The word count is 750 and I got two pieces of writing and I can't choose. Plus it would be great to get some advice and know what to improve.
This one is a thriller: I ran through the dark eerie woods. I needed to get away.
I could hear footsteps behind me, coming closer and closer. My feet were covered in mud, my white nightgown marked as I stumbled over the hidden bushes. I wished I could go back to this morning, to being safe—or what I believed to be safe. If only I hadn’t listened to the voices inside my head, urging me to look into my suspicions. But then I would have never found out the dark secrets lurking at my so-called home. Yet I never imagined the secrets and lies were as dark and deep as this. The rain shot down like bullets; my feet splashed with every step I took. My body trembled at the harsh, biting cold. The trees grew darker as I ran further into the woods – their dark, ominous towering figures above me. My thighs ached, my muscles felt as if they were being stretched. I wished I had done more exercise, but I was kept confined. The footsteps behind me were getting louder and louder; I needed to run faster. The branches on the trees grew thicker and longer as if they were going to grab me at any moment. The ground was smooth yet hard. The soft, wet mud marked a print onto my feet, yet my skin was red and raw with cuts and blisters as I ran, stepping on broken twigs and small rocks. I was a mess, yet that didn’t bother me. There were more important things at stake, such as my life being in danger. As I ran, I could hear whispers in the wind, echoing for me to go back to the house. But I would not listen to the voices repeating in my head. They helped me once, so who’s to say they’ll help me again? The voices echoed so deep inside of me, I felt compelled to listen. But no, I was better than this. I would not give in.
I stopped, running out of breath. Every breath I took felt like my ribs were closing in. I scanned, surveying the wood with heavy breaths, for any place to hide. I hid behind a wide, tall tree, waiting, waiting for my captor to go past me. I needed to go back to my house, my prison, my mental asylum – so many memories that have been implanted and manipulated. I needed to get hold of a phone, or any device to call someone. But who? And where would I find such devices? There were no TVs, no phones, or any other devices that I was aware of. Only an outdated laptop that had no access to the internet was constantly being monitored. Yet maybe that was another lie, maybe there was a hidden device that had access to the outside world. I remembered the box hidden underneath the wardrobe, that contained the truth that turned my world upside down. The box containing my birth certificate and my medical records, sending my world into chaos. Everything I knew was a lie. I blinked, my eyes watering at the trust that had been broken.
I waited for a few seconds, holding my breath. Silence.
I came out of my hiding, ready to run back when a hand grabbed me – making me fall. I opened my mouth and screamed, but the sound was quickly replaced with a gag. I thrashed my body, trying to get out of their hold, but their grip was too strong. I looked at my “mother” – the imposter – seeing the difference clearly now. Her hair was being stroked as the touch was so tender, telling me I had everything wrong; it was a hallucination. My body stopped thrashing as I lay still, maybe I was hallucinating... I closed my eyes, waiting to go back home – wanting to feel safe. With a jolt, I opened my eyes and realized it was real. I was right. I am not insane. I am not insane. I am not insane. It was all a lie.
My “mother” saw this, and her eyes went cold. My legs were being dragged, my body thrashing, trying to hold onto anything to stop. The voices inside me told me to believe this woman, yet I ignored them. As I was being dragged into my unknown fate, I repeated the words inside me. I am not insane. I am not insane. So I wouldn’t forget.
I am not insane. I am not insane. I am not insane.
This next one is a fantasy: The clouds hovered above the castle, threatening to fall like bullets. The trees looked taller – their shadows creeping up to the castle. Any light from the sun vanished – an ominous chill surrounding me. Shadows flickered across the room as if they were dancing – fleeting out of my sight. I could hear the clock ticking – tick tock – waiting for midnight to strike. I walked past narrow hallways. Crept up winding stairs, tiptoed past the grotesque, hideous, marble statues (as if they were going to come alive at any minute and get me) to find a door with a keyhole in it. I found a key in the courtyard, near the rose bushes, hidden in a wooden box, half hidden out of sight. Anyone would have walked past the statues of a young man, not noticing what lay in his half-closed hand but not someone that was as curious and bored as me. Now I was holding a dusty key – the metallic making my hands cold. I sighed. There was no door with a keyhole that I could see – all the doors were unlocked and had no holes in them. Maybe this was a lost key or a gate key, I would have asked someone, but it was only me in the castle. There was no sign of any other living beings anywhere. I glanced down at the key in my hand – my hope disappearing. I walked away. There was no way out unless he willed it. I was not a prisoner, yet I was not free either. Trapped in a castle yet treated as a guest – a princess. I find the whole thing quite unbelievable and strange. A wave of nostalgia hits me as I walk through the hallways. I look at how my life has changed so drastically over a short period of time. Being raised and born into a wealthy family. To then his wealth and business failing as no one was buying paintings anymore no matter how talented and skilled my father was. We still had money, but it soon vanished as my mother couldn’t stop the need to buy everything that was the best. We didn’t even have enough money to get my brother married as that would be another head to eat. The only thing that allowed us to survive was my hunting skills. It was a hobby that my mother despised as it was not fit for a lady, but it kept us going. So, when my father got a visitor willing to pay more money than we could have ever imagined for my hand in marriage – my father didn't hesitate to say yes. Now I am married to a creature, a man yet something else entirely. Married to a wealthy man in a big, grand castle in the middle of the desolate wood. I do know where he lives and how far I am away from home. I passed out through the whole journey and opened my eyes as soon as we arrived here. I do know how he knows me and what he expects of me. He has given me everything any woman desires for, yet it has not taken away my suspicions, loneliness and doubts of this place. Now a few months have passed, and he has gone away for something important, and I am alone with a key in my hand – hoping to find something, anything. I blink, returning to my surroundings – my memories travelling to the back of my mind. I look around and find myself confused. I do not know where I am; I have not seen this part of the castle before. This hallway is darker than the rest – hidden out of plain sight. No one would have noticed it but I have managed to come across this. Yet I can't shake the feeling that I was meant to come here that maybe this place was trying to tell me something. I squint, trying to find my way in the dark. I can see a door with intricate gold drawings and a gold handle. I walk faster, my heart pounding. It cannot be the door that I needed. As I come closer, I can see the outline of the keyhole. I walk faster, nearly a run as my pulse quickens. I put the key into the hole and twisted and turned the key. I open the door. I step inside and look around and scream. I try to turn out but the door behind me shuts with a lock.