Can I take a break or move online?
Hi,
I just started university in October but I can’t handle it, I have Asperger’s and ADHD I’m too far from my mother I’m 5 hours by public transport from her. She’s the only family
I have and have ever had now she’s left completely alone in the house and she has heart issues she’s 50… I really can’t be this far away I can’t put my mind to studying or anything I just feel like I need to be with my mum. I have no friends and I sit in my room on call with my boyfriend who’s already broken up with me 3 times literally yesterday being the latest but he keeps coming back and if he goes again and I’m not with my mum idk what I’ll do I have a big past with sh and other thing and I really just need my mum. I’ve only just gotten back to university today but I can’t do it.
Is there any chance to go online with my course while being with mum or to stop for a year and come back I need time with her I can’t do this
I just started university in October but I can’t handle it, I have Asperger’s and ADHD I’m too far from my mother I’m 5 hours by public transport from her. She’s the only family
I have and have ever had now she’s left completely alone in the house and she has heart issues she’s 50… I really can’t be this far away I can’t put my mind to studying or anything I just feel like I need to be with my mum. I have no friends and I sit in my room on call with my boyfriend who’s already broken up with me 3 times literally yesterday being the latest but he keeps coming back and if he goes again and I’m not with my mum idk what I’ll do I have a big past with sh and other thing and I really just need my mum. I’ve only just gotten back to university today but I can’t do it.
Is there any chance to go online with my course while being with mum or to stop for a year and come back I need time with her I can’t do this
Hey, I am pretty sure that you could email your university and request a leave especially if you explain to them it is due to mental health issues and your mum's heart condition. Regarding your boyfriend sorry to say that but don't get back with him he sounds unstable if he keeps on breaking up with you several times. Maybe the time off will help you calm down and be able to see if you would like to return to your university or not there is always the option to study at Open university which is an online university which might better suit you.
Does your university run the same course as an online option? If so, switching should be allowed.
Original post by Koria
Hi,
I just started university in October but I can’t handle it, I have Asperger’s and ADHD I’m too far from my mother I’m 5 hours by public transport from her. She’s the only family
I have and have ever had now she’s left completely alone in the house and she has heart issues she’s 50… I really can’t be this far away I can’t put my mind to studying or anything I just feel like I need to be with my mum. I have no friends and I sit in my room on call with my boyfriend who’s already broken up with me 3 times literally yesterday being the latest but he keeps coming back and if he goes again and I’m not with my mum idk what I’ll do I have a big past with sh and other thing and I really just need my mum. I’ve only just gotten back to university today but I can’t do it.
Is there any chance to go online with my course while being with mum or to stop for a year and come back I need time with her I can’t do this
I just started university in October but I can’t handle it, I have Asperger’s and ADHD I’m too far from my mother I’m 5 hours by public transport from her. She’s the only family
I have and have ever had now she’s left completely alone in the house and she has heart issues she’s 50… I really can’t be this far away I can’t put my mind to studying or anything I just feel like I need to be with my mum. I have no friends and I sit in my room on call with my boyfriend who’s already broken up with me 3 times literally yesterday being the latest but he keeps coming back and if he goes again and I’m not with my mum idk what I’ll do I have a big past with sh and other thing and I really just need my mum. I’ve only just gotten back to university today but I can’t do it.
Is there any chance to go online with my course while being with mum or to stop for a year and come back I need time with her I can’t do this
Most unis will let you suspend you studies and take a temporary withdrawal. However restarting next year won't address any of your other issues, IE. You will still be enrolled at a uni that is far away, and your Mum will still have ill health. It might be worth considering whether you need to stay at home and be at a uni that is a commutable distance.
Agree with the comment above that your BF sounds needlessly disruptive. Breaking up multiple times a day isn't normal and there is a big question there if you should be dealing with that alongside your studies and caring responsibilities.
Reply 4
Original post by Koria
Hi,
I just started university in October but I can’t handle it, I have Asperger’s and ADHD I’m too far from my mother I’m 5 hours by public transport from her. She’s the only family
I have and have ever had now she’s left completely alone in the house and she has heart issues she’s 50… I really can’t be this far away I can’t put my mind to studying or anything I just feel like I need to be with my mum. I have no friends and I sit in my room on call with my boyfriend who’s already broken up with me 3 times literally yesterday being the latest but he keeps coming back and if he goes again and I’m not with my mum idk what I’ll do I have a big past with sh and other thing and I really just need my mum. I’ve only just gotten back to university today but I can’t do it.
