Can anyone grade my english lang paper 1 question 2

(my exam is on monday wish me luckkk 😖😖)
EXTRACT:
Mr fisher remembered a time - surely, not so long ago - when books were golden, when imaginations soared, when the world was filled with stories which ran like gazelles and pounced like tigers and exploded like rockets, illuminating minds and hearts. He had seen it happen; had seen whole classes swept away in the fever. In those days, there were heroes; there were dragons and dinosaurs; there were space adventures and soldiers of fortune and giant apes. In those days, thought Mr Fisher, we dreamed in colour, though films were in black and white, and good always triumphed in the end.
MY ANSWER:
The writer uses tripartite to convey how Mr Fisher believes stories from the past are far more creative. "stories which ran like gazelles and pounced like tigers and exploded like tigers". Here, the writer's use of tripartite emphasises how deeply he believes that stories from the past were better than those from the present. "Ran like gazelles", the writers use also uses zoomorphism to exaggerate just how creative the stories and books used to be.
Furthermore, the writer uses personification "illuminating minds and hearts", to illustrate how Mr Fisher believes books used to warm "minds and hearts", but they no longer do that. This is reiterated further down the paragraph "swept away in the fever", here the metaphorical phrase is used to show the reader how the books from the past used to completely immerse people in its vivid imagery and creativity.

I don't know what grade this would get but I can give some general feedback.
I think you're use of technical vocabulary is great and you can pick out literary techniques effectively, however I think you need to go into more detail or just be more specific when describing the impact of the techniques. How does the use of tripartite emphasise that stories from the past were better? Is it because of the use of various verbs which suggest action and excitement, or the reference to various wild animals which shows the wild nature of the stories. Also, I would not use the word "emphasise" in your first explanation, as first you need to prove your point before you can emphasise it. Also, "the writers use also uses" does not make sense.
In your second paragraph, I would explain how the quote uses personification if that is what you believe, as objects can also illuminate things. It is definitely a metaphor but I'm not sure I'd call it personification. However, you have great use of an embedded quote with "minds and hearts".
Overall, I think you have good points, you chose great quotations, and your paragraphs are structured well. To improve, I'd make sure you really explain your points in more specific detail, rather than making quite vague statements without explaining how the quote or literary technique you chose proves what you're saying.
I hope this helps!