So bored on gap year
I have no friends rn bc everyone is currently at uni and busy, and I do have hobbies but it’s 6 months into my gap year and I’m kind of sick of everything. I want to learn how to code or pick up new skills but I also have really bad adhd and struggle to do even the most basic tasks. I am dying of boredom and honestly really lonely, and need something to fill my time with.
Here’s some things I already do:
Watch tv shows
Watch movies
Read books
Play guitar
Gym occasionally
I feel like I really need a purpose rn, and want to do something productive with my time to upskill myself. I just struggle to hold myself accountable. Does any one have any advice on how to meet new people, make new friends my age (I’m 22), or tips on managing my adhd/procrastination when it comes to work related activities.
I genuinely feel like such a massive loser rn and don’t know how to get myself out of this hole I’m in.
Here’s some things I already do:
Watch tv shows
Watch movies
Read books
Play guitar
Gym occasionally
I feel like I really need a purpose rn, and want to do something productive with my time to upskill myself. I just struggle to hold myself accountable. Does any one have any advice on how to meet new people, make new friends my age (I’m 22), or tips on managing my adhd/procrastination when it comes to work related activities.
I genuinely feel like such a massive loser rn and don’t know how to get myself out of this hole I’m in.
Reply 1
21
Getting a job would solve most of those issues
Reply 2
11
Original post
by ALEreappGetting a job would solve most of those issues
I have been applying to loads of places for retail or coffee shop or receptionist jobs and I’m literally getting rejected by everything
Reply 3
I can relate to this. I am someone that has always found a rigid environment (such as school or a workplace) helps keep me on the straight and narrow as it were; you have deadlines and people to check up on you. I too struggle to be accountable to myself in free times and when you have a lot of time on your hands and nothing to really fill it (except for your hobbies, which you'd find time for even if you were busy) it can be really easy to succumb to these sorts of feelings. I've found it helpful to set myself a to do list of practical/productive tasks each day. It doesn't even need to be anything major, it can just be chores or things that you'd usually put off. Completing those tasks and ticking off the to do list gives me a sense of achievement and makes it easier to then engage with my hobbies afterwards.
It may also help to just get out of the house sometimes. Sit in a coffee shop to read rather than reading at home, take yourself to the cinema instead of watching a movie at home. The change of scenery can be good and it is possible that you would observe other people in your age bracket also on their own; it could be an opportunity to strike up a conversation (I know, that's easier said than done) or someone may approach you.
Lastly if you have kept in touch with people you were at school with or grew up as friends with, just making sure to keep in touch and letting them know that you have time and can accommodate meeting on their schedule (if they're working or studying) should hopefully enable you to make some plans and that could give you something to look forward to.
It may also help to just get out of the house sometimes. Sit in a coffee shop to read rather than reading at home, take yourself to the cinema instead of watching a movie at home. The change of scenery can be good and it is possible that you would observe other people in your age bracket also on their own; it could be an opportunity to strike up a conversation (I know, that's easier said than done) or someone may approach you.
Lastly if you have kept in touch with people you were at school with or grew up as friends with, just making sure to keep in touch and letting them know that you have time and can accommodate meeting on their schedule (if they're working or studying) should hopefully enable you to make some plans and that could give you something to look forward to.
Hello there!
First of all, I just want to say, you’re definitely not a loser for feeling this way. Taking a gap year can be really isolating, especially when everyone else seems to be busy with uni life. What you're feeling is valid, and you're not alone. A lot of people go through this kind of emotional dip, especially around the halfway mark of a gap year when the novelty wears off and you start craving something more fulfilling.
You already do a lot, like reading, music, the gym, so just try not to downplay that. But I understand, it doesn’t feel like enough when you’re missing connection and a sense of direction.
If you're looking to learn coding, that’s a great idea, especially since it can open doors career-wise.
Try using tools like Pomodoro timers or ADHD-friendly planners like GoblinTools or Notion templates with small, low-pressure goals. You don’t have to code for hours a day. Start trying 20 minutes every other day, and celebrate just starting.
For meeting people, look into local classes, workshops, or co-working spaces. If you’re open to online options, Discord communities, Reddit subs like r/gapyear, or even group projects on GitHub (if you're into learning coding) can help you connect with others in the same boat. There are also apps like Meetup where people your age are looking to make new friends too.
Regarding your purpose, sometimes that doesn’t come from one big goal, but from doing small things consistently. Maybe start a little personal blog about your gap year journey or ADHD management tips, or create something with your guitar skills, anything that gives you a sense of progress and self-expression.
