The TSR Community Awards 2025 are now live >>

my life is hell, how do I make it half-decent

for context, I'm a 15 year old male in the us. my life, without exaggeration, is a rat hole. yep, I live somewhere that has rats, and so many that it makes me outright unable to sleep some nights. my parents smoke cigarettes, and ive (by some sort of divine intervention) avoided the everlasting urge to pick one up myself. so, let me summarize just so you have a clue who's random dialogue this is in general

-in poverty
-parents have nicotine addiction
-raaaaats, may as well call me the rat king (dont actually i do NOT need an ego boost)
-everyone has a caffeine addiction, this time including me
-my mental health is honestly so on the fritz that therapy is coming up
-not to mention my parents want to move to another state just so they can smoke a little more
--(sidenote: they refused to adknowledge i dont wanna move, even when i put it RIGHT IN FRONT OF THEIR FACES KUEHKEGRFKERUH)

soooo yeah, look up there and you see exaaaactly what makes my misery, pretty much cut to the bone since we're ignoring the smaller things because this is some forum site

now the big question i'm asking you
**how do i fix myself**
remember when i said my mental health was on the fritz?
i wasnt kidding, but hey
i cant be betrayed if i dont trust the alien lizard people surrounding me :biggrin:

(im not paranoid i swear that was a joke)

as you can guess, my tone on life is less "everything sucks :frown:

" and moreso "everything sucks :biggrin:

"

i assume it's a subconcious coping method, but what do i know?
im honestly only comfortable posting this here cause i trust yall wont track me down like some otherwordly spies. other than that, please, tell me how i can fix my liiiiiife
pls

Reply 1

Analyst89

I hope someone here who has more experience can help.

Maybe you can see your doctor and also local council, community center? Im sure they can help

Reply 2

Kathy89

Is there any support system available for you?
Can you go to work to save some money for yourself to help yourself in case no one is helping and money IS an (or the) issue?
A job can help you financially but also socially and emotionally, you need to get out of that place, at least for school and work...

Reply 3

PAPYRUS HOPELINE

Official Rep

Original post

by Anonymous

for context, I'm a 15 year old male in the us. my life, without exaggeration, is a rat hole. yep, I live somewhere that has rats, and so many that it makes me outright unable to sleep some nights. my parents smoke cigarettes, and ive (by some sort of divine intervention) avoided the everlasting urge to pick one up myself. so, let me summarize just so you have a clue who's random dialogue this is in general
-in poverty
-parents have nicotine addiction
-raaaaats, may as well call me the rat king (dont actually i do NOT need an ego boost)
-everyone has a caffeine addiction, this time including me
-my mental health is honestly so on the fritz that therapy is coming up
-not to mention my parents want to move to another state just so they can smoke a little more
--(sidenote: they refused to adknowledge i dont wanna move, even when i put it RIGHT IN FRONT OF THEIR FACES KUEHKEGRFKERUH)
soooo yeah, look up there and you see exaaaactly what makes my misery, pretty much cut to the bone since we're ignoring the smaller things because this is some forum site
now the big question i'm asking you
**how do i fix myself**
remember when i said my mental health was on the fritz?
i wasnt kidding, but hey
i cant be betrayed if i dont trust the alien lizard people surrounding me :biggrin:

(im not paranoid i swear that was a joke)
as you can guess, my tone on life is less "everything sucks :frown:

" and moreso "everything sucks :biggrin:

"
i assume it's a subconcious coping method, but what do i know?
im honestly only comfortable posting this here cause i trust yall wont track me down like some otherwordly spies. other than that, please, tell me how i can fix my liiiiiife
pls

Thank you for sharing what you're going through. It takes a lot of courage to talk about these tough feelings. What you’ve shared shows a lot of strength. Sometimes people cope with difficult situations by putting on a mask or using humour to make things feel a bit more manageable. It’s okay to joke about things to keep yourself going, but we also want to make sure you know that you don’t have to go through this alone.

