How to get my husband to support me?

7

My passion was to become a lawyer. I also have been blessed to teach on the side. My husband is unfortunately unemployed right now. My husband is constantly on my case about working too much. He tells me that I don’t help out with the kids enough. I am the only one that’s paying for all the bills why he does nothing. I used to live with my mom. I want to buy a home next year. I also love my husband. We have 3 kids and they are my world. I tried to take days off but my jobs told me that if I keep not showing up they will suspend me. Please help?

Reply 1

Ciel.

21

Original post

by fallsemester21

My passion was to become a lawyer. I also have been blessed to teach on the side. My husband is unfortunately unemployed right now. My husband is constantly on my case about working too much. He tells me that I don’t help out with the kids enough. I am the only one that’s paying for all the bills why he does nothing. I used to live with my mom. I want to buy a home next year. I also love my husband. We have 3 kids and they are my world. I tried to take days off but my jobs told me that if I keep not showing up they will suspend me. Please help?

uhm, you should probably find a new husband tbh. don't buy a home until you're divorced cause he'll get a share of it

Reply 2

Admit-One

Universities Forum Helper

21

Original post

by fallsemester21

My passion was to become a lawyer. I also have been blessed to teach on the side. My husband is unfortunately unemployed right now. My husband is constantly on my case about working too much. He tells me that I don’t help out with the kids enough. I am the only one that’s paying for all the bills why he does nothing. I used to live with my mom. I want to buy a home next year. I also love my husband. We have 3 kids and they are my world. I tried to take days off but my jobs told me that if I keep not showing up they will suspend me. Please help?

Did you have triplets? Because if not the last three years must have been wild.

https://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/showthread.php?t=7144394

Reply 3

Ciel.

21

Original post

by Admit-One

Did you have triplets? Because if not the last three years must have been wild.
https://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/showthread.php?t=7144394

that's weird... what's the point of making up such a random story, lol

Reply 4

fallsemester21

OP

7

Original post

by Admit-One

Did you have triplets? Because if not the last three years must have been wild.
https://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/showthread.php?t=7144394

We have have 1 child together he has two kids of his own from a previous relationship who I love deeply like they are my own! I am a step mother but I love them like my own ! I hope to get pregnant again but im going to need more of his help! Which is why I asked this question!

Reply 5

fallsemester21

OP

7

Original post

by Ciel.

that's weird... what's the point of making up such a random story, lol

sometimes I wish that it was a random story! As much as I miss being single I’m happy that I was able to find love! But I never knew how stressful that it was! I love my daughter and my two step children like my own! It is a lot of work!

Reply 6

fallsemester21

OP

7

Original post

by Ciel.

uhm, you should probably find a new husband tbh. don't buy a home until you're divorced cause he'll get a share of it

I’m so scared of being alone! Every women wants to be married why give that up? Who will marry me now?

Reply 7

Dunnig Kruger

20

Original post

by fallsemester21

We have have 1 child together he has two kids of his own from a previous relationship who I love deeply like they are my own! I am a step mother but I love them like my own ! I hope to get pregnant again but im going to need more of his help! Which is why I asked this question!

Inform your landlord that you're leaving. Leave your rented home ASAP. Take your child with you. Leave him and his 2 children. In the meantime use contraception so that you don't become pregnant again with the manchild that is your husband.

Divorce him.

Start a new life. Use relatives, friends, paid for help to supervise your child whilst you are at work.

Follow your dream to be a great lawyer and teacher.

Either stay free and single, or get yourself a much better man than your husband. A man that will be a supportive partner to you and not a millstone round your neck.

And there are loads of men that would marry you. I can think of a few guys that I know that would - potentially - be delighted to be married to you.

One of the big downsides to you being married to someone like your husband, is how they can erode your "swagger" - your self confidence, especially when it comes to dating.

Reply 8

Jonah Ramone

19

I'm not sure I agree with responses telling you to immediately leave your husband. Yes his behaviour right now is less than ideal, but there are clearly extenuating circumstances. It must be stressful for him to take care of three children if this has not been the norm for him in the past and he may also be struggling to deal with the fact that he's not working. I think a serious conversation needs to take place between you to evaluate the current situation. He definitely needs to understand the financial situation as it is at present and that any changes to your current working situation (and, knock on effect, your career aspirations) will have a detriment to your economic stability at this time. If the situation doesn't improve then you have a difficult decision on your hands, whether that is a temporary split (to see if he can get his act together) or something more permanent.

I do agree that you should probably not be looking to have another child at this time.

You should also be looking into your company's benefits policy. You are legally obligated a minimum of 24 days off a year (if you work full time) and most reputable firms have further policies for parental obligations and could offer more flexible working routines. Them threatening to suspend you sounds like a massive overstatement unless your absences are prolonged and/or seriously affecting the quality and timeliness of your delivery.

Reply 9

Anonymous #1

Original post

by Ciel.

uhm, you should probably find a new husband tbh. don't buy a home until you're divorced cause he'll get a share of it

When a relationship is going in a rough stage or one partner said something mean to the other, I've noticed your first instinct is to say 'break up' straight away without knowing much at all about the 'real' situation or what they are really going through cause your not there.

Reply 10

Ciel.

21

Original post

by Anonymous

When a relationship is going in a rough stage or one partner said something mean to the other, I've noticed your first instinct is to say 'break up' straight away without knowing much at all about the 'real' situation or what they are really going through cause your not there.

that's not true, i never tell people to break up because one partner 'said something mean to the other', be for real. but in her other threads she says that her husband is a wannabe rapper who brings women over when she's at work so that's a pretty good indicator that they should break up, like if you're going to cheat, at least do it elsewhere, lol

anyway, i think @Admit-One is right and she's not even a real person. cause what kind of solicitor would reveal their real name and photo and then talk so much about their private life on a website like this one?

(edited 9 months ago)

Reply 11

Dunnig Kruger

20

Wow! 3 years ago londonmyst said this of the original poster:
"Some of your attitudes towards guys give the impression of someone with a difficult personality who is likely to be a magnet for all manner of horrid jerks & pestering problem daters of the male variety."

Those were, possibly, the wisest words ever said on this forum.

How to get my husband to support me?

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