degree apprenticeship and abusive brown household

Hi!
i would love some advice. I'm a muslim girl with South Asian heritage and my parents are bat **** crazy. I'm sick of them. They constantly tell me to move out, and get out of their hair. I very often have to ask my mum to stop hitting me or leave me alone. i have hours of voice recordings that i take when she comes into my room to scream at me or call me a slut over and over. She made me pull out of therapy. I'm starting a degree apprenticeship in finance this september and i'm concerned about it. I have 0 support systems available, and i'm just scared about how I'll do and cope with it all. I'm diagnosed with depression and anxiety and am scared about how to manage all the different aspects. I take medication atm, but have gone through 3 different types of anti depressants and it didn't work. I'm still trying.

Reply 1

Robin8

Hey, didn’t want to read and run. Hugs to you. You’ve done so well considering what you put up with ! Can you afford to move out? Please get back into therapy and move out.

Reply 2

souljav

Hi,

Sorry to hear what you're going through. Firstly, I would try to focus on the positives. Its great that you are making strides towards a better future for yourself by getting on the degree apprenticeship. I would suggest using that as a basis to remember things will get better and to plan for what to do next. Think about what you vision is for where you want to be in 5 and 10 years time. That will help you recognise how temporary this hardship you're going through is in the big picture. That not to say its nothing or having no impact now.

I'm guessing you're not in a position to move out, but it might be something you want to try to make happen as soon as possible. Try to save up enough to get out. You can try to speak to your university, they might be able to support (you are technically their student) with housing accommodation if you are able to explain the situation, or point you towards further help and support.

Not a professional, but sounds like the medication probably won't work. The direct causes of the depression and anxiety are coming externally and continuously from your parents, its not past trauma that has stopped. Medication can only do so much, and help treat so much. You will need to find your own solutions that take you out of the "fire" and deal with the cause, like getting away, or setting boundaries before you can address the symptoms in this case. Try to get back to therapy if that was helping you, if you can.

I hope that helps and remember, you will get through this!.

let us know how things go, or feel free to reach out if you need more help.

Reply 3

Flamingo10

Sometimes you have to try a lot of different antidepressant until you get the one that works for you. Everyone is different and so no one knows what will work for you until you try them.

Reply 4

JasmineAcademic

I’m sooo sorry girl 😩
Speak to your GP about your situation, get them to write a letter for you and take it to your local council or housing association. They should be able to help you to find alternative accommodation.

Alternatively speak directly to a council housing department and see what support you could get.

I would also very much recommend contacting refuge, a women’s charity for those suffering emotional or physical abuse at home. They can really help and advise you or your concerns. You need out of there as soon as possible. Having mental health issue on top of all this makes you a vulnerable adult and you will be surprised at the support available to you.

https://www.nationaldahelpline.org.uk/

Also women’s aid could point you in the right direction. There are option on both sites to talk via online chat if you didn’t feel comfortable over the phone. - https://www.womensaid.org.uk/information-support/

Welll done on all your achievements despite the very difficult situation you are in ❤️