding academics, wealth, business, relationships, health, arts, sciences, projects, etc.

Yeah, exactly. I feel like I need something that challenges me again, something that really makes me think and keeps me engaged. Don’t get me wrong, having autonomy is nice, but it’s started to feel a bit... dull, like I’m just going through the motions without anything pushing me.
Whilst this is something I would consult a career coach or a mentor (who is 10-20 years ahead of you) with, have you looked into the career progression in your field? For example, higher professional qualifications, make partner, CPDs, etc.

Quick Reply

How The Student Room is moderated

To keep The Student Room safe for everyone, we moderate posts that are added to the site.