You’re not behind. You’re figuring things out in your own time, and that’s completely okay. The fact that you’re reflecting and actively looking for a way forward already shows strength.
Be kind to yourself, and take things one small step at a time! You’ll get through this!
I hope this helps!
Wishing you all the best!
Kind regards,
Reka - Coventry University Student Ambassador
First of all, I just want to say, you’re definitely not a loser for feeling this way. Taking a gap year can be really isolating, especially when everyone else seems to be busy with uni life. What you're feeling is valid, and you're not alone. A lot of people go through this kind of emotional dip, especially around the halfway mark of a gap year when the novelty wears off and you start craving something more fulfilling.
You already do a lot, like reading, music, the gym, so just try not to downplay that. But I understand, it doesn’t feel like enough when you’re missing connection and a sense of direction.
If you're looking to learn coding, that’s a great idea, especially since it can open doors career-wise.
Try using tools like Pomodoro timers or ADHD-friendly planners like GoblinTools or Notion templates with small, low-pressure goals. You don’t have to code for hours a day. Start trying 20 minutes every other day, and celebrate just starting.
For meeting people, look into local classes, workshops, or co-working spaces. If you’re open to online options, Discord communities, Reddit subs like r/gapyear, or even group projects on GitHub (if you're into learning coding) can help you connect with others in the same boat. There are also apps like Meetup where people your age are looking to make new friends too.
Regarding your purpose, sometimes that doesn’t come from one big goal, but from doing small things consistently. Maybe start a little personal blog about your gap year journey or ADHD management tips, or create something with your guitar skills, anything that gives you a sense of progress and self-expression.
You’re not behind. You’re figuring things out in your own time, and that’s completely okay. The fact that you’re reflecting and actively looking for a way forward already shows strength.
Be kind to yourself, and take things one small step at a time! You’ll get through this!
I hope this helps!
Wishing you all the best!
Kind regards,
Reka - Coventry University Student Ambassador
Reply 5
Original post
by MamaagirlbehinduI have no friends rn bc everyone is currently at uni and busy, and I do have hobbies but it’s 6 months into my gap year and I’m kind of sick of everything. I want to learn how to code or pick up new skills but I also have really bad adhd and struggle to do even the most basic tasks. I am dying of boredom and honestly really lonely, and need something to fill my time with.
Here’s some things I already do:
Watch tv shows
Watch movies
Read books
Play guitar
Gym occasionally
I feel like I really need a purpose rn, and want to do something productive with my time to upskill myself. I just struggle to hold myself accountable. Does any one have any advice on how to meet new people, make new friends my age (I’m 22), or tips on managing my adhd/procrastination when it comes to work related activities.
I genuinely feel like such a massive loser rn and don’t know how to get myself out of this hole I’m in.
Here’s some things I already do:
Watch tv shows
Watch movies
Read books
Play guitar
Gym occasionally
I feel like I really need a purpose rn, and want to do something productive with my time to upskill myself. I just struggle to hold myself accountable. Does any one have any advice on how to meet new people, make new friends my age (I’m 22), or tips on managing my adhd/procrastination when it comes to work related activities.
I genuinely feel like such a massive loser rn and don’t know how to get myself out of this hole I’m in.
Learning to code is good but it can get boring, you can learn a language too but its the same problem.
Going to the gym or joining a small club or even just a fitness class may help you talk to people.
Reply 6
18
Go volunteer, it will let you talk to people and feel less isolated as well as helping the people you're helping. Otherwise party at yours every weekend with everyone here invited? 
Reply 7
11
Original post
by SpanxGo volunteer, it will let you talk to people and feel less isolated as well as helping the people you're helping. Otherwise party at yours every weekend with everyone here invited?
Yh volunteering sounds like the best idea so far! I’ve started tutoring and have kept applying for jobs in the meanwhile which is keeping me busy. And haha yes I honestly wish, can’t remember the last time I’ve been to a party
Reply 8
11
Original post
by Coventry University Student AmbassadorsHello there!
First of all, I just want to say, you’re definitely not a loser for feeling this way. Taking a gap year can be really isolating, especially when everyone else seems to be busy with uni life. What you're feeling is valid, and you're not alone. A lot of people go through this kind of emotional dip, especially around the halfway mark of a gap year when the novelty wears off and you start craving something more fulfilling.
You already do a lot, like reading, music, the gym, so just try not to downplay that. But I understand, it doesn’t feel like enough when you’re missing connection and a sense of direction.
