Going into 3rd year at uni will I ever get laid

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Reply 20

Original post

by surf_lozz

Yes that’s correct. Due to excessive masturbation & cybersex resulting in loss self esteem, missed opportunities & fear intimacy and rejection. To have something intimate & potentially meaningful is when you don’t go out your way wanting it.

There's a lot of wisdom and great advice packed into 2 lines there.

From my own personal experience on the "when you least expect it" front, the way I'd put it is that every time I've entered into a new relationship it has been a result of me being highly active and pro-active in terms of putting myself out there and meeting women and interacting with them in a man to woman social context.
With the underlying mental frame that has worked best being one where I've not been outcome dependent on any particular one woman, nor one meeting. Where instead I've been confident that if I keep meeting women, and maintain the right attitude, leading to me speaking and behaving in a way that a proportion of women will be attracted to me, then sooner or later a relationship will be inevitable.
Another part of having the right mental frame has been not taking myself, my life, my interactions with women, especially the first time I meet them, too seriously. Keeping things light is a great way to maintain self-esteem after getting rejected. And injections of humour into the conversation have been good for helping to come across as an attractive man to the sort of women that I gel best with.

Reply 21

Moosevelt

Original post

by Anonymous

I'm at the point of giving up of ever getting laid, I am 20 year old male I work out a lot but girls avoid me. Many say im a nice guy but sometimes too nice. I see other guys get sex so easily even though they are so sleezy. I tried everything, complimenting girls to buying them a drink but nothing works, any tips before I end up being a 50 year old virgin at this rate?