The Student Room Group

Gym crush said yes to dinner but didn’t reply to text

I’ve had this gym crush for almost 2 years, I am leaving the gym in 2-3 months so I finally picked up the courage to go up to her and say hi.
To my surprise, we ended up talking for over 45 mins and it was really natural and smooth, I invited her out for dinner after and she said yes so I asked for her WhatsApp, she mentioned she has an international phone so wasn’t sure what the correct phone number format would be but she told me a number anyway.The next day I WhatsApp’s her saying hi it’s X from the gym yesterday etc.. but it’s now been 3 days and I’ve not received a response.I’m confused because our convo went really well and she agreed to dinner.. it didn’t feel forced at all. If she wasn’t interested, I figured she would’ve ended the convo there rather than stand with me for almost an hour.. she could have easily said “sorry I need to go back to working out” or she could have made up an excuse like “I have a bf” but she didn’t.. she agreed to dinner and gave me her number.Now I’m not sure what to do. On one hand, I want to respect her space and not come off as pushy/creepy , especially if she is not interested. However, given the phone situation (international number) uncertain about it being the correct format, and the fact that her WhatsApp profile has no photo.. I can’t help but wonder if I’ve texted the wrong number?I’m scared to approach her again in the gym because i could come across as creepy stalker vibes but a part of me wants to clarify if she did receive the text? I’ve had a crush on her for so long that I want to play this right and not mess up.Any advice please?

Reply 1

It seems possible that there’s a mix up over the number. But there’s also the possibility that she was making an excuse or has had a change of heart. Given the positive interaction you describe I don’t think it would be creepy to have one more go in person. Just back off if you sense that she’s not really up for it

Reply 2

Maybe you should ask her at the gym as she might think you stood her up. Plus it would also make you feel better if you got some answers. It could be a possibility there was a mix up

Reply 3

approach her and say ur not sure if its the right number and mention that you don't want 2 be creepy and ur just asking bcuz of lack of response. if she reponds negatively let it go. update

Reply 4

Original post
by Anonymous
approach her and say ur not sure if its the right number and mention that you don't want 2 be creepy and ur just asking bcuz of lack of response. if she reponds negatively let it go. update


Also make it clear that you don’t mean to pressure her and that you’re both adults rejection isn’t a big deal but just sort of say it in a lighthearted way. I feel like she either panicked and gave you a fake number or it was a genuine mistake. Let us know how it goes! Good luck!

Reply 5

Original post
by Zarek
It seems possible that there’s a mix up over the number. But there’s also the possibility that she was making an excuse or has had a change of heart. Given the positive interaction you describe I don’t think it would be creepy to have one more go in person. Just back off if you sense that she’s not really up for it



Original post
by Anxxsha_xox
Maybe you should ask her at the gym as she might think you stood her up. Plus it would also make you feel better if you got some answers. It could be a possibility there was a mix up



Original post
by Anonymous
approach her and say ur not sure if its the right number and mention that you don't want 2 be creepy and ur just asking bcuz of lack of response. if she reponds negatively let it go. update

Hi everyone, so I saw her again at the gym today (it’s been 2 weeks since the text / last saw her) I approached her and said “hey how’s it going? I just wanted to check if you got my WhatsApp message no worries if you’re not interested though?”

But annoyingly she had a gym class starting and she was just like

“Hi sorry I didn’t see but I can’t talk I have a gym class now and If I’m not there at the start they don’t let me in”

Then she ran away from me over to the class session and it is true that if you’re not there at the start my gym don’t let join.. So was pretty awkward… didn’t have time to figure out if she ghosted or unsure if to approach her again next time

Reply 6

Original post
by Anonymous
Hi everyone, so I saw her again at the gym today (it’s been 2 weeks since the text / last saw her) I approached her and said “hey how’s it going? I just wanted to check if you got my WhatsApp message no worries if you’re not interested though?”
But annoyingly she had a gym class starting and she was just like
“Hi sorry I didn’t see but I can’t talk I have a gym class now and If I’m not there at the start they don’t let me in”
Then she ran away from me over to the class session and it is true that if you’re not there at the start my gym don’t let join.. So was pretty awkward… didn’t have time to figure out if she ghosted or unsure if to approach her again next time

approach her next time if there was an actual class!! u don't have anything 2 lose so dw

Reply 7

Original post
by Anonymous
I’ve had this gym crush for almost 2 years, I am leaving the gym in 2-3 months so I finally picked up the courage to go up to her and say hi.
To my surprise, we ended up talking for over 45 mins and it was really natural and smooth, I invited her out for dinner after and she said yes so I asked for her WhatsApp, she mentioned she has an international phone so wasn’t sure what the correct phone number format would be but she told me a number anyway.The next day I WhatsApp’s her saying hi it’s X from the gym yesterday etc.. but it’s now been 3 days and I’ve not received a response.I’m confused because our convo went really well and she agreed to dinner.. it didn’t feel forced at all. If she wasn’t interested, I figured she would’ve ended the convo there rather than stand with me for almost an hour.. she could have easily said “sorry I need to go back to working out” or she could have made up an excuse like “I have a bf” but she didn’t.. she agreed to dinner and gave me her number.Now I’m not sure what to do. On one hand, I want to respect her space and not come off as pushy/creepy , especially if she is not interested. However, given the phone situation (international number) uncertain about it being the correct format, and the fact that her WhatsApp profile has no photo.. I can’t help but wonder if I’ve texted the wrong number?I’m scared to approach her again in the gym because i could come across as creepy stalker vibes but a part of me wants to clarify if she did receive the text? I’ve had a crush on her for so long that I want to play this right and not mess up.Any advice please?


Next time u go to the gym, I would say smile at her instead of going up to her, if she smiles back she may even speak first or u may know the vibe - whether u texted the wrong number or whether she’s just not interested, then Mayb u can just be like hey how’s ur day going , r we still on for …? If she says no then accept it. You’ve had a crush on her for long so worst she can say is no, it’s defo worth a shot

Reply 8

Original post
by Anonymous
Hi everyone, so I saw her again at the gym today (it’s been 2 weeks since the text / last saw her) I approached her and said “hey how’s it going? I just wanted to check if you got my WhatsApp message no worries if you’re not interested though?”
But annoyingly she had a gym class starting and she was just like
“Hi sorry I didn’t see but I can’t talk I have a gym class now and If I’m not there at the start they don’t let me in”
Then she ran away from me over to the class session and it is true that if you’re not there at the start my gym don’t let join.. So was pretty awkward… didn’t have time to figure out if she ghosted or unsure if to approach her again next time


You’ve approached her twice and messaged her. At first we were unsure whether she knew ab the message but you’ve mentioned it now. Next time you see her at the gym just smile and go about your business - don’t approach her again or stare at her. If she comes up to you, she’s interested and if she doesn’t just move on!!

Reply 9

Mistakes happen. Ask her again. If she finds it "creepy" or uncomfortable, then forget her and don't ask again.

It is women's own fault that they often fool men around by saying things they don't mean in situations like this. Don't ever feel bad about at least trying to hold people to their word. And don't let anyone try to convince you that you're in the wrong for it, when technically it is them who are in the wrong.

That doesn't mean either that you should persistently hassle them about it. Give them one chance (it's not 'creepy' to ask twice, for assurance, if you have a feeling that you've misinterpreted something). Then brush them off.

A lot of women don't even know how to say "no", and some of them even like to then blame men for "pressuring" them, when often all those men did was to take her words at face value. What an idiotic communication style.
(edited 9 months ago)

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