There’s support out there for you. You've been dealing with a lot, and it’s clear. You’ve mentioned rats, your parents smoking, feeling trapped, and struggling with your mental health. These are all really hard things, and it’s normal to feel overwhelmed, frustrated, or like things might never get better. But there’s always hope, and there are steps you can take to start feeling better, even when it all feels impossible.

If everything feels overwhelming and you feel like there’s no way out, it’s crucial to reach out for support.
If you're ever in immediate danger or having thoughts of hurting yourself, please talk to someone you trust or contact a suicide prevention hotline. Your voice is important, and reaching out is a powerful step. Also, it’s okay to talk to your parents about how the move is affecting you. Your feelings and needs matter, even if it doesn’t always seem like they’re being heard. Being honest about your emotions is important, and even if things don’t change right away, standing up for yourself can make a difference.

Please take care of yourself. Remember, you’re not alone in this, and things can get better. Keep reaching out, whether it’s to a therapist, counsellor, or someone you trust. You deserve the support to get through this struggle.

Reply 4

Anonymous #2

Original post

by Anonymous

for context, I'm a 15 year old male in the us. my life, without exaggeration, is a rat hole. yep, I live somewhere that has rats, and so many that it makes me outright unable to sleep some nights. my parents smoke cigarettes, and ive (by some sort of divine intervention) avoided the everlasting urge to pick one up myself. so, let me summarize just so you have a clue who's random dialogue this is in general
-in poverty
-parents have nicotine addiction
-raaaaats, may as well call me the rat king (dont actually i do NOT need an ego boost)
-everyone has a caffeine addiction, this time including me
-my mental health is honestly so on the fritz that therapy is coming up
-not to mention my parents want to move to another state just so they can smoke a little more
--(sidenote: they refused to adknowledge i dont wanna move, even when i put it RIGHT IN FRONT OF THEIR FACES KUEHKEGRFKERUH)
soooo yeah, look up there and you see exaaaactly what makes my misery, pretty much cut to the bone since we're ignoring the smaller things because this is some forum site
now the big question i'm asking you
**how do i fix myself**
remember when i said my mental health was on the fritz?
i wasnt kidding, but hey
i cant be betrayed if i dont trust the alien lizard people surrounding me :biggrin:

(im not paranoid i swear that was a joke)
as you can guess, my tone on life is less "everything sucks :frown:

" and moreso "everything sucks :biggrin:

"
i assume it's a subconcious coping method, but what do i know?
im honestly only comfortable posting this here cause i trust yall wont track me down like some otherwordly spies. other than that, please, tell me how i can fix my liiiiiife
pls

My biggest advice is to change your view on the negatives in life- it sounds ironic but it does help.

Life was never promised to be good or bad but fate aligns our paths into good or bad experiences.

We as human beings have a tendency to focus on bad instead of the good- but what we forget to do is accept and move on.

Looking at your individual problems I will adress them all and what I would do in those situations (by no means am I suggesting that my viewpoint on these problems are the best options- but it’s just my stand.)

Poverty: You have not decided upon this willingly- your parents has made choices that has led you to be born into a family that is within poverty.

My outlook on this would be positive motivation to dedicate into succeeding in academics, focused on making money, which also provides you a task to get away from the cyclical nature of your mind you describe as depressive.

Whilst you can’t change poverty right now, you can for your future- which will take effort, but the right effort with the right mindset will help you break out of this cycle.

The rat situation- if there is any services that can be called within your budget- please do it as this is basic hygiene that is a human right is being neglected.

If nothing can be done- try researching into ways that this problem can be tackled or address the potential dangers of rats to your parents if they will understand you.

Caffeine addiction: I suffered from a very serious caffeine addiction ( I would consume over 4 red bulls a day, medium cans, and a litre of coffee daily for three years), this declined my health immensely to the point caffeine didn’t have an affect on me and led me to further intake higher levels due to my tolerance. I wasted over £4000 on this- looking back it was sheer stupidity of mine.

If you sleep at the times your meant too, feed your body with the correct nutrients you will not need to consume caffeine.

