Gym crush didn’t reply to DM
So I met a really pretty girl at the gym, we spoke for 20+ minutes whilst working out together using the same equipment. After, I asked for her instagram and she said yes so we added each other. Once I got home from the gym, I sent her a DM saying “Hey it was great to meet you today 
”
she didn’t reply she just gave a thumbs up “reaction” to my message. Like she didn’t even reply with a thumbs up it was just a reaction.. I feel reactions are such a huge rejection like the fact you need to click in the message and chose a thumbs up reaction to the message takes way longer than just taking 2 second to quickly reply. It feels like she’s deliberately telling me no.
But idk if I’m overreacting?
But why would she follow me back on instagram, she doesn’t follow a lot of people so seems weird for her to add me back if she wasn’t interested. Should I wait a few days and try message her again, maybe I can make the next message a bit more specific like a question, so she has to reply. Or is it a game over rejection?
” she didn’t reply she just gave a thumbs up “reaction” to my message. Like she didn’t even reply with a thumbs up it was just a reaction.. I feel reactions are such a huge rejection like the fact you need to click in the message and chose a thumbs up reaction to the message takes way longer than just taking 2 second to quickly reply. It feels like she’s deliberately telling me no.
But idk if I’m overreacting?
But why would she follow me back on instagram, she doesn’t follow a lot of people so seems weird for her to add me back if she wasn’t interested. Should I wait a few days and try message her again, maybe I can make the next message a bit more specific like a question, so she has to reply. Or is it a game over rejection?
She may have followed you back on Instagram just to be polite.
If I were in your shoes I would directly suggest some activity for you guys to do together and if she says no to that, or equivocates ("maybe some other time" etc) then take that as the polite rejection it is.
If I were in your shoes I would directly suggest some activity for you guys to do together and if she says no to that, or equivocates ("maybe some other time" etc) then take that as the polite rejection it is.
Original post by Anonymous
So I met a really pretty girl at the gym, we spoke for 20+ minutes whilst working out together using the same equipment. After, I asked for her instagram and she said yes so we added each other. Once I got home from the gym, I sent her a DM saying “Hey it was great to meet you today ”
she didn’t reply she just gave a thumbs up “reaction” to my message. Like she didn’t even reply with a thumbs up it was just a reaction.. I feel reactions are such a huge rejection like the fact you need to click in the message and chose a thumbs up reaction to the message takes way longer than just taking 2 second to quickly reply. It feels like she’s deliberately telling me no.
But idk if I’m overreacting?
But why would she follow me back on instagram, she doesn’t follow a lot of people so seems weird for her to add me back if she wasn’t interested. Should I wait a few days and try message her again, maybe I can make the next message a bit more specific like a question, so she has to reply. Or is it a game over rejection?
” she didn’t reply she just gave a thumbs up “reaction” to my message. Like she didn’t even reply with a thumbs up it was just a reaction.. I feel reactions are such a huge rejection like the fact you need to click in the message and chose a thumbs up reaction to the message takes way longer than just taking 2 second to quickly reply. It feels like she’s deliberately telling me no.
But idk if I’m overreacting?
But why would she follow me back on instagram, she doesn’t follow a lot of people so seems weird for her to add me back if she wasn’t interested. Should I wait a few days and try message her again, maybe I can make the next message a bit more specific like a question, so she has to reply. Or is it a game over rejection?
Generally speaking, a "thumbs up" reaction is just used to show an acknowledgement that the message has been seen, basically, she's cool with it, but (for whatever reason) can't or can't be asked to engage in conversation. It's a bit like on here... when you give someone a "rep" or "like"; you're saying you've seen a message or that you agree with what they're saying... but it's not worth writing a long essay explaining the "How's" and "Why's" etc.
TBH, I think you're reading into this a bit too much. If she was deliberately telling you "no", she'd have ignored your message completely (and possibly blocked you... and changed her gym timetable)… but then again, saying "no" to what exactly? Did you honestly get the vibe she was interested when you were talking? Were you flirting or was it just friendly? Realistically speaking, if she's as pretty as you say she is, she's probably getting a lot of attention, and some girls are just nice to any guy who seems to like them (after all, even if you don't fancy them back, it's still a nice compliment (unless they're being "creepy" lol)). Be honest, were there any specific words / behaviour etc. that made you think she was genuinely interested in you, and not just being friendly / polite?
Just play it by ear... after all Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus 🤣
Original post by anosmianAcrimony
She may have followed you back on Instagram just to be polite.
If I were in your shoes I would directly suggest some activity for you guys to do together and if she says no to that, or equivocates ("maybe some other time" etc) then take that as the polite rejection it is.
If I were in your shoes I would directly suggest some activity for you guys to do together and if she says no to that, or equivocates ("maybe some other time" etc) then take that as the polite rejection it is.
Personally, I would leave the ball in her court; if she's at all interested, she'll message or otherwise get in contact at some point. Worst case scenario, talk to her again at the gym and gauge the vibe you have, and go from there. After all, this is not really any different to the other neurotics who over-think things when they don't get an instant reply to a text they sent. Maybe she's just evaluating her options... you don't know who else she's met at the gym or elsewhere, and you don't want to blow a chance by seeming desperate or coming on too strong.
