Should I give my mum all my money or use it for my future?
So Iβve landed this amazing internship in a brilliant city. Itβs exactly the kind of opportunity Iβve been dreaming about, even if itβs unpaid.
Iβve been saving up to cover accommodation and expenses, and itβs finally within reach.
Hereβs the problem.
My mumβs self-employed and having money trouble. Sheβsβ¦ not the best with finances (massive understatement), but thatβs a whole other story.
If I give her my savings, she can get back on track (and yes, she swears sheβll pay me back). But it means no internship for me. No dream summer. Just hitting pause on everything Iβve worked for.
So what do I do? Put my future on hold to fix my mumβs mistakes? Or finally put myself first?
Iβve been saving up to cover accommodation and expenses, and itβs finally within reach.
Hereβs the problem.
My mumβs self-employed and having money trouble. Sheβsβ¦ not the best with finances (massive understatement), but thatβs a whole other story.
If I give her my savings, she can get back on track (and yes, she swears sheβll pay me back). But it means no internship for me. No dream summer. Just hitting pause on everything Iβve worked for.
So what do I do? Put my future on hold to fix my mumβs mistakes? Or finally put myself first?
Reply 1
12
If you give the money to your mother you must consider it a gift not a loan, at least in your own mind, as it is very unlikely you will see it again. Has she presented you with her plan for the money and what βgetting back on trackβ actually means financially? The way you describe her makes me think you are offering her a short term fix whilst enabling her poor management and she will be back where she started in months if not weeks. On that basis, she would be better seeking debt advice/small business advice, and you would be best using the money to secure your future.
Reply 2
Put yourself first. Youβre not getting that money back if it gets loaned out, and you canβt better yourself long term if you forgo these kind of opportunities.
I'm all for helping family, but giving someone who is awful at managing finances your dream internship money doesn't sound like a viable option.
If she were any sort of decent parent she wouldn't dream of taking it from you.
Direct her to the Citizens Advice Bureau, and do the internship yourself.
If she were any sort of decent parent she wouldn't dream of taking it from you.
Direct her to the Citizens Advice Bureau, and do the internship yourself.
(edited 6 months ago)
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