The TSR Community Awards 2025 are now live >>

I Kinda Like My Best Friend

I’m 16, in my final year of secondary school, and recently I’ve started developing feelings for my best friend. The thing is, he’s gay, and I am a bi guy who has yet to come to anyone. I kind of started to earn feelings for him when we would jokingly nudge our legs against each other. But it was even more so when we walked home together one day and we just held hands and hugged and we jokingly tease eachother. However, I do love this and I really love him so much. I really want him in life and I wouldnt mind being in a relationship with him. I mean he has said what his type is and I dont really match with it but in some way I wouldnt mind being somewhat romantic with him. I dont want to ruin what we already have by one stupid little thing by me asking "Do you want to go out with me?" I do love him a lot and I want to say something but I also dont want to at the same time. Any advice?

Reply 1

UoL Students

Official Rep

Original post

by Anonymous

Hello,

I think this is actually surprisingly common to develop feelings for your best friend. I suppose they provide us with an overwhelming sense of joy and to some extent we happen to interpret them as having the qualities we look for in a romantic partner. I would go as far to suggest that even if your weren't attracted at first, when it comes to best friends it's not uncommon to develop feelings for them, especially as you get to know them more.

I would advise that because you have a really good best friend who you don't want to lose, try to keep boundaries by staying as best friends. Having said that, if he is anything like my best friend he may tell you that you can talk to him about everything. If you feel comfortable maybe this is something you should do but in the long term I feel that it is safer in general to stay as best friends because the alternative is you enter a relationship, it doesn't go well, you break up and never speak again leaving you with a big whole in your heart having lost a romantic partner and best friend.

I hope this helps, if you have any further questions please do let me know.

Charlie
Law LLB Student