If you're looking to learn coding, that’s a great idea, especially since it can open doors career-wise.
Try using tools like Pomodoro timers or ADHD-friendly planners like GoblinTools or Notion templates with small, low-pressure goals. You don’t have to code for hours a day. Start trying 20 minutes every other day, and celebrate just starting.
For meeting people, look into local classes, workshops, or co-working spaces. If you’re open to online options, Discord communities, Reddit subs like r/gapyear, or even group projects on GitHub (if you're into learning coding) can help you connect with others in the same boat. There are also apps like Meetup where people your age are looking to make new friends too.
Regarding your purpose, sometimes that doesn’t come from one big goal, but from doing small things consistently. Maybe start a little personal blog about your gap year journey or ADHD management tips, or create something with your guitar skills, anything that gives you a sense of progress and self-expression.
You’re not behind. You’re figuring things out in your own time, and that’s completely okay. The fact that you’re reflecting and actively looking for a way forward already shows strength.
Be kind to yourself, and take things one small step at a time! You’ll get through this!
I hope this helps!
Wishing you all the best!
Kind regards,
Reka - Coventry University Student Ambassador
First of all, I just want to say, you’re definitely not a loser for feeling this way. Taking a gap year can be really isolating, especially when everyone else seems to be busy with uni life. What you're feeling is valid, and you're not alone. A lot of people go through this kind of emotional dip, especially around the halfway mark of a gap year when the novelty wears off and you start craving something more fulfilling.
You already do a lot, like reading, music, the gym, so just try not to downplay that. But I understand, it doesn’t feel like enough when you’re missing connection and a sense of direction.
If you're looking to learn coding, that’s a great idea, especially since it can open doors career-wise.
Try using tools like Pomodoro timers or ADHD-friendly planners like GoblinTools or Notion templates with small, low-pressure goals. You don’t have to code for hours a day. Start trying 20 minutes every other day, and celebrate just starting.
For meeting people, look into local classes, workshops, or co-working spaces. If you’re open to online options, Discord communities, Reddit subs like r/gapyear, or even group projects on GitHub (if you're into learning coding) can help you connect with others in the same boat. There are also apps like Meetup where people your age are looking to make new friends too.
Regarding your purpose, sometimes that doesn’t come from one big goal, but from doing small things consistently. Maybe start a little personal blog about your gap year journey or ADHD management tips, or create something with your guitar skills, anything that gives you a sense of progress and self-expression.
You’re not behind. You’re figuring things out in your own time, and that’s completely okay. The fact that you’re reflecting and actively looking for a way forward already shows strength.
Be kind to yourself, and take things one small step at a time! You’ll get through this!
I hope this helps!
Wishing you all the best!
Kind regards,
Reka - Coventry University Student Ambassador
Thank you for the help! I’ll give all of those a look for sure. I’ve been feeling a little less lonely since the Easter holidays have started my friends are finally home from uni, so I can at least catch up with them for now.
I’ve also been going to therapy, which has definitely helped me feel less bad about myself and where I’m at in life
Reply 9
11
Original post
by cherrycosmosGet a job or if you can't - do some volunteering for charities, hospitals etc.
Learning to code is good but it can get boring, you can learn a language too but its the same problem.
Going to the gym or joining a small club or even just a fitness class may help you talk to people.
Learning to code is good but it can get boring, you can learn a language too but its the same problem.
Going to the gym or joining a small club or even just a fitness class may help you talk to people.
Yh if I’m being real, this is probably the last couple months I have to myself before I start working full time, I should probably try enjoy myself as much as possible instead of learn to code haha.
I will give a look at volunteering though thank you! And I’ve started going gym again regularly, I don’t have the confidence to speak to anyone but ig just being around people does help.
Reply 10
11
Original post
by Jonah RamoneI can relate to this. I am someone that has always found a rigid environment (such as school or a workplace) helps keep me on the straight and narrow as it were; you have deadlines and people to check up on you. I too struggle to be accountable to myself in free times and when you have a lot of time on your hands and nothing to really fill it (except for your hobbies, which you'd find time for even if you were busy) it can be really easy to succumb to these sorts of feelings. I've found it helpful to set myself a to do list of practical/productive tasks each day. It doesn't even need to be anything major, it can just be chores or things that you'd usually put off. Completing those tasks and ticking off the to do list gives me a sense of achievement and makes it easier to then engage with my hobbies afterwards.