(edited 1 month ago)
Original post by Anonymous
So I met a really pretty girl at the gym, we spoke for 20+ minutes whilst working out together using the same equipment. After, I asked for her instagram and she said yes so we added each other. Once I got home from the gym, I sent her a DM saying “Hey it was great to meet you today ”
she didn’t reply she just gave a thumbs up “reaction” to my message. Like she didn’t even reply with a thumbs up it was just a reaction.. I feel reactions are such a huge rejection like the fact you need to click in the message and chose a thumbs up reaction to the message takes way longer than just taking 2 second to quickly reply. It feels like she’s deliberately telling me no.
But idk if I’m overreacting?
But why would she follow me back on instagram, she doesn’t follow a lot of people so seems weird for her to add me back if she wasn’t interested. Should I wait a few days and try message her again, maybe I can make the next message a bit more specific like a question, so she has to reply. Or is it a game over rejection?
” she didn’t reply she just gave a thumbs up “reaction” to my message. Like she didn’t even reply with a thumbs up it was just a reaction.. I feel reactions are such a huge rejection like the fact you need to click in the message and chose a thumbs up reaction to the message takes way longer than just taking 2 second to quickly reply. It feels like she’s deliberately telling me no.
But idk if I’m overreacting?
But why would she follow me back on instagram, she doesn’t follow a lot of people so seems weird for her to add me back if she wasn’t interested. Should I wait a few days and try message her again, maybe I can make the next message a bit more specific like a question, so she has to reply. Or is it a game over rejection?
sounds like she probably felt pressured to say yes/didn't want to seem mean when you asked for her insta but she's not interested
It's 50/50. Taking the approach you did is a very high risk strategy. You will know if she likes you because she will be at the gym and act friendly to you next time you see her. If she vanishes from the gym when you usually go there or ignores you then no, she isn't into you. I personally wouldn't write to her on Instagram though, just wait until you next see her at the gym.
What was the nature of your 20 minute conversation?
Did you tease her or flirt with her?
Or was it just a job interview type conversation? Or a very neutral type conversation?
Did you find out what she was doing after the work-out? To establish if you could go on a date with her after the gym?
Did you get her agreement that she should meet up with you again? Or hang out with you sometime? Or do something with you? Before you asked for her contact details?
Did you continue the conversation after you got her insta?
At the moment she's a highly provisional. Talk to her next time you see her. See how she reacts.
How many other provisional women do you have in your life now? If it's 0 or 1 or 2 look into that. Put yourself out there more. Break the ice with more people. Look to improve how you speak and interact with them so that you come across as more attractive to your target audience.
Did you tease her or flirt with her?
Or was it just a job interview type conversation? Or a very neutral type conversation?
Did you find out what she was doing after the work-out? To establish if you could go on a date with her after the gym?
Did you get her agreement that she should meet up with you again? Or hang out with you sometime? Or do something with you? Before you asked for her contact details?
Did you continue the conversation after you got her insta?
At the moment she's a highly provisional. Talk to her next time you see her. See how she reacts.
How many other provisional women do you have in your life now? If it's 0 or 1 or 2 look into that. Put yourself out there more. Break the ice with more people. Look to improve how you speak and interact with them so that you come across as more attractive to your target audience.
Original post by Zarek
It suggests she just wants to be friends. So a rejection but not as bad as no response at all. It likely she gets lots of people sliding in to her DMs
Agreed (PRSOM BTW).
As I said earlier, even if she doesn't fancy him back, I'm sure she still appreciates the compliment / ego boost.
@Anon #1 Unless you're something special yourself (or you made a really good and unique impression in your chat), it's unlikely that she's interested (especially if there's been no contact up until now... and she's "really pretty" (your words) so may have had even more followers now)).
But still... we can only go on what you've posted... so maybe you can still play it by ear (if there's some amazing secret or development you haven't told us about lol.)
(edited 1 month ago)
Quick Reply
Related discussions
- KCl accom swap- canada water to great dover street/stamford street apartments/orchard
- london accommodation takeover
- IQ Bristol Tenancy Takeover 2024-25 ASAP
- KCL Tenancy Takeover Hayloft Point
- London Student Accommodation Takeover Urbanest Westminster
- Law friends .
- Student Tenancy Takeover needed in Nottingham for 23/24
- Advice about getting over a crush?
- where can I apply with these stats??
- univ of kent 2024/2025 Parkwood flats - kemsdale court
- Healthcare course applications
- Why girls never say Hi first to a boy even she like him?
- Need student accommodation London
- Is anyone staying at Great Dover Street Apartments currently?
- How tf do u move on
- Urbanest westminster bridge -accomodation takeover
- london accommodation help! please
- URGENT - Takeover accommodation near UCL
- Chemistry amount of substance question
- Leicester studio room release
Latest
Trending
Last reply 1 month ago
Engineering vs. Medicine: Stuck Between Dreams and ExpectationsLast reply 1 month ago
heyyy , im new heree and im willing to have some friends xxxLast reply 1 month ago
Im 16 and never had a gf and it doesnt feel ok.
