Could someone mark my poetry comparison answer please?

I do GCSE edexcel english literature and I'd appreciate any feedback as well as a mark out of 20. The question is: Compare how the poets present identity in Class Game and one other poem of your choice [20 marks]

Answer:

In the poems The Class Game (written by Mary Casey) and No Problem (written by Benjamin Zephaniah), the poets explore themes of social identity and prejudice. However they also show differences between them in terms of context, language, structure and form in the poem.

Both in The Class Game and No Problem show frustration when their identity is being stereotyped. For example, in The Class Game, the speaker repeats the line ''How can you tell what class I'm from?". Here, the refrain reflects the speakers frustration to those who constantly stereotype her. She repeats this line to challenge the reader to stop judging people based off their appearance or the way they act. We can see the speaker further challenging the reader through the line "Have a label on me head and another on me bum?", by using colloquial language, she highlights her origins and shows how she experienced being labelled just because of the way she talks. This can also create a sarcastic tone which could make the reader reflect on how they act towards the working class. We can link this to the context of this poem as Casey was a working-class house wife living in Liverpool, so she might've been treated badly due to her class. Similarly in No Problem, the speaker shows frustration by saying "I am not the de problem" which is a refrain, highlighting that he isn't the problem but the racist people are. The pronoun 'I' indicates that this poem is personal, showing it's one of the poets experiences. He then responds to the racist abuse by saying "Yu put me in a pigeon hole but I am versatile". The idiom used indicates that the speaker hasn't been treated with normal respect given to humans but he is able to show his resilience by putting on a brave face despite the racism. It shows that he doesn't let the racism get to him. The reader might feel inspired by him as the speaker is able to ignore the racist comments towards him.

However, in The Class Game, Casey explores identity through class while in No Problem, Zephaniah explores identity through racism. For example, in The Class Game, the speaker says her ''hands are stained with toil? Instead of soft lily-white perfume and oil?''. Here, the juxtaposition demonstrates the difference between the working and upper class which could show the attitudes of the 2 classes. We can also see this difference in the quote ''say 'Tara to me Ma' instead of 'Bye mummy dear'?'' which here, the colloquial language seems to state that the working class are associated with slang while the upper class talks in a posh manner. This could reveal that the speaker feels distanced from the rest of society she lives in. The reader might feel sympathy for the speaker as stereotyping causes separation between the two classes. In contrast, No Problem explores identity through racism as it states ''But dey got me on the run now I am branded athletic''. Here, we can see references to stereotyping which suggests that the teachers are labelling him as unacademic and athletic which is in line with the stereotypes to black people. Zephaniah uses phonetic spelling in 'dey' to reflect the speech habits of Afro Caribbeans. This criticises those who are stereotyping the speaker as he ignores the stereotypes and doesn't change himself to go against them, which highlights his pride. He also states ''sum of me best friends are white'' which again criticises the stereotypes but here, Zephaniah creates a humorous tone. This shows that he is able to end on a funny note despite the dark and heavy topics the speaker talked about in the poem. This could reflect Zephaniah's background as he was a proud political activist for human and animal rights who had also suffered from racial stereotyping.

Reply 1

Jcoppage59

Hi, Ive had a read through this and ill give you a mark.. I think when it comes to your answer to this question you have a real understanding of the differences shown in both poems towards social identity and prejudice as a whole ! Also the way you embedded evidence in to your answer is key for when it comes to answering 20 mark questions. I know for a fact EDEXCEL is a much harder board but as my English teacher once told me "In maths exam you start of with full marks where as for english you start with 0 and earn the marks based on your responses the examiners are trained to find anything in your answer to reward marks for eg. spelling, punctuation and embedding evidence" But youve definitely shown that you have potential of at least getting a grade 5 !.

I would overall give this a 19/20 (This would you get you a grade 4/5)

I hope my feedback helps you

Good Luck

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