Muslim Brothers and Sisters Only Please
Salaam Brothers and Sisters. I hope you are well in the strongest of health and imaan. I required your advice please on what to do. I loved this girl and I still love her so much although we ended our haram relationship nearly 7 months ago. She said “In pleasing Allah, in becoming a better muslim and the best version of herself she had to.” Which meant contact, meeting one and other was no longer possible. At the time I waited 3 and a half years one due to her completing university and two because she told me at the time before meeting me marriage was not something in her mind and hence why I took the step in making her aware of my intention of marrying her I wanted to marry her she was aware, my mother was aware. Attempts from her side to give indications to her father was aware and her mother just drew a line on marriage but both were of strict nature. After everything I done for her throughout the 3 years of waiting which included looking after her health, taking care of her, ensuring she felt safe and sound yes please before you say it’s a haram relationship I would always ensure she was dropped and seen through home for her own welfare and safety, in supporting her in her career and educational ambitions by utilising contacts in the forms of organisations to help obtain work experience in her subject of study, applying for jobs and supporting her applications throughout whilst being there to support her in her dark days for example from almost dropping out of university to ultimately being their in her final third of university and her gaining a first class degree. Purely because of not only how much love I have for her but thinking in the best of interest of her and prioritising her most as a potential or perspective husband had it been would and even though I still love her what do I do. To even going to Umrah in the intention of our marriage being done what do I do to marry her please. I am lost for words, I am heartbroken and just sad I am no longer happy as I was when I was with her. I get teased and back bitted for it by people at work who knew of us okay albeit she came to visit the workplace because she just occasionally had general purpose visits itself what more do I do. Please any advice at all.
I am sorry for making this long but thank you for your help and support and taking the time to read this.
I am sorry for making this long but thank you for your help and support and taking the time to read this.
Reply 1
You have:
Your youth.
Your health.
Your faith.
Your freedom.
Your income.
Your intelligence.
Your decent, caring, loving heart.
Your family.
Your friends.
People that love you.
They are all amazing, miraculous, wonderful gifts.
Your time to be happy is now.
You also have the opportunity now to give so much to others. To make the world a better place.
One metaphorical way of looking at it is that you're an IT skills training and consultancy company. And that you have multiple levels to your business:
Bronze: you publish youtube videos, which anyone can watch.
Silver: you provide free or nearly free mini-conferences.
Gold: you provide online training and guidance via Zoom.
Platinum: you go to client's businesses and provide solutions to their IT issues.
Each level requires more commitment from the other person, And in return you give them more of your valuable time.
You provide your Platinum service only to the people willing to pay for it. And you provide the Bronze, Silver and Gold levels as stepping stones to Platinum.
Also, if someone was your one and only Platinum Club member, and they decided to drop out, you'd do some active marketing to try to retain them. But when it became clear they were adamant they no longer wanted to be Platinum, you'd turn your attention to attracting more Bronzes. And in providing value to the Silvers and Golds.
Your youth.
Your health.
Your faith.
Your freedom.
Your income.
Your intelligence.
Your decent, caring, loving heart.
Your family.
Your friends.
People that love you.
They are all amazing, miraculous, wonderful gifts.
Your time to be happy is now.
You also have the opportunity now to give so much to others. To make the world a better place.
One metaphorical way of looking at it is that you're an IT skills training and consultancy company. And that you have multiple levels to your business:
Bronze: you publish youtube videos, which anyone can watch.
Silver: you provide free or nearly free mini-conferences.
Gold: you provide online training and guidance via Zoom.
Platinum: you go to client's businesses and provide solutions to their IT issues.
Each level requires more commitment from the other person, And in return you give them more of your valuable time.
You provide your Platinum service only to the people willing to pay for it. And you provide the Bronze, Silver and Gold levels as stepping stones to Platinum.
Also, if someone was your one and only Platinum Club member, and they decided to drop out, you'd do some active marketing to try to retain them. But when it became clear they were adamant they no longer wanted to be Platinum, you'd turn your attention to attracting more Bronzes. And in providing value to the Silvers and Golds.
Reply 2
Uhhh. I wish, I can help you my brother. I understand you, but you must be good. If you are not going to get married and you want God's approval: Unfortunately, what you need to do is forget and stand upright, do not be sad, this is a type of test and you will get your reward. May God help you, brother.
(edited 7 months ago)
Reply 3
Original post
by YBMathematicianUhhh. I wish, I can help you my brother. I understand you, but you must be good. If you are not going to get married and you want God's approval: Unfortunately, what you need to do is forget and stand upright, do not be sad, this is a type of test and you will get your reward. May God help you, brother.
Thank you for your advice
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