i feel like im not doing enough

comparison is a big issue for me (as im sure it is for a lot of people) but whenever i compare myself to others my age (or even younger), they seem so much more accomplished than me: they've got like grade 8 across 3 different instruments, they took their gcses 2 years early, they're winning competitions left right and centre, oh and did i mention they probably represent wales across 3 different sports. also, they go to super competitive and academic schools (like csfc). i have more time on my hands yet my cv is nowhere as filled out as theirs is - i basically have no excuse for not being where they are at right now. it makes me feel really incompetent and inadequate and i can't help but feel like im not doing enough. anyone have any advice? should i just totally cut off all social media and just become a productivity machine?

(edited 2 months ago)

Reply 1

Isobel.jr06

8

I think social media definitely doesnt help and people will post what they want others to see and that will most likely be their accomplishments. Its easy to compare ourselves to others but we are all different and do things at different rates. You are in control of your life so if you want to be doing more then go for it but you don't need to just because others are. The things you mentioned aren't really that common, there will be so many people at a similar stage to you, they just may not post about it and talk about it as much so it doesnt seem that there are people at the same stage as you. Try to focus on you and where you are and what you want to be doing rather than others if you can. Hope this helps even if only a little!

Reply 2

black tea

19

Whenever I've felt like this is in the past, I would set myself goals that would lead to me achieving things that would make me feel like I'd accomplished something and work towards them. Granted, my goals were not representing my country in 3 different sports, but achieving them helped my self-esteem. Some examples are studying for an extra A-level in my own time, achieving first-aid qualifications, setting out to win prizes in uni projects and winning them etc.

Reply 3

PinkMobilePhone

Chat Forum Helper, Life & Style Forum Helper

22

Comparison is the thief of joy.

Unless these people pay your bills and buy you food, what they are doing has no bearing on your life whatsoever.

If Billy down the road passed all his gcses at the age of 12 and has won 55 trophies for sports and can play 9 instruments with his toes, how does that affect your life in any way, shape, or form?

Other people's achievements or failures are their own business. Your worth is not determined by comparing yourself to them.

Reply 4

PAPYRUS HOPELINE

Official Rep

9

Original post by aspiringavocado9

comparison is a big issue for me (as im sure it is for a lot of people) but whenever i compare myself to others my age (or even younger), they seem so much more accomplished than me: they've got like grade 8 across 3 different instruments, they took their gcses 2 years early, they're winning competitions left right and centre, oh and did i mention they probably represent wales across 3 different sports. also, they go to super competitive and academic schools (like csfc). i have more time on my hands yet my cv is nowhere as filled out as theirs is - i basically have no excuse for not being where they are at right now. it makes me feel really incompetent and inadequate and i can't help but feel like im not doing enough. anyone have any advice? should i just totally cut off all social media and just become a productivity machine?

Comparing ourselves to others is a normal human trait, but it feels like right now those comparisons are defining how you feel about yourself. What's important isn't what others' are doing or achieving, but what do you want for yourself? Where do you want to be right now realistically? What are the goals you have for your life? We don't all have to graduate early or win medals or change the world, what we do within our own world is important for us. Maybe there are those who look at your life and value your kindness, maybe they see traits and accomplishments you don't see. This article might support some learning in how to modify this mindset- https://achieveconcierge.com/the-impact-of-comparison-on-mental-health/ We hope you can see the positives within you, that maybe others are well aware of. If this is leading to you having any thoughts of suicide, please reach out to Hopeline247 on 0800 168 14 14 or text on 88247 and a trained suicide prevention adviser will speak to you and offer advice and support.

Reply 5

Analyst89

20

Original post by aspiringavocado9

comparison is a big issue for me (as im sure it is for a lot of people) but whenever i compare myself to others my age (or even younger), they seem so much more accomplished than me: they've got like grade 8 across 3 different instruments, they took their gcses 2 years early, they're winning competitions left right and centre, oh and did i mention they probably represent wales across 3 different sports. also, they go to super competitive and academic schools (like csfc). i have more time on my hands yet my cv is nowhere as filled out as theirs is - i basically have no excuse for not being where they are at right now. it makes me feel really incompetent and inadequate and i can't help but feel like im not doing enough. anyone have any advice? should i just totally cut off all social media and just become a productivity machine?

Everyone will have different level of accomplishments, achievements, success. And at different ages.

Some younger people earn more than me. I'm not bothered as I define my own success, worth and I like living the quiet life. I do not need expensive designer clothes.

What are your goals, ambitions, aspirations for life?

What makes you happy? What are your passions?

(edited 2 months ago)

i feel like im not doing enough

Quick Reply

Articles for you