It may also help to just get out of the house sometimes. Sit in a coffee shop to read rather than reading at home, take yourself to the cinema instead of watching a movie at home. The change of scenery can be good and it is possible that you would observe other people in your age bracket also on their own; it could be an opportunity to strike up a conversation (I know, that's easier said than done) or someone may approach you.
Lastly if you have kept in touch with people you were at school with or grew up as friends with, just making sure to keep in touch and letting them know that you have time and can accommodate meeting on their schedule (if they're working or studying) should hopefully enable you to make some plans and that could give you something to look forward to.
It may also help to just get out of the house sometimes. Sit in a coffee shop to read rather than reading at home, take yourself to the cinema instead of watching a movie at home. The change of scenery can be good and it is possible that you would observe other people in your age bracket also on their own; it could be an opportunity to strike up a conversation (I know, that's easier said than done) or someone may approach you.
Lastly if you have kept in touch with people you were at school with or grew up as friends with, just making sure to keep in touch and letting them know that you have time and can accommodate meeting on their schedule (if they're working or studying) should hopefully enable you to make some plans and that could give you something to look forward to.
Thank you for the advice
The point about having a small list of productive things to do each day has been super helpful recently. Even running one errand and getting that ticked off the todo list makes me feel better about my day I’ve found.
I think I’m learning to stop letting social situations or having friends define my worth. It’s normal to be alone for a while and I honestly feel better now that I’m not beating myself up about it. It’s peaceful if anything.
Reply 11
11
Also another update, I started crocheting too around a month ago and that pretty much takes up hours of my day haha I’m obsessed.
It’s super peaceful and makes me feel like I’m still being productive while doing something I actually enjoy. I try a different project every week, so I’ve always got something to do during the day.
It could be the crocheting or the good weather but I’ve been feeling much happier recently so I’m very grateful. Thank you everyone for all of the advice!
It’s super peaceful and makes me feel like I’m still being productive while doing something I actually enjoy. I try a different project every week, so I’ve always got something to do during the day.
It could be the crocheting or the good weather but I’ve been feeling much happier recently so I’m very grateful. Thank you everyone for all of the advice!
Reply 12
Original post
by MamaagirlbehinduI have no friends rn bc everyone is currently at uni and busy, and I do have hobbies but it’s 6 months into my gap year and I’m kind of sick of everything. I want to learn how to code or pick up new skills but I also have really bad adhd and struggle to do even the most basic tasks. I am dying of boredom and honestly really lonely, and need something to fill my time with.
Here’s some things I already do:
Watch tv shows
Watch movies
Read books
Play guitar
Gym occasionally
I feel like I really need a purpose rn, and want to do something productive with my time to upskill myself. I just struggle to hold myself accountable. Does any one have any advice on how to meet new people, make new friends my age (I’m 22), or tips on managing my adhd/procrastination when it comes to work related activities.
I genuinely feel like such a massive loser rn and don’t know how to get myself out of this hole I’m in.
Here’s some things I already do:
Watch tv shows
Watch movies
Read books
Play guitar
Gym occasionally
I feel like I really need a purpose rn, and want to do something productive with my time to upskill myself. I just struggle to hold myself accountable. Does any one have any advice on how to meet new people, make new friends my age (I’m 22), or tips on managing my adhd/procrastination when it comes to work related activities.
I genuinely feel like such a massive loser rn and don’t know how to get myself out of this hole I’m in.
There’s free coding courses available sometimes, and they are credited. Should have a look. + get a job
Quick Reply
Related discussions
- Peterhouse offer holders?
- Gap Year A-Level Advice Needed
- Positives & negatives of a gap year?
- Need help on what I should do?
- Warwick Cyber Security Bsc 2026?
- feel really lost in college rn.
- Second gap year advice?
- Best degrees to do before Dentistry
- uni or job?
- Feeling lost on a gap year
- DHT gap year advice pls!!!
- 18 y/o want to start a cybersecurity/AI business but don’t know where to begin — need
- Regretting not applying for Cambridge HSPS
- Pharmacy or optometry I don’t know what to go for there’s not much time
- AMA about uni :)
- am i making a mistake?
- What are your post-results day plans? Any exciting activities? Share below! 🥳
- Access Course - Medicine
- Surrey vs Exeter vs Lancaster for Computer Science
- Resits
Latest
Trending
Last reply 2 months ago
How to take a Gap Year on a budget? (travelling, internships, part-time) Alevels2025
How The Student Room is moderated
To keep The Student Room safe for everyone, we moderate posts that are added to the site.