Is there any chance to go online with my course while being with mum or to stop for a year and come back I need time with her I can’t do this
I just started university in October but I can’t handle it, I have Asperger’s and ADHD I’m too far from my mother I’m 5 hours by public transport from her. She’s the only family
I have and have ever had now she’s left completely alone in the house and she has heart issues she’s 50… I really can’t be this far away I can’t put my mind to studying or anything I just feel like I need to be with my mum. I have no friends and I sit in my room on call with my boyfriend who’s already broken up with me 3 times literally yesterday being the latest but he keeps coming back and if he goes again and I’m not with my mum idk what I’ll do I have a big past with sh and other thing and I really just need my mum. I’ve only just gotten back to university today but I can’t do it.
Is there any chance to go online with my course while being with mum or to stop for a year and come back I need time with her I can’t do this
Hello,
I am sorry to hear that you are currently having such a difficult time with everything which is currently going on in your life. It may be a good idea to reach out to your University's support services to see if they can assist you or advice you on your options. Also, have you informed your university of your ADHD and Aspergers/applied for the Disabled Students Allowance and associated support? Because of your disabilities, your university has a legal obligation to make reasonable adjustments providing you have informed them of your disabilities and so you may be able to get some support this way as well. For instance, they may be able to provide mentoring.
I hope this helps, if you have any further questions please do not hesitate to let me know.
Charlie
Law LLB Student
Reply 5
Original post by Koria
Hi,
I just started university in October but I can’t handle it, I have Asperger’s and ADHD I’m too far from my mother I’m 5 hours by public transport from her. She’s the only family
I have and have ever had now she’s left completely alone in the house and she has heart issues she’s 50… I really can’t be this far away I can’t put my mind to studying or anything I just feel like I need to be with my mum. I have no friends and I sit in my room on call with my boyfriend who’s already broken up with me 3 times literally yesterday being the latest but he keeps coming back and if he goes again and I’m not with my mum idk what I’ll do I have a big past with sh and other thing and I really just need my mum. I’ve only just gotten back to university today but I can’t do it.
Is there any chance to go online with my course while being with mum or to stop for a year and come back I need time with her I can’t do this
I just started university in October but I can’t handle it, I have Asperger’s and ADHD I’m too far from my mother I’m 5 hours by public transport from her. She’s the only family
I have and have ever had now she’s left completely alone in the house and she has heart issues she’s 50… I really can’t be this far away I can’t put my mind to studying or anything I just feel like I need to be with my mum. I have no friends and I sit in my room on call with my boyfriend who’s already broken up with me 3 times literally yesterday being the latest but he keeps coming back and if he goes again and I’m not with my mum idk what I’ll do I have a big past with sh and other thing and I really just need my mum. I’ve only just gotten back to university today but I can’t do it.
Is there any chance to go online with my course while being with mum or to stop for a year and come back I need time with her I can’t do this
Hi there,
We're really sorry to hear that your mum is unwell, and also that you've been struggling with relationship issues too. We imagine balancing that with your uni studies alongside ADHD/Asperger's has been incredibly difficult.
It sounds like it could be important to speak with your University support team and discuss your options so you can make the most informed decision for you, but also make sure they're aware of what you're struggling with (as much as you feel able to share) as they may be able to help you access further support if you're not already accessing it.
You mentioned that you've struggled with self-harm - if you feel you need support with this you may want to consider speaking to your GP, or Heads Above the Waves have some really helpful advice/resources that you might want to take a look at - https://hatw.co.uk/straight-up-advice/ -- as someone else has mentioned, whilst making a decision about your studies is important, it's also really important you're able to get some support with those things that are impacting you right now to ensure you're able to manage if/when you decided to continue studying or go back to studying face-to-face if that's something you move away from for now.
If you're ever struggling with thoughts of suicide, please know that HOPELINE247 are here to help. We can offer you a safe space to talk through what may be impacting those thoughts and support you to explore how to manage and keep yourself safe. We're available 24/7 - you can call on 0800 068 4141, text 'HOPE' to 88247, email [email protected] or webchat with us via our website www.papyrus-uk.org
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