Advice on losing virginity at 21

I get that it seems quite old to have not lost it but every time I get the chance I freak out and leave. I’m a lesbian so it took longer for me to start dating in general, I had my first kiss at 19 and have kissed a lot of girls in clubs and had a recent situation in a nightclub where I started making out with a girl and she wanted me to go back to hers but she went to find her bag from her friend whilst I waited outside…I saw my friends across the road and ran to them and said I wanted to leave and they walked with me back home. I feel bad about leaving like that but I was almost having a panic attack and was really drunk. I’ve seen the girl since and she always talks and is nice so I don’t think she really remembers.

Anyway- I worry about how to tell girls I’m still a virgin (I haven’t told my friends) especially if they’re a bit older. I’ve had talking stages with girls that are 24/25 but always self sabotage and get worried I’ll eventually have to have sex with them. I’m not asexual because I am sexually attracted to the women I talk to. Any advice please

Reply 1

Anonymous #2

The key is to always get physics. Make sure to touch a lot and then she will get the hint that you want to fuuuuck. I've tried this loads (with a 20% success rate) and this is a tried and true method and Im known as the top shagger in my school.

All the best in your mission soldier . make sure to be a school shooter if you fail to munch

Reply 2

stilllearning123

Original post

by Anonymous

The key is to always get physics. Make sure to touch a lot and then she will get the hint that you want to fuuuuck. I've tried this loads (with a 20% success rate) and this is a tried and true method and Im known as the top shagger in my school.
All the best in your mission soldier . make sure to be a school shooter if you fail to munch

"fuuuuck" I second this 💯💯

Reply 3

anosmianAcrimony

It's definitely worth talking about it in advance. Honestly, like most supposedly high stakes conversations, the anticipation is a lot more anxiety-provoking than the actual conversation about virginity and sex, or the act itself. Just get into it and start talking and things will get better. If you've picked the right girl, she will make you feel comfortable about the whole thing.

You might also think about reframing it a bit in your mind - where you've said "I get worried I'll eventually have to have sex with them" - and yet this is something that you actively want to do. I.e. it's not something you have to do, it's something you get to do; it's a really lovely privilege to get the opportunity to have sex with someone you like.

For the record I'm a bi guy and I lost my virginity with a guy at 23. 21 isn't very old to have not done it. You'll conquer your worries and your self-sabotage in the end.