I Messed up with my friend real bad
Ok so I know I’m in the wrong at least a bit but idk how to make it better to start off we’re all 17. Yesterday me and a group of friends did a physical activity for our friends birthday my one friend who I’m pretty close to came to and at one point during it disappeared into the washroom and I had no idea where they went I asked someone and they said she went to the washroom I asked if they looked ok and they were like idk since it was for my friends birthday I kept doing the activity once it was over I went back and saw they still weren’t out with this friend we often don’t comfort each other that much or talk about feelings outside texting and their a private person so I texted them if they were ok and waited eventually they came out and when we were a lil bit away from the group I asked in person are u good.
So it’s over and I’m like do u wanna get boba or smth hoping it would cheer them up they say yes and we put one in google maps and walk 10 mins away turns out the boba shop is closed down and maps lied to us so I ask what they want to do and they said I’m gonna call my dad they do that and we sit in silence and I wait with the, until he picks them up and I go home I didn’t text them for the rest of the day since I thought they would need space I wake up the next day and try to text them normally to see if they wanted to talk about it they weren’t being very receptive so I texted them apologizing for not doing more and they go on a rant about how I act like I hate this group of friends but am all buddy buddy with them and it’s true I have my issues I’m not very close with them and I’ve complained a lot but I just don’t want to be rude so i say smth like ik u hate them more then me then it opens this thing where they say they were having a mental breakdown in the washroom and that we all lack social awareness and I responded with me apologizing again and saying I should have tried harder which opens more of them saying that I just texted and asked and I have no idea how I should respond to this seeing that they told me some stuff but I just keep feeling bad and anything I say I just know is going to make them madder please be brutally honest I just want to be there for her but I fee like I messed up to much
So it’s over and I’m like do u wanna get boba or smth hoping it would cheer them up they say yes and we put one in google maps and walk 10 mins away turns out the boba shop is closed down and maps lied to us so I ask what they want to do and they said I’m gonna call my dad they do that and we sit in silence and I wait with the, until he picks them up and I go home I didn’t text them for the rest of the day since I thought they would need space I wake up the next day and try to text them normally to see if they wanted to talk about it they weren’t being very receptive so I texted them apologizing for not doing more and they go on a rant about how I act like I hate this group of friends but am all buddy buddy with them and it’s true I have my issues I’m not very close with them and I’ve complained a lot but I just don’t want to be rude so i say smth like ik u hate them more then me then it opens this thing where they say they were having a mental breakdown in the washroom and that we all lack social awareness and I responded with me apologizing again and saying I should have tried harder which opens more of them saying that I just texted and asked and I have no idea how I should respond to this seeing that they told me some stuff but I just keep feeling bad and anything I say I just know is going to make them madder please be brutally honest I just want to be there for her but I fee like I messed up to much
Reply 1
Hello Finn876, I think you need to remember that you were kind and did check on them, waited and checked on them again. It sounds like this person has some difficulties and they are not yours to solve. Also, I think they are taking out their anger and discomfort on you because perhaps they don't have another outlet. This is too much responsibility for you. You are a peer/friend and not their parent/carer. It is not your fault that they felt antagonised against. It might be useful for them to speak to their parent or if that sounds ridiculous and not possible, for them to use an online chat service or call the Samaritans so they can talk things through with an anonymous person. Basically, get it off their chest.
Shout 85258 text service https://giveusashout.org/ and Samaritans are on 116 123, just that number I know it looks odd. They are there to listen, no need to be suicidal.
You sound kind and conscientious. You need to look after yourself too.
Shout 85258 text service https://giveusashout.org/ and Samaritans are on 116 123, just that number I know it looks odd. They are there to listen, no need to be suicidal.
You sound kind and conscientious. You need to look after yourself too.
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