I’ve also came to conclusion that after I taking caffeine and suffering a sugar crash- my mental health also declined- which further led me to stop. This has helped me personally become better with mental illnesses and my body as I feel healthier and more free now. So I would recommend stopping caffeine intake.

Moving: moving and change is a part of life at the age of 15 we have no control over. Although it’s painful, makes you reset the work you have done, and also sets you back. There isn’t much to do when your parents are your legal guardian and can have the decision without you being able to control it. If your parents want to move, you will more than likely not be able to change their minds and therefore, will have to adapt.

Adaptation is a process that every mammal and animal goes through when they are surrounded by a new environment.

I would personally say in your position, if I was to move I would take it as a chance from the universe to restart myself, refresh and replenish my mental stability and become a better me. Not for anyone’s benefit but for mine. Negatives like this happen always, it about how you turn the negative into a positive with your outlook 🙂

Now finally, your mental health: TAKE CARE OF IT, the brain and body is a humans powerhouse, they make you make good decisions and choices in life.

The more choices you make without care do you to how be your mental health is, you will create deeper issues.

I suggest that you take time for your own mental health, stop worrying about moving, the caffeine that’s slowing you down physically and mentally, and prioritise yourself amidst all these challenges in your life. The only person you need in life is yourself, and when you have yourself you will be stronger than ever.

Conclusion: I know life can be rough, but the rough experiences mold you as an individual. I would take these horrible experiences, and view them as a lesson to never repeat and to learn from to find solutions for it in the future.

Everyone has a strong mind when they put to it, the more you look after your own health- that’s when you will see life clearer.

My advice overall is, life is a lesson good or bad every experience teaches us something new- it up to you what this teaches you.

Reply 5

username7394315

Original post

by Anonymous

for context, I'm a 15 year old male in the us. my life, without exaggeration, is a rat hole. yep, I live somewhere that has rats, and so many that it makes me outright unable to sleep some nights. my parents smoke cigarettes, and ive (by some sort of divine intervention) avoided the everlasting urge to pick one up myself. so, let me summarize just so you have a clue who's random dialogue this is in general
-in poverty
-parents have nicotine addiction
-raaaaats, may as well call me the rat king (dont actually i do NOT need an ego boost)
-everyone has a caffeine addiction, this time including me
-my mental health is honestly so on the fritz that therapy is coming up
-not to mention my parents want to move to another state just so they can smoke a little more
--(sidenote: they refused to adknowledge i dont wanna move, even when i put it RIGHT IN FRONT OF THEIR FACES KUEHKEGRFKERUH)
soooo yeah, look up there and you see exaaaactly what makes my misery, pretty much cut to the bone since we're ignoring the smaller things because this is some forum site
now the big question i'm asking you
**how do i fix myself**
remember when i said my mental health was on the fritz?
i wasnt kidding, but hey
i cant be betrayed if i dont trust the alien lizard people surrounding me :biggrin:

(im not paranoid i swear that was a joke)
as you can guess, my tone on life is less "everything sucks :frown:

" and moreso "everything sucks :biggrin:

"
i assume it's a subconcious coping method, but what do i know?
im honestly only comfortable posting this here cause i trust yall wont track me down like some otherwordly spies. other than that, please, tell me how i can fix my liiiiiife
pls

Heya, I'd suggest talking to your friends or making more so you have a good social network and safety net where you feel comfortable being yourself and have some others to lean on. Having someone around to help can really make the difference between being hopeless and having something worth living for, I'd know. I'd also suggest getting more hobbies or extra ciriculars so you're out of the house more and deal with your parents less (and the second hand nicotine which could definitely be affecting your state of mind). I've moved alot in my life, and honestly, i miss home more than ever and cry about it so much, so i completely understand the fear and awfulness of moving. One good thing is definitely that it gives you a chance to reinvent yourself and a fresh start, no one knows who you were and to them your going to be the mysterious new kid who everyone wants to befriend and know more about bcz ppl like the new and unknown and that's what you'll be to them, so you've already got a positive first impression. If you don't have a safety net to lean on, I'd be glad to do just that so dm me if you wanna and you can vent about your problems and I'll listen.