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How to navigate breaking up process while living with them?

Me and bf both 24 been together 4 years, living together 2 n half years. I have decided it is coming to an end as I don't want it anymore his not my forever person, our morals don't align. His changes as a person and his not as generous kind as when I met him. Its to thr point I don't see a future and have told him this and paid to end our tenency early. We have about a month and a half left of living with each other until our new places are ready.

Bf seems in denial about it all, it's obvious he doesn't accept the break up he wants to work on it and says he loves me. He is also moving to an island which would take about 3-4 hours to travel to. He wants to do long distance and make it work, I have told him no but he asked to just get along n hopes to change my mind by the time we move out.

My minds not changing, I don't want yo do long distance, the relationship hasn't been all happy to hold onto like that. Ive removed our posts of socials and ive siad no to any plans he tried to make. Now my issue is we are I the festive season... Christmas. His not close to his family don't even think his told them whats going on but think that's a bit of denial, anyways his not seeing them. Now I'm going to my mums Christmas day and I haven't invited him well bc my mum doesnt like him and I don't blame her as he did not treat me right. I also don't think I should bring a boy who I no longer plan to be with to Christmas. So that was established.

However I am going my dads on boxing day and my bf would like to come and I think I had originally said he could. My dads ok with him but knows I'm basically done. I am probably going go let him come as I will be taking ghe dog (who is mine but got the dog while with him) so he will feel very alone.. I wish he'd go to his families but then again they are not close and we moved nearer to mine.

My bf says he understands everything. Idek if to call him bf but he crs ike his with me still and we still live toegger and get along but I just know I won't want to continue. Am I okay to have him over at my dad's on boxing day without that saying something has changed? We are friendly ect but our couple intimate moments have ceased to exist. Idk if my bf soon to be ex is just holding onto some hope m trying to get some last good memories.

Is it okay to have him over boxing day? Or will that be too confusing... but we are currently still living in our tiny flat together ao the whole situation is weird... help can I get soke advice?
Original post by Anonymous
Me and bf both 24 been together 4 years, living together 2 n half years. I have decided it is coming to an end as I don't want it anymore his not my forever person, our morals don't align. His changes as a person and his not as generous kind as when I met him. Its to thr point I don't see a future and have told him this and paid to end our tenency early. We have about a month and a half left of living with each other until our new places are ready.
Bf seems in denial about it all, it's obvious he doesn't accept the break up he wants to work on it and says he loves me. He is also moving to an island which would take about 3-4 hours to travel to. He wants to do long distance and make it work, I have told him no but he asked to just get along n hopes to change my mind by the time we move out.
My minds not changing, I don't want yo do long distance, the relationship hasn't been all happy to hold onto like that. Ive removed our posts of socials and ive siad no to any plans he tried to make. Now my issue is we are I the festive season... Christmas. His not close to his family don't even think his told them whats going on but think that's a bit of denial, anyways his not seeing them. Now I'm going to my mums Christmas day and I haven't invited him well bc my mum doesnt like him and I don't blame her as he did not treat me right. I also don't think I should bring a boy who I no longer plan to be with to Christmas. So that was established.
However I am going my dads on boxing day and my bf would like to come and I think I had originally said he could. My dads ok with him but knows I'm basically done. I am probably going go let him come as I will be taking ghe dog (who is mine but got the dog while with him) so he will feel very alone.. I wish he'd go to his families but then again they are not close and we moved nearer to mine.
My bf says he understands everything. Idek if to call him bf but he crs ike his with me still and we still live toegger and get along but I just know I won't want to continue. Am I okay to have him over at my dad's on boxing day without that saying something has changed? We are friendly ect but our couple intimate moments have ceased to exist. Idk if my bf soon to be ex is just holding onto some hope m trying to get some last good memories.
Is it okay to have him over boxing day? Or will that be too confusing... but we are currently still living in our tiny flat together ao the whole situation is weird... help can I get soke advice?

As long as you are mature about it you will be fine, you are both adults and can comprehend that it is not polar. You can be friends but given the context of your breakup my assumption is that you do not think he is a very good person? Just be friendly and kind and you'll get through it. It may be a hard time for him but it is also a hard time for you, don't forget that. You are your main priority everything else comes second, ride this wave and you'll get through it just fine
Reply 2
Original post by IDKwhatUsername9
As long as you are mature about it you will be fine, you are both adults and can comprehend that it is not polar. You can be friends but given the context of your breakup my assumption is that you do not think he is a very good person? Just be friendly and kind and you'll get through it. It may be a hard time for him but it is also a hard time for you, don't forget that. You are your main priority everything else comes second, ride this wave and you'll get through it just fine


Yeah his just become inconsiderate, selfish, very good at ignoring problems and me and lies for no reason. Lack of financial maturity so also just fed up of being his mother and feeling like I have no help. Never contributed to anything hence the dog is mine as i have cared financialy and domesticly for the dog who is more attatched to me. Feel like I built our life alone. Bf wants to turn it around and make it work but I'm basically done and don't see it worth trying long distant and have been clear on that not that he accepts it. He still tries to act like we are together and staying together but is aware of my feelings.

Is it okay to have him over at my dad's for boxing day with me? He will be home alone otherwise, my dad lives alone and doesn't mind if he comes so don't want to be too mean as I'm already not having him come my mums for Xmas and I appreciate for him it seems like a big loss of precense over the Xmas time and he can't go to his families so while we are still living together I thought I'd offer.
"Is it okay to have him over at my dad's for boxing day with me?" - This is for you to decide gal, you must evaluate the pros and cons

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